Liam McKey
About Liam McKey
Liam McKey is a former combat veteran and owner of the only Vegan-Certified ranch in the United States. He has two normal teenage children with his same-race wife. Liam is active in the community of Safford, Arizona where he lives. Mr. McKey is an expert on teenage masturbation addiction and has many degrees from various non-accredited faith-based colleges.
Contact: Website

Bill Cosby Credited with Striking-Down California’s Statute of Limitations on Self-Rape

October 1, 2016 7

Sometimes we have heroes among us and sometimes they are in Hollywood.  Earlier this week, California Governor Jerry Brown signed a monumental bill into law, for which many people credit Bill Cosby for making an idea, a reality.

In July of 2015, SMN reported the case of a woman who accused famed hip-hop comedy star Bill Cosby of rape. As our investigation unfolded, we learned that the accuser had actually self-raped while watching the television show “Picture Page,” staring Bill Cosby. Our […]

How Female Masturbation Affects the Female Body

September 2, 2016 21

A woman’s health is a priority to roughly half of the human population. It’s where babies are made and it’s also where they come from. For a man, making sure his same-race wife’s vagina is in proper working order is no different than taking care of his tools. For the lesser-gender, having a ship-shape vagina is a source of pride, while having a loose and smelly one is a source of shame.

Many of our readers have asked about the physical […]

Member of SMN Comes Out As a Gay

June 3, 2016 9

Earlier this week, the unthinkable happened.  James Wright, a member of SMN Ministries for two months, came out as a gay man.  Unlike most gay people who flamboyantly sing about being gay, Mr. Wright did not admit that he was gay.  SMN Deacon Jacob Franklin, and his keen eye for homogays, outed Mr. Wright himself.

Jacob Franklin described in a statement to church officials the moment when he outed Mr. Wright.  So, I walked by this person and in-passing, I said […]

Target Allows Transgender People to Masturbate in Restroom of Their Choosing

April 20, 2016 5

Earlier this week, French-owned retailer “Target (pronounced, tar-jay)” announced that it will allow transgender people to use and masturbate in whatever restroom they choose to.  This new corporate policy comes amid new laws in North Carolina, Mississippi and Tennessee which restrict access to public restrooms based upon gender.

A spokesman for Target issued a statement, but it was in French, so nobody understood what it meant.  When STOP Masturbation NOW asked a Target employee for a comment, store greeter Steven Wachovina […]

Ted Cruz Trying to Sway the Anti-Masturbation Vote Away From Trump

April 15, 2016 2

Ever since SMN Ministries founder and overall spiritual leader Lonnie Childs declared his endorsement for GOP frontrunner Donald Trump, Texas senator Ted Cruz has been lobbying the Anti-Masturbation community for their support, directly.

Senator Cruz has repeatedly brought-up his 2004 efforts as Solicitor General of Texas to ban the sale of sex toys in Texas as his way of gaining ground on the Trump campaign’s stranglehold on this key Republican demographic.  The Texas Senator’s rhetoric has intensified after Trump’s famous public […]

SMN Ministries Celebrates 1,000th Funeral Protested

March 30, 2016 3

We all know there is no better way to warn people about an eternity in hell then when death is staring them in the face. There is nowhere where this opportunity presents itself better than at a funeral.  At these events you will find: the corpse of a dead person, family members hoping to get rich off of the inheritance, and various other onlookers such as friends, neighbors, and creeps.

Last weekend marked the 1,000th funeral “attended” by members of the […]

The SMN Guide to Male Urination

February 16, 2016 9

One of the biggest questions that we get here at STOP Masturbation NOW is, “How can I urinate without becoming a sinner?” Rest assured, good man!  There are a number of ways to urinate and still be in good-shape come time for the Rapture.

Before we get into the actual act of relieving one’s self, let us cover a couple basics first.

If you are urinating in a public building, see if you can use the cripple’s-only restroom.  They tend to be […]

Is an Absent Father to Blame for Masturbation?

January 15, 2016 10

How would you feel without the love of your father?

The rise of feminism in the US has encouraged many women to become single-parents. In these families, the only contribution the father makes is in the form of child-support payments.  While only 20% of the child-support payment goes towards the child itself, the mother hits a “Pay Day” with the remaining 80%. Thus, the rise of boutique coffee shops in the U.S. and online shoe stores.

But what about the child? Does […]

Self-Purity: The Newest Teenage Fad?

January 6, 2016 10

It seems like every generation is more confused than the generation before it. In the 50’s it was “cool” to wear poodle skirts and comb your hair. In the 60’s, it was “hip” to dress like a homeless person and avoid soapy water while the sexual revolution introduced masturbation into the known world. The 70’s had everyone dancing to Freddie Mercury, lead singer of the Village People, while having sex in the YMCA. The 80’s gave us the first unscrambled […]

Nativity in Blackface

December 22, 2015 6

The holiday season is upon us once again. Like always, secularists and masturbators are trying to distract everyone from the true meaning of Christmas. Unfortunately, this very holy and wonderful holiday is being tarnished by racism once again.

Although the true meaning of Christmas is becoming more of a rumor than anything else, it is important to remember what Christmas is all about. Christmas is the celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ, who (as we all know) was half Jewish […]

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