Tim Tebow Convicted of Murder

April 20, 2015 11

Superbowl winning superstar quarterback for the Philadelphia Eagles, Tim Tebow has been convicted of first degree murder and sentence to life without parole.  Brother Lonnie has called for the public to withhold judgment until all […]

MASTURBATOR REFORMED

March 20, 2015 6

ISLAND MEXICO (SMNNN) Often, we here at Stop Masturbation Now Ministries are asked just how successful are we at converting heathen, self-rapist, foreigners into useful, upstanding, God-fearing, productive members of society. Today, we lambast the […]

Win a Stop Masturbation Now AR-15 Rifle!

September 20, 2014 11

SAFFORD, ARIZ. — Did you know Stop Masturbation Now Ministries Inc. is GIVING AWAY a fully semi-automatic AR-15 assault rifle? Yes! For a limited time, you can enter the official SMN Rifle Raffle to win […]

Staunch Anti-Masturbation Ally Turns Normal

August 9, 2014 8

It’s easy to get discouraged in the fight against masturbation.  Big Masturbation and its allies for years have been undermining the moral fabric of this country through the schools, Hollywood, the LIEberal media and sports. […]

Brother Lonnie’s Ethnic Community Outreach

August 1, 2014 11

There’s been a lot of hateful and just plain wrong comments directed at this holy netsite and Brother Lonnie in particular regarding baseless claims of racism. I am shocked, hurt, outraged, appalled and shocked by […]

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