Anti Masturbation Group Leads Coup to Fix Turkey

July 15, 2016 3

(StopmasturbationNOW)— Turkeys days as the “Masturbation Capital of the Black Sea” are almost over. A anti masturbation advocate and follower of Lonnie Childs has led a military coup in Turkey.   SMN founder and leader […]

Is Masturbation Destroying The Climate?

January 6, 2016 37

SAFFORD AZ (SMNNN) A chilling result of a study, released by Brother Lonnie’s University of Faithfacts, and The Foundation For A Better Tomorrow, entitled: “Masturbation Residue And It’s Effects On The Global Climate “ outlines […]

Fappy Sentenced To Eight Years Imprisonment

December 2, 2015 9

SAFFORD AZ (SMNNN) Paul Horner, the man inside the Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin furry mascot suit has been sentenced to eight years in federal prison following his arrest for accosting sea-animals at Sea World aquarium. […]

Saint-Shaming is NOT Okay

October 28, 2015 6

Once upon a time, our white-male-cis-hetero Forefathers were instructed by God to construct a vessel of righteousness and flee the wicked and perverse generation of the Church of England. Anglicans had legalized marijuana and masturbation, […]

Bananas: Satan’s Fruit

July 30, 2015 19

NATURE- SMNNN Throughout nature, we at B.L.U.F.F and The Foundation For A Better Tomorrow have found a plethora of disgusting natural objects that codify self-rape, but perhaps none is so blatantly obviously created to be […]

A World Gone Mad: Indian Women Advocate Masturbation

March 21, 2015 3

A horrifying glimpse into the unrestrained masturbation practices of the average lesser gendered member of Indian society was unceremoniously leaked onto the internet a few days ago. The video, an abomination even with its short […]

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