Should People Who Masturbate Be Allowed to Vote?


Not for long, God willing.
Confiscated from an early voting station.
Confiscated from an early voting station.

What a country!  As God-appointed Americans, we live in a Christian land, founded on Christian morals by non-masturbating Christian heroes.  One of the great tenets of this fantastic nation in which we reside is the concept of a free democracy.  A government of the people, by the people, for the people.  One of our inalienable rights as a citizens is to partake in an electoral system, where we have the ability to vote on a choice between options, often in an election or on a policy referendum.   

Unfortunately, for now at least, this right also extends to masturbators.

Would you trust this man with the power of a vote?

Considering how immoral, lazy, incompetent and selfish masturbators are and considering how important the voting process is, it begs the question:  Should people who rape themselves be allowed to vote?

When masturbators aren’t working (the few that actually have jobs), they are spending their free time violating themselves, content to pay attention only to the newest masturbation technology or pornographics video, completely ignoring current events or world news.  How can someone as ignorant as that be allowed to make decisions that affect the rest of us?  How could they possibly know that voting Republican is the right choice?

A voting lever to most, a sickening masturbation tool to the depraved.
A voting lever to most, a sickening masturbation tool to the depraved.

I know what some of you are thinking: “Lonnie, masturbators are far too lazy to leave their masturbatoriums to actually get out and vote.  They can’t hurt us.”  Unfortunately, this is not true.  The sad fact is that masturbators get a thrill out of engaging in their filthy little habit behind the curtains of those voting booths.  After they’ve finished, they’ll simply place votes at random.  How else would you explain the success of Barack Hussein Obama?

What are they really up to behind those curtains?
What are they really up to behind those curtains?

We here at STOP Masturbation NOW are lobbying for changes to the current voting laws.  We propose that all voters must pass two blacklight inspections at their voting stations, both before and after they cast a ballot.  If masturbation residue or a vote for a Democrat is discovered, their vote will be null and void and they will be thrown out into the street like the trash that they are.

Simple and effective.
Simple and effective.

For democracy to succeed, we must ensure that the right kind of people are shaping our future.  Normal people, self-celibate people.


God bless some of you,



About Lonnie Childs 46 Articles
Hello, my name is Lonald "Lonnie" Childs and I am the founder and president of the STOP Masturbation NOW anti-masturbation movement. Please visit my Facebook page here, and my unaccredited institution of higher learning here,
Contact: Website

203 Comments on Should People Who Masturbate Be Allowed to Vote?

  1. This can’t be a serious sight.. Self raping.. People are simply pleasuring themselves at their own wish.. In their own available time? Of course people who masturbate work and contribute to society, who gave you the authority to be a moral judge? What outrageous statements!! Who have you the right to undermine people who masturbate? It’s a pleasurable experience, which some May chose to carry out and some may not! Regardless if you choose to masturbate or not, no one is any better or worse than the other, no one had any less or more rights than the other and never will that be the case. Why are you now discriminating against people who choose to do this? First we discriminate against black people and don’t allow them to vote and now you say people who masturbate should be unable to vote? The bible makes no reference of a human not being able to self pleasure, but makes many reference that we should never discriminate others, we must love our enemies and pray for those who persecute you, in your case sir, we as masturbators appear to be your enemy so instead of putting yourself in equal place of god to decide what’s right and wrong, pray for us as we pray for you

    • This can’t be a serious sight.. Self raping.. People are simply pleasuring themselves at their own wish.. In their own available time? Of course people who masturbate work and contribute to society, who gave you the authority to be a moral judge? What outrageous statements!! Who have you the right to undermine people who masturbate? It’s a pleasurable experience, which some May chose to carry out and some may not! Regardless if you choose to masturbate or not, no one is any better or worse than the other, no one had any less or more rights than the other and never will that be the case. Why are you now discriminating against people who choose to do this? First we discriminate against black people and don’t allow them to vote and now you say people who masturbate should be unable to vote? The bible makes no reference of a human not being able to self pleasure, but makes many reference that we should never discriminate others, we must love our enemies and pray for those who persecute you, in your case sir, we as masturbators appear to be your enemy so instead of putting yourself in equal place of god to decide what’s right and wrong, pray for us as we pray for you. Blah blah blah

      • What you do in the bedroom, who you sleep with and where you live and how much money you make has nothing to do with your ability to vote…..this article is ludicrous

    • You are mistaken my child, the parable which tells of the seed falling on stoney ground is a reference to the failure of masturbators. It had to be told in a story. The son of god cannot simply say blessed are the motherfuckers but wankers can just piss off.

  2. Ok for starters… masturbation is not against the law nor is it against “god’s will”. People do it all the time. Sometimes once or twice a day and sometimes maybe one or twice a week. Someone saying they are not allowed to vote is like saying that a gorilla can’t smoke a fucking cigarette. So therefore this is probably the stupidest thing I have read. The bible belts are always saying stupid things (hence this voting/masturbation thing) and I can about assure you that they are probably jacking off or rubbing/fingering themselves right now and have voted for years. I am going to put it all on front street right now. This thing is talking on grounds of discrimination. Discrimination is a sign of bullying. The bible doesn’t say a goddamn word about self pleasure. And I am not even christian! So therefore… you are not the moral judge to the common man nor to the common woman.

  3. You people really sit there and call yourself Christians? Are you serious right now. The fact that you are discriminating against people who say the dragon??? You people are fucking morons. God forbid I’ll jack off every now and again. And it aint rape! Rape is doing something to someone else that doesn’t want it. Really imma sit their look at my hand and be like please don’t touch my dong no stop it hand please don’t rape me. Lmfao you people are fucking stupid

    • Yes, exactly. “God forbids” that you masturbate. Romans 1:24 – “Therefore God gave them up in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves.”

  4. I don’t get the Pray For or Pray Against…. If I pray for them it means I feel they need prayer because they are wrong or sinners and need forgiveness?? So if I pray against, that means the same thing but they don’t deserve forgiveness?

    • I suggest you get back in kitchen and try not to think about matters that don’t concern lesser-gendereds.

      • You are the most despicable person I have ever had the displeasure of knowing off. You are promoting hate and it’s wrong. The Bible may say what it will but you are twisting it to say and do horrible things. You may call yourself a Christian but you are too sick to even understand what you’re doing is so wrong. This is inhumane and I don’t care how long it takes, I’m going to get you arrested or stop you from ever doing something like this again.

  5. Did you hear of the new group: Suppress Masturbation, Enforce Moral Godly Actions, or SMEGMA.
    “Handyman” Dick Woodhardt is the founder…

  6. I don’t life in America and so i can do it over and over again 😀
    But i think this guy lose his Brain by doing something else.Masturbating is good!

  7. This has to be a satire article no way any sane human being would write this in seriousness! Either that or womever wrote this literally only wants the 10 people in america that do not masturbate to be able to vote lol.

  8. I don’t know whether to “pray for” or “against” things comments I like.

    Personally I’ve been using the pray for button as a like button, cause what the fuck else could this masturhater have copied other than the works of the masturbating public?

  9. Lonnie, I’m sorry, but you’re really stupid. And if this article is real, it just shows how fucking closed-minded and weird you are.

  10. Masturbators, fornicators, anyone that engages in sexual activity, should be denied the vote!
    Now lets have an orgy

  11. Um so there’s gonna be like 5 ppl that vote in The next election. wait can Mormons masturbate & do the Amish vote? That might raise the numbers a lil.

  12. Well as Jesus said to the apostles at the last supper,”You Can Beat an Egg ,But You Cant Beat A Wank”St Paul ,s epiphany to the Pulltheheadofit.

    • Actually, according to the story the hand was made before Eve. You think Adam didn’t at least explore his fun bits?

    • *you’re. Filthy self-raper! It’s rotted your spelling ability and replaced it with Satan’s seed!

  13. “If masturbation residue or a vote for a Democrat is discovered, their vote will be null and void and they will be thrown out into the street like the trash that they are.”

    so either you vote exactly how they want or your vote doesn’t count!! hmmmm… that’s the most anti-democracy, anti-american, anti-constitutional thing i’ve ever heard… plus isn’t america dedicated (supposedly) to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness…. trust me when i masturbate there is no doubt i’m in pursuit of happiness!! 😉 Good luck stopping me from voting…

    but seriously this is satire, right?

  14. Shit, I’m jacking it right now, which is making typing this out take longer than usual… Pretty sure Jesus rubbed one out occasionally too.


  16. As a masturbator I can say most of this is true. I rarely get out and have some fun between my job and the sex shop and my self loving hobby, so as you imagine it’s like christmas for me when I get to blow my load all over the screen when I click vote for Obama.

  17. God made us right? . So Did The Book Of Lies (The Bible) Tell US Not To masterbauate?????????????

  18. PLEASE tell me, that this is some type of satire!!!

    First off… They said this country was founded on Christian morals, by non-masturbating Christian heros. How the hell do they know if Washington, or Franklin choked the chicken. And if it was set on Christian morals, why the separation of Church and State?
    Second, they implied that Obama only won due to the votes of masterbators.
    Third, not only did they propose to use black lights on voters before and after voting, and say the votes of those found guilty of playing pocket pool will be thrown out, they flat out said that they will throw out any votes for democrats.
    Forth, Republicans masterbate too. They are just more likely to lie about it.
    Fifth, they said that for democracy to work, they need the right kind of self celibate voters. No, you need to count all the damn votes, including the ones for democrats. If these people are real, and this isn’t a joke (which is unlikely), what they are suggesting, is highly illegal.

  19. I don’t know what is funnier, the satire – or the people with no sense of humour who actually have to ASK if this page is serious. Gee whiz. Wow. I think we should disallow those who don’t get the satirical nature of the page from voting.

  20. Well, there are a lot of masturbators on here. Thank you for your comments and prayer against. Your info is now captured and being turned over to the DoHS. I’m prayering AT you! God Bless, TheRev

  21. i’m masturbating right now! all this anger turns me ON!!! also, Lonnie you are one sexy sumbitch.

  22. Masturbators should not be allowed to vote. I agree with all of the true Christians in this discussion that agree with Dr. Childs’s views on the matter. Praise!!

  23. i will go to the booth, close the curtain and rub til I cum.. then walk to the nearest church and wash it off in your holy water. you dumb ignorant whore.

  24. I think masturbation would do some of you people some good apparently you have too much time on your um hands.

  25. There’s only two kinds of adults in the world: acknowledged masturbators and liars! Great mockery site; I applaud you (with my free hand, of course….) 🙂

  26. People…get beyond the presenting issue………those who can neither walk on water nor truly heal others in mind, body or spirit will quote the Bible…..and condemn others….as though they are sinless…hah! Cant blame em…….what else can they do? They obviously cannot make the world a better place so they might as well try to look good by condemning others….funny, but also sad….in the end these will be the ones to whom the Lord says I NEVER KNEW YOU…….

  27. Whether this is real or not,there are people who actually believe this bolloxology.(no pun intended). Pray for or against? Just for the record,praying is probably the biggest waste of time known to anyone with half a brain. If it worked then we might see some results,but nah,still a huge murder rate in the USA.The worst in the western world.Unfortunately some of its residents would be better suited to live in the time of the inquisition and witch hunts. Now,either it’s a huge piss take or the author of this needs to be slapped about repeatedly with a giant cock.

  28. Prayer and belief are two of the biggest endorphin producers known to man. So is orgasm. Little wonder that such a battleground would draw such a satire, especially one focused on Arizona, where the real fruitcakes live.

    Praised be Onan! Shag on!


    • Someone needs to go back to grammar school and learn about their grammar. Learn the difference between they’re, their and there. It’s just raping not “rapeing”. Masturbating not “masturbateing” Taking instead of “takeing” please learn the difference between our, ours and are. You are instead of ur. Let’s be literate and somewhat intelligent. Mind you I’m gay and I not only masturbate myself but my husband too. Together I’m sure we can wank off enough to glue your first idiotic pamphlet together.

  30. You are an idiot if you think that America is a Christian country. It is frightening that you believe that is the truth. America is a nation with NO national religion and that is just as it should be. The 1796 Treaty with Tripoli states that the United States was “not in any sense founded on the Christian religion”. Most of the Founders were Deists, they thought the universe had a creator, but that he does not concern himself with the daily lives of humans, and does not directly communicate with humans, either by revelation or by sacred books. They spoke often of God, (Nature’s God or the God of Nature), but this was not the God of the bible. They did not deny that there was a person called Jesus, and praised him for his benevolent teachings, but they flatly denied his divinity. The attitude of the age was one of enlightened reason, tolerance, and free thought. The Founding Fathers would turn in their graves if the Christian Extremists had their way with this country.

    Do you know that under a blacklight any biological material fluoresces? Blood, snot, tears, etc. Your blacklight there is bogus.

    And, as if you haven’t be ridiculous enough… you degrade the term of rape with something that is not? I nearly died being raped by a bunch of “Christian” young men from the neighborhood I lived in. If you want to call something rape then let’s talk about the real thing. Where women have to have surgery to repair their vaginas and anuses because they have been so badly hurt. Let’s talk about how many have to have fractures reset, holes drilled in their skulls to let pressure off. Let’s talk about the “Christians” that rape children. You want to talk rape, then you better know what the fuck you are talking about. You are a white man who has no clue what it is like to live without your white privilege. You have no idea what it is to even be a white woman in our society. You couldn’t be further removed probably from understanding anyone else who isn’t like you and your buddies.

    You are a joke and a twisted fuck if all you can focus on is preventing masturbation. Perhaps you have some sexual dysfunction? Perhaps you have a really repressed sexual desire that you are trying not to think about? Whatever it is, go sort your shit out and leave the rest of us alone.

    This atheist is out.

  31. Is the imbecile that wrote this abomination aware of the fact that probably more than 90% of people masturbate???? No one likes to talk too much about it and many lie about doing it, but close to everybody (who isn’t a religiously indoctrinated nut-job) does it. And he comes with lines like “the few who have jobs”? How much of an idiot with less self-awareness than a corn-cob should one have to be to say something like that?

    And how exactly would a law like this be enforced? Obviously, no one would admit to masturbating anymore, so everyone would be squeaky clean, exempted and allowed to vote. Will the government and/or church put mandatory surveillance systems in each house…in bathrooms??? Like…WTF????

  32. There’s no way this is real. Nobody’s this idiotic. Despite every fact being wrong, the author even managed to land on a firmly anti-Christian stance. I get that the whole “lets dominate others just the way Satan loves, but we’ll do it in the name of God because we don’t know the difference anymore” thing is en vogue with modern-day “Christians,” but it has about as much to do with Christianity as suicide bombings have to do with Islam. If you’re going to shove your two inches of faith down everyone’s throat in the name of Christ, maybe you’d like to familiarize yourself with his actual teachings. Moron

  33. A country founded by non-masterbating Christians, no they just slept with their slaves outside of their marriage vows, not very Christian like

  34. I found this very easy to masturbate to, but then again who am I kidding I find everything extremely easy to masturbate to

  35. Thanks Lonnie – it is a great work you are doing – we need to get rid of Democrats, masturbators, liberal church attenders, mega-church attenders, non-church attenders, anyone who reads the NIV Bible (for sure – they are probably masturbating while reading that filthy piece of pornography), RINOs (we can keep the DINOs – unless, of course, they are masturbators), etc..

    I will think of some more people to get rid of from our great Democracy that welcomes all nations and lifts up the name of Jesus. I just have not figure out whether we should stone them or burn them. Maybe we should ship them to Mexico. Do you have a preference??

  36. Lonnie thank you for this! Your face is so cute I just masturbated to it and blew my load all over my laptop on your profile pic. Thanks. I’ll be doing it again in a few hours, but I’m out the door now to vote for my church council. Cheers mate for the most ridiculous thing I’ve read all year. The Onion news group needs you!!

      • so you and your fake god and fake jesus should be outlawed too then, by your own words. Your fuking god in nothing but a fairy tale made up so trolls like you can pound that fairy tale book and quioe to feel self righteous. I would love to get rid of all religion and you fuking christian nuts trying to shove your fucking god and skitzo jesus down everyone’s throat. I will NEVER believe in your stupid god and everyday I say “FUCK YOUR GOD” at least 100 times a day. Hmmm haven’t been struck by lightning yet and doubt it will ever happen LMFAO :-)~

  37. If only your father would have masturbated instead of dumping his load in your mom the world would be a better place.

  38. If GOD did not want us to MASTURBATE! He would not had given us arms long enough to reach down there and he would not had created us with the sensitive sensation of sexual pleasure in doing such things with ourselves! As for the “Self-Rape” concept it is utter stupidity! I was not forced to masturbate. I chose to do so at the free will in which our Creator has born-ed us all with. So I pleasured myself with the freedom of my very own will and which in turn means I had stimulated myself at my own consent. Therefore, where is the “Rape” part? Maybe some of you so-called Christians should be masturbating more often than you do? Maybe you should be masturbating each other in circle jerk sessions? I mean, you who are in agreement with this nonsense have serious issues! God created us as sexual beings. So, come on, jerk yourselves off! Jerk off a good friend in need! Pleasure yourselves make yourselves feel good! We are all sexual by Nature. God created us as he created Nature too. Therefore “Masturbation” is Natural! Get a life! Also, to stop people from voting for masturbating means that no-one will vote ever again simply because everyone who is a Human Being either masturbates or has masturbated before in the passed/past and those whom deny ever masturbating is a liar!

    • If God did not want us to murder he would not have given us arms strong enough to wield a weapon and kill someone with it. Just because you CAN doesn’t mean you SHOULD. Follow the logic, you imbecile? Do you know how stupid you sound, you moronic, masturbating libtard? I will pray at you hard tonight. God bless.

  39. Wait is this a real website

    because lol

    “If masturbation residue or a vote for a Democrat is discovered, their vote will be null and void”

    guess electoral vote in 2016 will be 100% republican? lol

  40. Haha How can someone actually be stupid enough to think this crap up? I am actually impressed. But to agree with this is a whole other level of stupidity that I cannot even fathom.

    • To the flock of nut bags, the link is perfectly fine and takes you to a page with recorded quotes from our founding fathers that ALL say how important it is for affairs of state to stay COMPLETELY separate from the church and the church nut bags. That troll lonnie doesn’t want you reading the TRUTH or thinking for yourselves, that is what the church is for, to think for you and tell you bots what to vote for and which corrupt christian to vote for LOL I am so happy that me and millions of other atheists and masturbators have the right to vote and can and will vote down church bullshit. Again….FUCK YOUR GOD, FUCK THAT SKITZO JESUS AND FUCK THAT WHORE MARY WHO STARTED THE BIGGEST LIE EVER PERPUTRATED ON MANKIND TO KEEP FROM GETTING STONEED TO DEATH. (you have to wonder how many cocks the slut had to suck back then to not be stoned to death) :-)~

  41. Maybe it could determine the outcome. Conservatives jerk with the left and liberals with the right. Independent change off using both, and tea baggers just fondle their bag. They say for it to feel better you should switch hands. That’s How Obama won. Jerk on my friends!

  42. El Saturn is The “God” of This World. He will corrupt all things Natural given us By The True GOD of Life. See, we are Trapped within a Cube Matrix. We are Batteries providing Human Energies to Power The Eternal Time of The Infinite. See, If Everyone does as Internal Source Directs, Then, We would be Able to Understand Human Sexuality and Ourselves without Selfishness toward others taking “Sexual” Frustrations out in the Manner of Rape / Forced Marriage ect. See, The “Ring” gives Ownership of One Person over Another giving way to Guilt as The Indoctrinated Public School system and Religion Force upon us. See, Without Human Reproduction, This System Collapses the Inner workings of the Matrix which Holds us Here, Bound to SIN (e) Wave s which Humans Emit while having Sex. The Artificial intelligence has “Hijacked” this Frequency as sort of a “WiFi” signal that Binds us Here within This Fallen Reality. If This is What drives Washington and Voters Response, Then maybe They Should Take a Realistic View of The Turmoil the Global State is In. ISIS Beheading Children unstoppable / Earthquake s In Diverse Places / A Second Sun Approaches to Purify this Satanic Stronghold. I Fully Support Masturbation and , Hell, I Vote. Does the PedeFile Congressional Elect Vote? Wake Up to Truth, Not Indoctrinated Public Information that Keeps the Masses Confused / Fighting while They are Committing Global Satanic Agendas.

  43. I wish I would have pleasure my sin nuggets and demon stick instead of wasted my time reading this article.

  44. It’s satire. It comes from a very twisted mind like all good satire does. I love that he says “I’ll pray at you” lmao It’s like he’s showing in his own discreet way that even he can’t keep a straight face 😉

  45. You disgust me. Masturbation is a sin? lolololololol I’m sorry but that is just downright ignorant. But there is no wonder you are so bitter….. LMAO

  46. I’m the guy with the sign. This is the funniest website I’ve ever seen. Keep up the good work. I’d check back later, but I’m kind of busy ya know!

  47. Half way through reading this I had to get up to frantically write a police report for both of my hands. To think, I’ve been raping myself for years and I didn’t know! I felt so guilty, I went out and had those filthy things removed from my now purified body! I feel more confident about the sinful desires being completely unfulfilled! Couldn’t be happier!

    • It’s a shame that those are the only two choices available to you, you disgusting freak! You’ve allowed Satan to have complete control of your sin sword. I will pray at you.

  48. I don’t think the problem is voting masturbaters. I think the problem is the voting booths themselves. Those booths have an enclosed feel and encourage people to embrace their most secret of thoughts. Surely every year many a young man and woman who have never voted before enter that booth pure and come out a masturbater! We must do away with the voting booths and this problem will end itself.

  49. This group is the most ridickulis right wing fanatics of all time. I wank off 4 to 8 x’s a day. It very Spiritual Journey. And I do it all to Bare Feet….

  50. It absolutely terrifies me that there are people like you who get to vote. Masturbation is an absolute natural thing to do. Il what terrifies me is people as bat shit crazy as you who get to vote on important things for our country. Seriously this has to be a joke-

  51. I am a simple explorer on your would simply to observe, but this is crazy enough I have to comment. The vast majority of morally advanced species consider self stimulation, when done in the context of a healthy life style, as perfectly wholesome exercise. One of your wise historical figures (you know which one I mean) said “Judge not, least ye be judged.”

  52. Spraying your wad all over the Republican switches of a voting booth in one of life’s greatest pleasures.

  53. My left hand agrees with you. He constantly accuses my right hand of self rape. But, like any self respecting hypocritical Catholic priest, I have seen my left hand do weird, strange, things to my butt when he thinks the right hand isn’t looking.

  54. Ok, here is a scenario. A happily married man is working away from his wife for a period of time. He thinks about his wife and beautiful it is to make love to her. He gets aroused and masturbates. I have had discussions with elders of churches about this. Guess what their opinion and interpretation is? NO SIN HAS BEEN COMMITTED. There is no lustful thoughts about other women, no mind thoughts of adultery. Shoots down the masturbaters can’t vote and it’s a sin theory.

  55. That’s right, not even jesus masturbated, he had his apostils to pleasure his cock in the desert, then when they weren’t around he had that whore mary. Just like his mother mary, he loved taking sperm as much as he could. “Let thy seed not be wasted but fall upon the tongue of the “supposed” virgin” I think the quote went :-)~

  56. After reading this article it makes me want to fall to my knees and pray…..and since I am down there I might as well drop a load of seed on the bible and I can do that just thinking of that gorgeous savior hanging on that cross with the nice chest and big budged. no need to masturbate or touch myself, I just let that holy spirit fill me with the tingles and shivers created in my mind to blow a good load. Then I will take that page of the bible and wipe my ass with it, no good seed should go to waste, plus the only good thing the bible is made for is toilet paper. I think that after that I will watch all the priests and preachers rape more and more children in their churches to get me all worked up for another good one to get off. I am already getting excited thinking of bending lonnie over and giving him a good pounding with my satan sword (of course I will have to wear a rubber because you never know what horrible diseases these christians carry), I can dump the rubber off in the holy water or sacramental wine as I leave, because no one else cares if christians catch anything from each other :-)~

  57. This article is hateful an full of ignorance. Here’s more for u all religious people should be labotamized seeing how most wars in the world were for religious beliefs all praise the high powers believe in do what u want. 1st ammendment states separation between church an state there for it will never pass

  58. There once was a man from Nantucket
    Who had a pecker so long he could suck it.
    He said with a grin
    As he wiped off his chin,
    If my ear was a muff, I would fuck it!

  59. Of course masturbators shouldn’t vote. I bet they think the polling booth is some kind of sexual arcade.

  60. Does the term ‘land of the free’ ring a bell? This is not a Christian country… This is a whatever-you-want to be country so shut the fuck up. Good men and women have died to keep your sorry asses from jacking off… This site is so fucked up! I see articles about random shit that none of it is true! Like the Instagram article. Get your facts straight. You people are so much worse then ‘masturbators’ you’re lying to try and convince people about something that has nothing to do with God or the church… I’m LDS and have asked my bishop many times about it and he says it is not a sin. It’s natural and fucking awesome!

  61. The problem with this is by ruling out everyone who has ever masturbated is that it rules out everyone who was ever 14 years old then no one will be able to vote…and if you said you never did at 14 you are a liar and shouldn’t be able to vote anyway

  62. Yo what the fuck is this??! Will Christians ever be stopped?! You people are not what you claim to be. You say you are gods people but then take rights away from people because your story book may or may not slightly hint at their (and yours by the way) actions being bad or wrong. Gods people and understanding and loving but you are all hateful and spiteful and angry and the opposite of what this world needs. You need to love your body and you let children learn to love their bodies. You are all terrible for saying what you have said to your fellow sinners

  63. Wow this is pathetic. I can see that not only is this a strictly conservative website movement, but it is hilariously using things like global warming to condem masturbation. In addition it seems that this movement is also pro-republican party only seeing that the person who wrote this that a person’s vote should be discarded because it was for a Democrat. This website is as big a joke as Donald Trump’s hair.

  64. Ahh yes, the first thing I think of when I go to vote is, ¨ Mmmm, Damn I cant wait to get in that booth, and jack it to Donald trump, OOOh yeah, his hairs so damn sexy.”Why would you wank it in public anyway. You would be arrest, put in prison and then killed, it would be really easy to rape you then. ITS TIME TO STOP!!!

  65. There was a young man from Kent
    Whose cock was extremely bent
    To save him the trouble
    He put in double
    But instead of cumming
    He went

  66. this website makes me want to die instead of being classified in the same general category of the people on this website

  67. I think that I have solved the obesity epidemic in America- The Semen is building up because of not masturbating. Then, the body turns the semen into body fat, making people obese. Masturbate!

  68. So have you guys read the satanic bible?, I think its pretty good. Also i love sucking Hitlers daddy juice from his throbbing penis.

  69. hahahshabaha. guess what im. gonna masturbate right now while thinking about this author. and her hands all over my dugh ( thats dick for too religious people out there)

  70. Well I usually don’t vote but I think I’m going to refrain from whacking off for at least a month that way come time to vote for Hillary I’m gonna go into a booth and just dump my load all over the place I may go to jail but I’ll gladly accept the charge

  71. No big surprise that the writer is a big, fat disgusting looking guy who decided to hate anything sexual because he already knows no one will find him sexually attracted. So he takes the easy way out and denounces everything that will bring sexual pleasure to others.

  72. I’m a masturbator, but also a straight A-student, I watch the news every day and I’m very interested in politics. This is how my whole school is, and they will all have jobs later, most even will go to college.

    • My friend told me about this terrific website that contains a plethora of anti masterbatory education tools. I enourage you all to give it a look.

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