Crime

Church Leaders and Parents are Under Arrest for Spanking “The Gay” out Of Their Children

As reported earlier today by the Associated Press, the parents of Lucas and Christopher Leonard, along with other members of the Word of Life Church, were arrested for Spanking The Gay out of these young men. The apparent beating took place during an intervention at the church itself.  According to prosecutors, the actual charge is “manslaughter”, given the fact that both men died before their homosexuality could be subdued.

Much like SMN Ministries, the World of Life Church functions as both a ministry and residence for followers of the church. Unlike SMN Ministries, however, the World of Life Church had little to no experience in this form of conversion therapy and as a result, the pro-masturbation authorities of New Haven, New York have arrested everyone involved.

When asked for comment, Rev. Lonnie Childs expressed regret for the loss of life, but also commended the family and church members of World of Life Church, for doing what they felt was the right decision.

“It is with a heavy-heart, and unsoiled hands, that I convey my deepest sympathy for the organizers of this intervention. I also hope that Lucas and Christopher’s time in hell can be shortened by vigorous prayer and monetary donations to SMN ministries in remembrance of these young men.”

If you are suspicious about the proper and safe way to spank the gay out of your children, we encourage you to refer to our numerous “How To” articles on this holy netsite that instruct you on the proper way to spank the gay out of your children and stay out of jail at the same time.

http://news.yahoo.com/police-unsure-sins-provoked-attack-brothers-054706362.html

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MarkA Happy Gay TeenBrixNameless AndrewNigel Covington Recent comment authors
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Nigel Covington
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Truly terrible news and a good example of what rank amateurs can do unintentionally. I have sent my donation of $10,000 to SMN Ministries.

Nameless Andrew
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Nameless Andrew

“the proper way to spank the gay out of your children and stay out of jail at the same time” Wow, just wow. It’s okay to argue with some people over certain subjects, but sometimes you just find things that are so extreme and absurd you don’t even bother arguing. At first I actually thought this was an overly exaggerated joke criticizing Christianity, I thought they were kidding and were trying to prove a point. Only after a few minutes I realized they’re serious. It’s the worst imaginable form of ignorance. The people who made this website… They’re the ones… Read more »

Brix
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Brix

Where can I find the details for making a deposit?

A Happy Gay Teen
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A Happy Gay Teen

I wish my pastor would spank the gay out of me. I’ll be black and blue before he’s done. ??? #Spankmefather

Mark
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Mark

Didn’t Jesus hang out with prostitutes and homosexuals and talk about ‘those that have never sinned’ being the only ones allowed to throw stones (or spank)? ‘Spanking’ and sin out of a person is itself a perversion of Christianity. Liam, you should be ashamed (and read about what Jesus actually did?)