Burn “The Man” Now…Burn IN HELL Later!

Eternal fire awaits those who "Burn The Man"

Friends, I want to warn you about a nefarious group of liberal anarchists who make annual pilgrimages to the Black Rock desert in Mexico to partake in the so-called “Burning Man” festival.

The Burning Man Project started in the early 1980’s after a group of San Franciscan hippers high on the dangerous street drug “ellis dee” decided to rebel against Godly morals by traveling to and masturbating in all 50 United States.  Typical of stupid and lazy drugged-out atheists, they failed to adequately prepare for the undertaking and ran out of gas in the middle of the desert.  With nothing better to do, the group decided to masturbate their dried-out sin zones (“Burn The Man”) and, like some disturbing black magic, a new Satanic movement was born.

The festival takes place over a 7-day period at the end of summer and commences with the ritualistic “Burning of The Man” where the thousands of attendees participate in a gigantic circle-jerking-off session.  The depraved sinnery that take place over those 7 days reads like the bucket list for your typical Godless liberal:  Marijuana injecting, hemp-bonging, tent-pitching, sodomy, mouth sex, race mixing, secular art & music, nudity, Communism, Bible-Burning and Obama-worshipping.

Please hold your Bible, guns, and children close this week in prayer, and, as always, God bless some of you!


-Lonnie Childs

Typical Burning Man attendee
Typical Burning Man attendee
Ellis Dee has ravaged the brain of this hipper.
Ellis Dee has ravaged the brain of this hipper.
Do you really want your children, or anyone for that matter, masturbating in the desert?
Do you really want your children, or anyone for that matter, masturbating in the desert?
Festival-goer preparing for "The Burn"
Festival-goer preparing for “The Burn”


About Lonnie Childs 38 Articles

Hello, my name is Lonald “Lonnie” Childs and I am the founder and president of the STOP Masturbation NOW anti-masturbation movement.
Please visit my Facebook page here, https://www.facebook.com/originalsmn
and my unaccredited institution of higher learning here,

Contact: Website

58 Comments on Burn “The Man” Now…Burn IN HELL Later!

  1. That is offensive and rude and not even true. Try going to one and actually asking about it. First, satanism *laveyan satanism which is the most popular type* don’t even worship the devil. They worship themselves. They don’t worship any deity or idol. They worship themselves and protect themselves from harm. They don’t do any sacrificing or hating. They don’t believe in evil. They believe in themselves and what is right for them. As a Christian, I believe that they can believe in whatever they want. I mean, I have no proof god exists. There is no proof. No real hard evidence. Just a book that isn’t meant to be taken literally. Second, it is a matter of self expression and was traditionally a bonfire. It is a place of gathering and doing things that express yourself, like going to church. It has artworks and many different activities. If you really think they masturbate, go and find out. Unless you are a narrowminded fuck that only realise on what people say.
    God bless your soul,

  2. The fuck is wrong with you all. You belive this wirdo Lonnie. I mean have any of you been to burning man? Go down there and see what it actually is like. All of you wiredos are just pathetic pieces of crap!

  3. Lonnie and Truffle shame on you. Stop harassing Michael and do something productive with your time. Lonald, please start jacking me off at a medium pace and Truffle or should I call you by your new name FLUFFLE please begin tounging my bunghole and get us boys ready for the circle jerk at my place. Thank you. And by the way I’ve passed Jasper Centaur up on the prayer leaderboard. Now I can tea bag him from above!


  4. This is lies! Burning Man isn’t like this… Burning Man sets up several workshops every year, yes there is one called Vital Sex but they do NOT masturbate lol it’s a workship about freeing sexual energy to help you with your partner in the most modest and spiritual way, it helps when you have problems too… there is other workships too like meditation, reki massages and what not, stuff like that, when they do go around a fire they do not masturbate… they dance (and not naked they have bathing suits, shorts and sleaveless shirts or bikinis on), so you need to stop spreading lies about stuff… how this can help you with your “religion” i have no idea…

    • What you describe is pure Witchcraft and the devil worshippers who attend this wicked ritual should cast themselves into the fire before God does it for them.

  5. God help us. What will Satan come up with next. Ritual human sacrifice by burning a man. This generation is lost to hellfire and damnation. I pray for Armageddon to come soon. Lord bring me to rapture as soon a possible.

  6. shocking! thank you michelle for your bracing feminine counterpoint but i hope we can agree that dispite our differences concerning the role od selfrape in Burning the Man Festival, marijuana injecting and race mixing are not christian. praise be.

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