Are You Wiener Warrior or Slave to your Weiner? Interactive Quiz

(StopMasturbationNOW)—We find that there are two types of people in this world. Those who control their urges, don’t masturbate, and therefore lead happy productive healthy lives. Then there are those who live to serve their penis, ones who constantly need to touch it in a cycle of shame, insecurity, dependency, depression and disease.

Do you know which one you are? Take our quiz to determine if you are a wiener warrior or slave to your wiener?

[mlw_quizmaster quiz=1]

26 Comments on Are You Wiener Warrior or Slave to your Weiner? Interactive Quiz

  1. Thank you for the constructive criticism and I will immediately focus on things I can improve on. Praise!

  2. Apparently I have some areas that need work. But with brother Lonnie’s teachings and love along with the support and fellowship I get from the good folks at Stop Masturbation Now I know I to can lead a life of purity. Thank you Lonnie!

  3. I scored “0”. WooHoo. I am the engineer on the train to Hell. ALL ABOARD fellow babies

  4. I got a perfect score. I didn’t bother to take the test because Jesus told me that I’m perfect, right after I drank a quart of tequila one night. Jesus wouldn’t lie to me when I’m drunk.

  5. I got a score of 80, what does this mean, i answered honestly (the score should have been perfect)

  6. OH YEAH! I GOT A 0! HEIL HITLER! 666 IS MY LUCKY NUMBER! IBLEES AND SHAITAAN ARE MY TRUE GODS! GO SATAN ALL ABOARD THE TRAIN TO HELL HOP ABOARD!!!!!

  7. Are you people for real? Besides why is it that so many of the church are and have been involved in sex scandals usually with minors, perhaps if they had a really good long masturbating session more often that sort of thing wouldn’t happen!
    Hypocrites and parasites the lot of you!
    A Men

    • How, exactly, are we “hypocrites”? We both preach AND practice a life of self-celibacy. Don’t make the mistake of lumping us in with those Mary-worshiping heathen Catholics who molest children. We are not associated with them in any way, shape or form. Praise!

  8. I don’t masturbate, my priest does it for me to absolve me from eternal damnation. What a true saint Revered Smith is (especially when he warms his hands first)

  9. I got a perfect score of Zero! Yes!!! I am going to go masturbate to some porn. Then I am going to masturbate with my wife! Oh yeah! Praise!!!

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