Family Fun





195 Comments on Family Fun

  1. A good, fun, wholesome game, that can even be enjoyed by lesser-gendereds, such as myself. Praise!

    • if you praise then you must graze and graze is close to grape which leads to rape so Praise = Raped By god Has FISTS YOUR ASSHOLE SO MANY TIMES YOU SNAP OUT OF YOUR DELUSION AND REALIZE ITS YOUR ABUSIVE FATHER

      • You say you don’t want your child to masturbate, correct? Then why are you taking them to this site? There are plenty of other sites that are safe and they can play on, not this one for people with sticks up their asses. You all who support this need to get yourselves checked. I’m afraid Christ can’t even save you.

        • I went to the Check yourself clinic today and low and behold it turns out that I’m great. Surprisingly enough they also told me that God doesn’t exist which I knew anyway because, lets face it, he’s just a character from a book. So thanks for the Check yourself advice. Now may I offer you some, you should look into evolution. It’s actually based on FACT and evidence. Oh, and stop watching FOX. Now those Gobshites over there love a good wank.

    • I bet the only reason they do so is to see the chick in her panties, as she’s about to touch herself.

      • Megan, i truly feel sorry for you. If you look closer to the “chick in her panties” her hand is nowhere close to her sin zone. She is simply making sure that her under garment are on properly. My guess is you don’t wear suitable/clean under garments other wise you would not judge her. Praise on high.

        • Still. This claims to be a ‘family fun’ website, but I don’t think it’s appropriate for little kids to see a woman with panties on, and her fingers nearly inside. I’m not trying to hate, but I’m just trying to state the obvious here. How ‘christian’.

          • as i stated before her fingers are nowhere close to her sin zone. Last time I checked all normal female christian’s wear suitable under garments. Lets all pray for this non-normal sinner! Praise!

        • omg …. youre getting mad for her “judging” someone , yet youre judging gays and its “okay” …. And i dont know about you , but NO GIRL STICKS THEIR FINGERS into their underwear near their vagina to make sure “theyre on”

          • I think you seriously need God in your life, so that he can cure your blindness, sister. Her fingers are clearly out her sin zone, as our friend Jasper said, the image is stating that checking if your panties are still in position is not wrong, I do it all the time and it is okay.

    • Get them an Xbox. They have non violent games on Xbox and other websites, and even if they did play violent video games it doesn’t affect them. I’ve played just about every COD, Mass Effect, Halo, and pretty much every violent game and I never got violent, my nephews whose the same isn’t either, and I don’t jerk off, I come to the site to look at religious idiots like you

  2. I tried so many times to find a match, the game just told me to stop. But, I persevered and after 6 days, I finally made my first match. I LOVE this game!! It’s very challenging.

    • What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you anti-masturbator? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Masturbation Club, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret butt raids, and I have over 300 confirmed faps. I am trained in self-raping and I’m the top cum shooter in the entire club. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of fingers across my right hand and my dick is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing I call my jizz. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can masturbate anywhere, anytime, and I can jizz on you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in self-rape, but I have access to the entire arsenal of lotion and I will use it to its full extent to jack-off my miserable balls onto your face, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue and whacked your dick off. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will cum fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

    • Laura don’t stop masturbating
      Even when the world tells you it’s wrong believe in your heart
      That’s it’s alright

    • Maybe if you don’t let her problems interfere with your life then there wouldn’t be any problems. Stop going into other peoples life you Christian delinquint.

  3. I think I’ll just stick with playing cards if I want to do something as boring and dull as a matching game.

  4. Whoever made this website is a fucking cunt, and if they think Im going to hell for supporting masturbation then they can fuck off in their own illusions they have made for themselves.

  5. Call yourselves followers of God? christians my ass, even if I was a thiest (thats a beleiver of god by the way) I still would object to what you are doing

  6. god praise the lord for showing me the light, I shall not do the nasty any longer.
    All hail Allah

  7. The best way to avoid masturbation, for me at least, is to fuck the shit out of my girlfriend. You all should try it. Or you can fuck yourselves.

      • ohhh Nikita , ive seen many of your comments and youre the result of the inbred that religion is known to produce … Not only that but he said “fuck the shit out of HIS girlfriend” although the next sentence does say “you all should try it” you should have a high enough IQ to know he doesnt mean his girlfriend. Although i know im setting my expectations too high .. After re-reading my comment , i realized that i used too big of words for you to comprehend …

        • Skyy, here’s a word that is too big for YOU: Grammar motherfucka, do you use it? Seriously, half your comments are like trying to read someone typing in a second language.

  8. To prevent my boyfriend from masturbationg I found a great solution …

    I give him blowjobs everyday !

  9. Family fun?… Here’s an idea; All family members gather in the living room, everybody remove all clothing, sit down in a circle and have a good circle-jerk! For desert, have a nice family orgy. P.S. I’ll be off in a corner beating off, if anybody needs me for anything.

  10. W8 w8 w8 if its better to spill your seed into the belly of a whore then to spill it on the ground but adultery is a sin, what am i supposed to do when i have a medical condition that pushes up against the nerves that lead to my prostrate and my penis and make me horny all the time and my wife says no?

  11. this website made me laugh so bad i went to the hospital and jerked off right there with the sexy nurse while she but a bandaid on my stumach hahahahahhahahaha fucking retards

  12. I need major help! I nearly masturbate 24/7. I am afraid I will never find a wife and therefore I will end up raping to lose my virginity. So please someone have sex with me so I don’t rape anyone. #lol

  13. Fuck this website i jack off all the time and all it does is give me head aches i jack off every where especially in church #yolo #baeislife #satanisbae

  14. Hello everyone my name is Bryce Sexton. I’m here looking for a heavy set African American women who wouldn’t mind fucking be with a banana. Only African Americans only unless you a very dark Mexican that has big black lips. And if you could wear an extra small thong that would be a plus. Thank you and have a nice day!

  15. I have to agree with the people against this site. If no one was polishing there tool every now and then then we would have more people with medical problems, more rape and more unwanted pregnancies.

      • Ohoho, it’s funny because masturbation is rape of self! That is a very nice-looking joke you have there! At least, I hope it is a joke, and not a result of inbreeding….

  16. I’m going to find whoever is behind this site, go to your fucking house, and bust the biggest load off on your miserable fucking face you fucking communist. I’m going to fill a god damn pool of semen and drown you in it you scum fuck I have 2 balls and a 6 inch cannon ready to bust a nut all over your pathetic life. End yourself cunt

  17. ill jerk off on all y’all, fucking religious nut jobs, you ever thought that ur all just idiots and masturbation is natural??

  18. Can someone please help me stop masturbating
    I really needz help
    I just want to stick a fucking cow inside me
    Is that bad?

      • The gal wants to stick a fucking cow inside her, and you tell her it’s amazing… and awesome people of this site are psychos? Oh woe, how masturbation rots your mind. Makes me sad, so sad. ūüôĀ

  19. oh no, look at this, a GAY PERSON has touched your dumb little site :3
    you’re welcome <3
    lucifer bless<3

  20. i just came here to read the comments

    jesus people are fucking freaks :> why not end them all …shit nvm gotta wait for the rapture
    GGWP god and not taking the cunts off of earth till then _-_

  21. I do Perceive with my beady and righteous eye, that this page is entitled “Family Fun” yet I see no propagation of anti-self-rape devices such as the “sausage restrictor” or the “Fanny Prison”. Wololololbleyurgggg hngggggggggg, PRAISE!

  22. La peor mierda que he jugado, prefiero masturbarme todo el día y echar el semen en un crucifijo!!

      • Someone speaking another language isn’t “non-normal”. Didn’t you know that Jesus didn’t speak “American” (it’s called English, by the way. American is what a person from America is called, not the language they speak), he spoke Hebrew? And the bible even encourages the learning of “tongues”, or other languages, so you can easier spread the word of your god to those around you, because I’m sure God and Jesus, if either actually even exists, understood the vast diversity of the world which they created and lived in respectively. Also, “masturbationese” isn’t even a thing. Just because someone is foreign doesn’t mean they automatically masturbate. Even though they probably do, because it is totally normal and healthy to do so and that is understood by ever country and culture except yours.

        • I refer to the language spoken in America as American, to differentiate it from the English which is spoken in England.
          There are a couple of differences. For example, in English you have to pronounce every letter in ‘aluminium’, and you talk to people on mobile phones during breaks or while you’re on holiday.
          Also, y’all need to learn to take a joke on a website which is quite obviously a massive parody.

          • so youre saying a person in mexico speaks mexican? also , “ya’ll” isnt part of the “american” language its a slang term…please learn to speak proper “american” on this website

          • @Skyy Fox
            I would say a person in Mexico is speaking Mexican, assuming there are regional differences between the Spanish spoken in Mexico and the Spanish spoken in Spain. I assume such differences exist, and that I would be very particular about them if I was Mexican, or Spanish. And I suspect you realise why I used a slang term in my comment, so I won’t go on about it.

  23. This website is ridiculous. Just one more example of Christian delusion and insanity. I really hope this whole website is a joke, but if it’s not I pity all of you crazy people that actually listen to a website called “”

  24. This is amazing and my simple minded daughter, Clara, has been burning the calories by playing these games for the last few days.

    She like to pray to God before playing and when she gets an answer right we thank The Lord together for his daily blessings.

    God Bless you Brother Lonnie for giving us this fun family entertainment!

  25. The holy Writings of the Church of Ponginae

    We are very proud to announce the inception and establishment of the Holy Church of Ponginae. We have established this church in response to the overwhelming interest in theological belief in the United States of America.

    Our intent is to offer an alternative religion to the established dominance of current theologies. The Holy Church of Ponginae’s sole intent is to discredit and openly ridicule ALL existing theological beliefs and religious institutions…including the Holy Church of Ponginae. Parishioners and practitioners of the Holy Church of Ponginae are strongly encouraged to actively deride and discredit any and all religious evangelistic efforts.

    The Holy Church of Ponginae was conceived of on April 1st, 2014 in a small house in the mountains, west of Conifer, Colorado. It began after an afternoon of heavy consumption of Alcoholic beverages, food and cannabis. An epiphany was realized by its founders while evaluating numerous documentaries and videos on religion, atheism and agnosticism. It was decided that evening, people needed an alternative to established religions, and a methodology and opportunity to openly parody and mock them.

    For the next two weeks, the council of Gigantopithicus convened daily to establish the foundation of the Holy Church of Ponginae, whilst imbibing mass quantities of alcohol, food and cannabis. Through the intoxicated debates of the council, many issues and disagreements were resolved, and a consensus was finally reached on its core beliefs, canonical texts, dogma and rituals.

    The following is an explanation of the Holy Church of Ponginae, and its respective rituals, beliefs, canonical texts, scriptures, dogmas, and deities.
    The primary deity of the Holy Church of Ponginae is Pongo the Gigantic. Pongo the Gigantic is described as an immortal being, who has chosen the form of an eleven foot tall, male, completely hairless Sumatran Orangutan. He is an ethereal being by nature and possesses omnipotence and infinite supernatural powers, and has been in existence before the beginning of time, space and the universe.

    Pongo the Gigantic is the deity responsible for our known universe, having farted it into existence‚Ķotherwise known as the ‚ÄúBig Bang‚ÄĚ. As referenced in one of the Canonical documents of the Holy Church of Ponginae, Douglas Adams‚Äôs The Restaurant at the end of the universe.
    ‚ÄúIn the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.‚ÄĚ

    Pongo the Gigantic does inhabit the earth in physical form, and currently resides in a neon pink double-wide prefabricated home (commonly referred to as a ‚Äúmobile home‚ÄĚ or ‚Äútrailer‚ÄĚ), and moves around the United States of America at random intervals. He currently resides in a small trailer park on the outskirts of Yazoo City, Mississippi, however is planning to move ‚Äúsomewhere else in the near future‚ÄĚ.

    Further descriptions of Pongo the Gigantic include his ability to exhale superheated plasma and fire at will, consumes a diet of various fruits (especially cherimoyas), aborted Water Buffalo fetuses, hallucinogenic funguses, cacti and toads, gastropods, and various cephalopods. He regularly defecates Hostess Brand Ding Dongs and urinates the Swiss alcoholic spirit Absinthe.
    As an immortal being endowed with omnipotence and infinite supernatural abilities, there are far too many descriptions to be mentioned here. Therefore anything that defies scientific explanation is automatically ascribed to Pongo the Gigantic.

    Pongo the Gigantic has provided humanity with a list of rules which must be indiscriminately and fanatically adhered to, and indiscriminately inflicted upon others by all of his subjects. They are all tattooed on Pongo the Gigantic’s immense scrotum and buttocks, they are as follows;

    Rule 1: I am the creator of all…I am your god…all gods are complete bullshit and false prophets!

    Rule 2: All must make crudely constructed images of me, worshipped upon and adorned with offerings of condiments, bizarre fruits, and anything else that is going bad in the refrigerator.

    Rule 3: Observe the holy Sabbath of Thursday afternoon, from 2:27 p.m. to 4:52 p.m. without fail, by continuing what you’re already doing at the time.

    Rule 4: Curse my name whenever possible, especially when agitated, injured, offended or it just seems like the right thing to say in the moment.

    Rule 5: Do not kill…unless you have a REALLY, REALLY, REALLY good reason, and if you must kill…do so in my name and insist I spoke directly to you, and commanded you to do so.

    Rule 6: Engage in sexual intercourse with anyone or anything willing, as frequently as possible…if unable to do so, repeated daily masturbation is mandatory.

    Rule 7: Do not steal…except from the obscenely wealthy, any multi-national corporation, politicians, political groups, or other churches and religious institutions.

    Rule 8: Want everything…desire what you cannot have and obsess over it endlessly. Lust after people you cannot have and be envious of others that possess what you do not.

    Rule 9: Always be honest and faithful…unless it’s going to get you into trouble, then utilize falsehoods, denial and shamelessly blame others.

    Rule 10: All felines must be hairless…a shaven pussy is beautiful.

    Rule 11: Ridicule, parody, satirize and misrepresent any and all theologies, religions and creeds…including the Holy Church of Ponginae. Utilize vicious and ruthless tactics whenever and wherever possible, and never apologize for doing so.

    Rule 12: Consume anything and everything you wish…gluttony is good. Sugar, caffeine, meat, cephalopods, gastropods, insects, crustaceans, alcohol, hallucinogens and other mind-altering substances are sacred foods and are to be eaten regularly…or whenever desired.

    Rule 13: Lethargy and indolence is encouraged whenever possible.

    Rule 14: Rage and be wrathful against all those you believe to deserve spite and revenge.

    Rule 15: Be arrogant and vain…narcissism and conceit is essential for unjustifiable self-worth…the universe revolves around you, and you alone.

    Rule 16: Donation of money to the Holy Church of Ponginae is not necessary or required, but encouraged…any money donated will be used for whatever is needed or wanted, and there shall be no accounting of church money whatsoever.

    Rule 17: Keep the kitchen and toilet as a holy place of worship, to perform acts of devotion, veneration, and religious study…for this is where all shit begins and ends.
    Time spent defecating is considered penance for transgressions against Pongo the Gigantic.

    Rule 18: Practitioners are required to evangelize the teachings of the Holy Church of Ponginae at every opportunity, by going to crowded public places and uttering obscenities at other religious evangelists or random individuals, do so as loudly and obnoxiously as possible, accompanied by inappropriate and offensive gestures.

    Rule 19: All rules of the Church of Ponginae are strictly voluntary and completely unenforceable…especially when inconvenient, inappropriate or burdensome.

    Failure to adhere to these rules will result in terrible punishment. Any who willfully break these rules will be force-fed hallucinogens, sent to the nearest economically depressed, violent crime riddled city or state, and flagellated with ridiculously named vegetation, by equally bizarrely titled, naked fictional entities coated in the condiment of choice. The punishment will continue for all of eternity…or until the condemned gets tired of it and is no longer amused…or falls asleep.

    The canonic documents of the Holy Church of Ponginae…

    The complete works of Douglas Adams

    The complete works of Hunter S. Thompson

    The complete works of John Steinbeck

    The complete works of Ayn Rand

    The complete works of William S. Burroughs

    The complete works of Samuel L. Clemens (a.k.a. Mark Twain)

    James Joyce -Finnegan’s Wake

    David Rees -How to Sharpen Pencils

    Luigi Serafini – Codex Seraphinianus

    May Cushman Rice – Electricity in Gynecology
    Gary Greenberg – The Pop-Up Book of Phobias

    Alison Jenkins – The Lost Art of Towel Origami

    Chad Orzel – How to Teach Physics to Your Dog

    Carlton Mellick III – The Baby Jesus Butt Plug

    Lawrence Wright – Clean and Decent: The Fascinating History of the Bathroom and Water-Closet

    This is just a preliminary and incomplete list of the canonical documents of the Holy Church of Ponginae. More texts will be added on future dates and as they are discovered.

  26. DONT TAKE YOUR CHILDREN HERE THEY WILL JUST GET HORNY OFF THE BITCH IN HER PANTIES AND JACK OFF AS WELL i swear to all the motherfucking fake-ass christians on this site that the bible says its okay to jack off this website is so fucking fake, my internet security wouldnt let me go on here, FOR REAL??????????

    • The last time I saw a “true Christian” he was driving in the fast lane of the highway, touching his sin-zone. Which explains the “jesus on board” bumper sticker. From what I can tell “jesus on board” means, I will touch my siln-zone while I’m driving, no matter if I cut someone off or just drive slow. It also means while this said Christian will show his middle finger as a result of him masterbating at yet another red light. Might want to talk to your church about removing the “jesus fish” from all the car’s before you touch Your sin zones in public.

  27. Do you know what sort of family fun I like to engage in?

    Mastrubating with my family! Me.. The kids.. Grandma…all sat in a circle on the kitchen floor choking the chicken/scrubbing the carpet.

    Hail satan!

    • Last time I checked that would make you “sciencetologist” Did your kids also make love to each other? Maybe you should be proud that incest runs so ramped in your family! praise on high!

  28. I may now let my same race spouse on the internet now,as I never knew these holy netsites existed…Praise.

    • “i may now let my same race spouse on the internet now” just by reading that sentence fragment alone , i can tell some things about you;
      +You treat women as objects rather than an actual person
      + By using the words “i may now” it is as if youre saying you are your spouces master..which therefore makes it slavery as seeing master is above… Although in the bible it says slavery is okay, there are laws against it.. Fuck we even had a civil war about it
      +”holy netsite” many of these the things on this site arent holy; for ex: 1). nightly finger sniff to check for self rape, that page right there pretty much tells you how to molest your child 2). anti-masturbation cross is child abuse as seeing the child has no way to get out them selves, and by doing it while you’re not at home, the child is unable to eat or do bodily functions …

  29. Praise!! Our good lord jesus has just brought me to the answer for sex addiction and chronic masturbation problem.
    My Story: It all started at a young age. I liked to touch myself. One thing led to another and i didn’t find christ, and became a crack addict and a low payed prostitute.
    This site has inspired me to find god!!! hallelujah!!!Praise!!!!

  30. Are you sure a PUZZLE is the best way to spread the values of stopping self-rape? Trying to fit the male parts of the pieces into the female parts of the other pieces got me all heated down there. I needed to stop and pray, and the good lord saved me from the devil’s suggestion of self-rape. I highly recommend you remove this sinful game before other people are led into temptation.

  31. How is the matching game hard??? are you joking me?? Masturbation is healthy for you!!! Then you’ll know what you want when you really have sex, that’s why you do it…. stop shoving shit down peoples throats. God will love you even if your hand is in your pants…i mean he loves you when its in your nose.

  32. Come here you fucktards! Come on, show your face and let me slap it hard! Show me your penis and vaginas so I can stick red-hot pins into them. You fuck faced retards! I would beat all you cult followers to a pulp. There is no room for your wholly pointless ramblings in an intelligent world. The fact that you believe this nonsense shows you to be irrational and clearly insane. You are nothing but oxygen thieves. Global warming is a direct result of you breathing our air and exhaling a putrid stink so fundamentally obnoxious it makes me want to rip out your lungs and shit in them. The hole in the ozone manifested itself the second you started breathing, and will not go away until I ram my fist down your throat, clasp your genitals and tear your innards out of your pathetic excuse for a human body.

    Now go and finger fuck yourselves you weasley little cunt-fucks. When you die, and if there is a god, he will laugh in your face before pissing on it and sending you down to a hellish existence where you will be forced to spank the monkey and poke the hole for all of eternity.

    I suspect you were all beaten as children and your fathers liked to put their penises in your mouths. You no doubt do the same to your own kids prior to brainwashing them with your putrid stink breath.

    Now who wants to square up and go toe-to-toe? Come on you fucktards! I am so ready for some serious face slapping. I am ready to fuck you up so badly it is actually making me want to cum with excitement. Come on fuck turds, show some holy spirit and come pray before me. Kneel in front of me as I tug my pole. Taste my cum in your mouth and give me that halleluiah moment you all get off on so much. Any takers? Pussy cunts? Not wanting a lesson in reality? I didnt think so, youre obviously too busy getting fisted by an old man to want to face the reality of your cunt induced fuckwit notions.

    Anyway, I will be happy in the knowledge that once you are dead and rotting and burning in eternal hell, you will be lost and forgotten to the human race, never to be mentioned again and your cult will die a pointless death with a legacy usually reserved for kiddie fiddlers. Your own parents will rejoice in your deadness and your kids will squeal with joy that you are now nothing but a corpse with fingers that stink of their shit.

    And when you do die, horrifically with a red-hot poker up your arse, the rest of the world will gather around your grave, pull down their pants and take a big collective shit on your coffin. And god will look down and smile, content in the knowledge that once again satan has been shat on from a great height.

    You stupid fucktards.

    Now, where is that picture of the chick in her underwear? I want to cum all over her panties.

  33. How can you people even think that your bodies can be part of your words known as a “sin zone” it makes me sick.. You all really believe that because someone puts their hands on their own body that its a sin? You all dont have the slightest clue what god is all about, and i honestly am sorry for you all. And for the parents actually playing this game with their kids, i cant even imagine how horrible it would be, let the kids do something else other than play a game where you try and find words like “nofap” or “sin stick” honestly this site has to be some sort of a troll. Humanity is so fucked up because you people make up your own belief system and dont focus on what is really important in life, if someone wants to maturbate let them! They are not going to die from it! Please delete this horrible site. Humans can make their own choices to live life happily and dont need you brainless sheep to change that

  34. I’m laughing so hard that I might lose my job over this shit! Oh well I’m going to go to the men’s room and rub one out come back to my desk and try to make it through the rest of the day. Pray for me and please come help me rub out another!

  35. Wait can’t we get the police to delete this site since it spreads false information and libel?

  36. This holy netsite spreads the truth. I suggest you pick up a King Lonald Holy Bilble and educate your mind, that is, if it’s not too corrupted from years of self-rape and depravity.

  37. This page is very disrespectful to my religion. I have not seen a thing on here about respecting shrek, and in fact, it’s doing the opposite of respect. It’s telling people not to masturbate? Shrek is all about that funky shit, man. Blaze don’t praise. Live the shrek life. Join me my friends, your kids will love it.
    Shrek is love, shrek is life.

  38. With all due respect to Christians, why do you call the penis or vagina ‘Sin zone’ instead of just penis or vagina?

  39. Jesus did not die for our sins just for this to happen- this isn’t religion, it’s a damned cult. Normal Christians like me think this is hilariously sad

  40. This website cannot possibly be serious; it’s sole purpose is to be a troll magnet. True Christians would be explaining who Christ truly was and encourage people to believe and follow His precepts. Once a person understands Christ, studies His Word and has it written in their heart, the Holy Spirit will guide you to what’s right and wrong. Self raping restraints; come on now!!! I regret that I have wasted precious moments of the gift of life reading this stupidity.

  41. You people are doing terrific work, spreading a positive message across the World Wideweb. It was only once I had both of my hands surgically removed by a retired veterinarian that I was able to stop my own cycle of sinning. I’m typing this with my nose and it’s starting to bleed a little.

  42. Truffle, I am so impressed that you practice the ancient art of cat milking. I have 2 cats, have tried to milk them, but it was a miserable failure. After I recovered from my wounds, I just put all my “gear” up for sale on Craigs’ list. I credit cats’ milk for curing my arthritis.

    It is heart-warming to read prayers from a lesser-gendered, who seems to know her place. Thank you for the milk that has given me a new lease on life.

  43. Women are not a lesser gender. Don’t let religion make you think that you aren’t as good as men. Men are masturbators and disgusting ones at that.

    • What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you anti-masturbator? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Masturbation Club, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret butt raids, and I have over 300 confirmed faps. I am trained in self-raping and I’m the top cum shooter in the entire club. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of fingers across my right hand and my dick is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing I call my jizz. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can masturbate anywhere, anytime, and I can jizz on you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in self-rape, but I have access to the entire arsenal of lotion and I will use it to its full extent to jack-off my miserable balls onto your face, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue and whacked your dick off. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will cum fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

  44. I have read “sin zone” so many times in reading this, hilarious, comment section. I would just like you to type what these “sin zones are actually called so I can follow. You only have two hands, but you have more than two sin zones.

    Here are a few to get you started ūüėÄ
    -left boob/breast
    -right boob/breast
    -butt/rear end/ass/behind

    I understand that ignorance is bliss, but maybe if you learned something about your body, for once, you could probably make sense when talking to the rest of the continent that already does. (most of the time)

  45. These fantastic and well thought games really have helped me getting others to see towards the light of our holy Jesus. It warms my heart to know that these people no longer will commit sins like self-rape again.

  46. people like you all need to be… Rubbed out
    all of these people are huge… jerks
    you people are… ass holes
    you talk a lot about how masturbation sucks and how being gay sucks but all of you people are jerking yourselves off with the delusions of grandeur through jesus

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