Mother Milk, A Good Start For Your Child?

We all know eating the wrong food has many unhealthy side effects, like heart disease and cancer.  But no one knew indulging the wrong foods also ensures one will surrender quickly to the sinful pleasures of masturbation. The earlier a child eats the wrong foods, the more harmful consequences in the longer term will be.

Recent research from B.L.U.F.F. University BLUFF, Department of Food Technology, has shown how harmful mother milk can be for young children, despite claims by doctors who are obviously paid by the liberal media.

A child sucking at the breast of the mother not only allows the mother to experience an orgasm-like sensation, but the child in question develops  measurable psychological damage. The child will develop a clear preference for phallus-shaped vegetables, like cucumbers, carrots and eggplant. This also explains the addiction of some children to strawberries and chocolate. Strawberries are known to have an arousing effect on humans. They are called the fruit nipples of Venus for a reason. Chocolate will cause sexual excitement and euphoria, due to increased production of endorphins and serotonin.

The propensity to make bad friends and inject weed is characteristic for children who have been the victims of breast milk squirting mothers. The effects on long term are very alarming, if nobody intervenes. Boys will eventually get infected by homogay disease. Girls will derail quicker and allow their sin caves to be exploited; they will offer themselves to any man who happens to come along. This effect can be counteracted, as was also evident from the studies. When a child has been breastfed, a strict Christian diet is necessary. Quick intervention with intensive treatment of cat milk, bear meat and cumin in Lonnie approved dishes, show that the psychological symptoms can reduce by 90%.

Continuing complaints will require intensive behavioural treatment.

About Regina Newborn 1 Article
Born and raised in Bucharest, Romania, in 1995 Regina Newborn moved to Phoenix (AZ) to start a career as a hostess in a men-only establishment. In 1997, she met Lonnie Child and soon she settled in the woman's home at Safford campus. She graduated in Food Technology in 2004. Ever since she is Head Pastry, teacher at B.L.U.F.F and Lonnie Childs personal chef. She is known to bake delicious Lonniecakes.

9 Comments on Mother Milk, A Good Start For Your Child?

    • Breast milk is healthy simply because it was simply designed for the baby, quite literally the molecular formula for that milk was created based in the baby intended for. Also the milk can just be out into bottles. For most women the sensation of the baby doing this is uncomfortable because the baby isn’t pleasuring her or even knows, he is simply squeezing to extract milk.

      • Utterly preposterous! It’s the gift of the Devil, that encourages incest and paedophilia.

        Wake up masturbator! Don’t believe the lies the LIEberal media feed you!!

  1. You seem to be avoiding the fact that it is healthy for a child, this milk is quite healthy for you because of reasons stated above. Also I don’t think you realized that this is also what almost all other mammals do, applying this to us as humans is essentially saying that it is bad for these other mammals, anyways you have a very strong faith in Jesus and his word. May you be blessed, I was simply applying the observable science of some of these matters, have a good day (or night depending on where you live).

  2. Is this Website actually real…have I dream’t it up, as it honestly seem to silly to be a serious ,

  3. The site hilarious! ! Breastfeeding unhealthy?? How can it be when it’s been proven to be the best you can your child. If it was so wrong Wtf would God make it possible for women to lactate? Oh oh also formula wasn’t around thousands of years ago so please tell me how all the former ancestors of this earth survived without their mothers milk?? By drinking milk from another animals nipple? Maybe if you preached less about what God created us naturally with & put more effort into say actual real world problems you would get further in life!! This site is truly fucked up & stupid.

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