Brother Lonald “Lonnie” Childs has long been a pioneer in race relations through his compassionate programs to institute White privilege for all through prayer and free skin bleaching procedures. As such Brother Lonnie has seen a disturbing rise of intolerance that he has decided to combat. With recent efforts by intolerant White LIEberals to erase Teepee Indians from our culture by renaming the Washington Redskins, Brother Lonnie has decided it is time for America to own up to it’s treatment of our red skinned brothers and sisters and has announced that he as a White American male forgives the savages for being selfish with their land and not wanting to share with the White man. For far too long White Americans have held onto the grudge against the Teepee Indians for being so selfish but Brother Lonnie with his enlightened belief system feels it is time to let go of our rightful anger and finally forgive the Teepee Indians. We as a nation will be better off for it and since making his announcement, hundreds of letters have poured in from grateful savages wishing to apologize in person and take the STOP Masturbation NOW pledge of self-celibacy.
The full text of Brother Lonnie’s statement below.
“My fellow White Americans…as much as it pains me to say this, our country has committed some sins and one of our greatest sins is against the savage Teepee Indians. All decent White Americans wanted was to share this great land with the red man, but selfishly they wanted keep the White race out of their hippie compounds which were rife with masturbation, hemp bonging and the worship of false Gods. The Teepee Indians fought hard to keep White Americans out and killed many women and children while doing so. Understandably we have since held a grudge against the savages that has poisoned our soul as a nation. However when I saw White LIEberals attempting to rename the Washington Redskins in an effort to erase the Teepee Indians from our superior culture I knew I must lead the way to understanding between our people. So I would like to take this time to announce that I, Lonald “Lonnie” Childs as a White American Male forgive the Teepee Indians for being selfish with their land and their racist attitudes towards the White man. Let the healing begin.
God bless some of you.
Lonald “Lonnie” Childs