Lonnie Childs Proudly Opens “The Tempura Center For Women.”

Mayor of Safford and two local masturbation victims proudly open The Tempura Center

Safford, Arizona: Local philanthropist and leader of SMN Ministries, Lonnie Childs, has finished construction of The Tempura Center for Women.

SMN spokesman, August Weitz, spoke on behalf of Lonnie Childs when addressing the press today. “All too often, Masturbation takes the form of Rage and Violence, known to all of us as: MasturRage. This is similar to Roid-Rage, where too much free-roaming testosterone is present in the body, due to chronic masturbation.” Mr. Weitz went on to say, “Unfortunately, MasturRage adversely affects those who are closest to the Masturbator, usually women and children. We built this place to be a place of sin-free healing and security, far from the reach of the victim’s abuser.”

The Tempura Center will provide food and shelter for victims, as well as offer grief counseling, self-defense classes and masturbation avoidance workshops. Unlike the current facility in Safford that treats battered women, The Tempura Center will focus on lightly-battered women.

About Liam McKey 44 Articles
Liam McKey is a former combat veteran and owner of the only Vegan-Certified ranch in the United States. He has two normal teenage children with his same-race wife. Liam is active in the community of Safford, Arizona where he lives. Mr. McKey is an expert on teenage masturbation addiction and has many degrees from various non-accredited faith-based colleges.
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