Wisconsin Religious Pig-Beating Stopped by Gay Liberals. B.L.U.F.F Welcomes Parish To Campound

The Good Samaritans of Hortonville WI.

Hortonville WI/ Safford AZ (SMNNN)

The annual Beat Pigs For Jesus Festival in Hortonville, Wisconsin, has been cancelled, no doubt because of pressure from liberal atheist gays.

The festival, a long standing holy-ceremony, in which faithful Normals beat the life from disgusting pigs, was protested by known liberal homogay beastophilia advocates P.E.T.A. The perverts at P.E.T.A claimed they festival was cruel. SMN Ministries disagrees, says B.L.U.F.F. Ham Steward James Lamb, ” No, it’s fine, religious even. Pigs don’t have feelings. Unless being delicious is a feeling. Praise! ”

Brother Lonnie Childs has opened the campound of B.L.U.F.F Arizona to the faithful Normals of Hortonville, and will allow the Beat Pigs For Jesus Festival to continue, undeterred by liberal animal-sexers.

Said Lonnie Childs. ” It’s a good thing these people do. I like bacon. Praise. “

About Thomas Kelly 62 Articles
Thomas Kelly, SMN Faithscience Editor, is the Dean of several B.L.U.F.F's, as well as the preeminent authority on Faithscience. In addition these lofty titles, he is also a powerful wizard, and holds over fifty non-secular PHDs.

13 Comments on Wisconsin Religious Pig-Beating Stopped by Gay Liberals. B.L.U.F.F Welcomes Parish To Campound

  1. NOTE: We do accommodate our vegetarian students at the B.L.U.F.F. Cafeteria on Monsanto Mondays, a sponsored lunch event that takes place every week.

  2. This is so beyond backwards. Christians can be so blind and ignorant. Pigs have cognitive abilities beyond those of four year old HUMAN children. So it’s okay to beat four year olds for Jesus? Great religion you got there, dumb fucks. THESE will be the ones burning in hell after death under the rule of a most just god.

    • Thank you for your questions.
      firstly, we only consider it acceptable to beat a four year old for Jesus under exceptional circumstances of extreme disobedience; in general we favour a course of gentle restraint and parental observation to rein in their baser urges.
      secondly, no, we do not consider pigs to be HUMAN’s.
      I hope that helps you with your childrearing problems. Praise!

    • The tradition of the “Pig Beat for Jesus” is long standing , good for family values and community bonding and has roots dating back to the colonial era. A real American Original. That is probley why the Liberals are fixing to stop it. you don’t believe me look it up, its in all the news.

  3. Wow sick bastards. I will be happy to lay a beating on everyone of you that harms those animals. You are by far the most vile and disgusting people I have ever heard about. Maybe knocking a few of your teeth out and cracking your skulls would help you see yhe light. Sick moronic bastards if I believed in god I would hope he would roshambo you when you reach your pearly gates. You people are not human your not even animals your just filth.

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