FaithFacts Researcher: Facebook Big Masturbation Funded Study Breached Ethical Guidelines

Mark Zuckerberg, Satatnic Masturbationist

By: TheRev Leroy Jenkins

Over the weekend, the sewage pipes exploded due to the massive influx of semen that overloaded sanitary systems worldwide, due to the fact that Facebook had conducted psychological pro masturbation experiments on user news feeds. While Zuckerberg’s team doesn’t see a problem with that it did, FaithFact researchers seem think it breached ethical Stop Masturbation Now ethical research guidelines.

James Grindsamann, professor of law at the University of Maryland, has written an extensive blog post about the experiments. He points out that Facebook claims everything is OK because “[the study] was consistent with Facebook’s Data Use Policy, to which all users agree prior to creating an account on Facebook, constituting informed consent for this (Masturbation) research.”

Since, Facebook has added that the “research was conducted for a single week in 2012 and none of the data used was associated with a specific person’s Facebook account, but targeted masses to cause them to Self-Rape. ” Again, it suggests that this makes everything OK.

But Grindsamann claims that isn’t really the point. Indeed, he points out that the subjects of the experiment didn’t give informed consent—and Federal law requires informed consent on such studies. Not just that, he also claims that the study harmed participants:

This… was not an observational study. It was an experimental study—indeed, a randomized controlled trial—in which participants were subliminally coerced to masturbate. We wouldn’t tell patients in a drug trial that the study was harmless because only a computer would ever know whether they received the placebo. The unwitting participants in the Facebook study were told (seemingly by their friends) for a week either that the world was a dark and cheerless place so go ahead and masturbate or that it was a saccharine paradise and only masturbation makes it btter. That’s psychological masturbation manipulation, even when it’s carried out automerotically.

He concludes that “this is bad, even for Facebook… This study is a scandal because it brought Facebook’s troubling Big Masturbation practices into a realm—academia—where we still have standards of treating people with dignity and serving the common good.” And there, right there, is why all the weekend’s fuss over a single Big Masturbation study is entirely deserved.

TheRev Leory Jenkins is a Sr, Staff Writer for BLUFF Press, LLC.

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About TheRev Leroy Jenkins 36 Articles
TheRev Leroy Jenkins was born the oldest of 13 children in a small farm town of Sweet Apple, Oh. While on the farm he learned to fear god, a woman's place is in the kitchen, a mans place is to be the head of the household, and masturbation is a sin. At 18 TheRev left his small town and moved to Seattle to attend college, while there he was tempted by some filthy pot-weed injecting hippies to try masturbations, this led to a downward spiral of ellis dee bong hits, pot weed injections, listening to Milli Vanilli, and holding a sign saying "Will self rape for McNuggets." He was at his lowest point in his life when he was saved by Lonnie Childs of the Stop Masturbation Now church, Lonnie took him in, bathed him in his Holy Golden Shower of Truth, and educated him in FaithFacts™ and Brother Lonnie's University of FaithFacts™ in Stafford, AZ. TheRev was an avid student and earned his PHD of FaithFacts™ from B.L.U.FF and was sent out on a Mission to spread Lonnie's word to heathen Amish-Mexicans in rural Ohio. TheRev now resides in Ohio and runs the Ohio B.L.U.FF campus in Homersville, Oh with his 5 Same Race Assigned Spouses and his 23 Normal children. Brother Leroy is Senior Staff writer for B.L.U.FF Press LLC. In 2011 TheRev was awarded The Pulitzer Prize and Edward G. Murrow Award for his in depth expose' on the Myth of the Female Orgasm.
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5 Comments on FaithFacts Researcher: Facebook Big Masturbation Funded Study Breached Ethical Guidelines

  1. Facebook recently purchased a maker of virtual reality hardware known as Oculus Rift. My heart is truly terrified about what an unethical pro-masturbater organisation like facebook could unleash when they combine their self-rape agenda with such technology! 🙁

    Lonnie save us if they succeed in their mad endeavour!

  2. Recently Scientists have discovered a new Auto Immune Disease that affects people with extremely high metabolism that causes their body to destroy itself if it doesn’t receive sexual satisfaction on a daily basis. Thus this can be used in a Court of Law as a disease that forces one to rape, and can also be used as a defense to seeking a prostitute. If you Lonnie Childs try to make masturbation illegal then you would be condemning these people to death, thus you would become a murderer, and as we saw with Jack Kavorkian helping someone to kill themselves or giving them the means to kill themselves or taking the items away that can save their lives can and will be held in a court of law as murder.

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