Author: Cassidy Pen
Cornelius Bartholomew “Cassidy” Pen, a retired US Marine, Actor, and Security Head-Receiver at B.L.U.F.F. Female Intake, now writes for a number of nationally respected news agencies. A winner of the prestigious Bill O'Reily "No-Spin" Award, Cassidy also runs a daytime street ministry to save souls from the sin of self rape. An avid hunter and manufacturer of distilled spirits, Cassidy would probably be found deep in the woods during his free time.
Amazing news! Brother Cassidy – 1, Big Masturbation – 0.
This isn’t even news
Of course it’s not news for you, heathen. That is until you try to stuff a sandpapered screwdriver handle up your sphincter. Then you’ll understand…HA HAH HAAaa
Why would I do that?
We are the Borg. We will assimilate those who support this website. Resistance is futile. Lower your shields and surrender.
I ain’t afraid of no Borg. Praise!
Fear is irrelevant. Preparation is irrelevant. Your technology and culture will service us.
We are the mockbots durpa durpa durpa! Faith shield activated!
We are the mockbots, we will banish aggressors to the pits of triple hell, long live the resistance! Faithshield activated!
Praise!
“we are the mockbots, we will never surrender. People who support this site will never die. Prepare to be mocked.”
The Collective isn’t immortal, and neither are you. You will all die.
The collective blah blah blah.
You will be assimilated just like the Delta Quadrant.
“we are the mockbots, durdurdur.”
HAIL TO THE SOVIET UNION