Net Neutrality: What Big Masturbation Doesn’t Want You To Know

"Big Masturbation cares only about their slaves being able to access pornography for free and in the highest possible quality."

image source: Free Digital Photos By Stuart Miles, published on 11 April 2012 Stock Image - image ID: 10079656
(image source: Free Digital Photos By Stuart Miles, published on 26 August 2011 Stock Photo - image ID: 10055366)
(image source: Free Digital Photos By Stuart Miles, published on 26 August 2011
Stock Photo – image ID: 10055366)

WEST PALM BEACH, FL — (SMNNN) The future of the new technology, known colloquially as “the internet”, is a topic that has gotten a lot of traction lately in both the mainstream media as well as the seedy underbelly of the “‘information superhighway”. Unfortunately, no other netsite has written about the horrible side effect of the plan to allow internet providers to allow a ‘fast lane’ to content due to back alley deals between the service provider and content provider.

Whenever the net neutrality issue is discussed, they use examples like “AT&T making a deal with MySpace to allow AT&T subscribers to access the amazing content available at MySpace significantly faster”. Thus, the “billions of MySpace users who try to access MySpace by way of Comcast, Earthlink or even AOL will get a much slower experience”. Looking at that scenario logically, one sees the dilemma, however the issue goes much deeper than that.

Sources close to the FCC have stated that there is a Big Masturbation angle to the current plans to derail net neutrality. My anonymous source stated, “It’s all a smoke screen. They’re trying to get people to believe this will make their episodes of The Golden Girls show up in HD on Netflix, when this is really a power play for Big Masturbation to get an unstoppable pipeline redirected to serve up non-stop pornography. Big Masturbation cares only about their slaves being able to access pornography for free and in the highest possible quality.”

When that angle is considered, one can see that Big Masturbation puppets in government could easily back legislation to allow the precedent of a ‘fast lane’ for video. Then they could turn around and strong arm the internet providers into deals with Big Masturbation owned and controlled pornography netsites to force those sites onto the ‘fast lane’. My source stopped short of saying that Big Masturbation has infiltrated the FCC itself, but gave me an odd wink and looked away quickly when I asked that question. It was a windy day so perhaps it was just something in their eye. Or maybe not.

Obviously if this Big Masturbation funded and created ‘fast lane to pornography’ is established, it will make the task of Lonnie Childs and the Stop Masturbation Now movement that much harder. And who is to say that they won’t just force wonderful netsites such as StopMasturbationNow.org into the ‘slow lane’ or use “netspace filtering” to block the netsite from the world wide web completely. The implications chill my spine. Can you imagine a world where any child with a fax modem can see extremely high quality pornographic depravity just by pushing a few buttons?

Let’s all activate our prayer apps (while we still can) and pray that Lonnie can stave off this assault by Big Masturbation before it is too late.

Praise.


Cathy Redmond, reporting for StopMasturbationNow.org.

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About Cathy Redmond 104 Articles
Cathy Redmond is a graduate of University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire, earning degrees in English and Political Science. She likes long walks in the desert, strong Conservative leadership and America.

1 Comment on Net Neutrality: What Big Masturbation Doesn’t Want You To Know

  1. I prefer masturbating me with interesting readings, specially well written porn material.

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