Death / Foreigners / Science / Supernatural Disaster / Weather / World

Siberian Village Lost Due To Asian Masturbation’s Impact On Global Environment

SIBERIA- COMMUNIST U.S.S.R C.C.C.P (SMNNN)

An entire village in Siberia has been swallowed into a huge crater, and masturbation is definitely the cause, leading Faithscientists say.

Leading Faithclimatetologist, Dr Skippy Enis, recently involved in an atomic meltdown explosion at B.L.U.F.F Graphcenter , and fresh from life saving surgery, explains the situation in a phone interview from the recovery room of St. Lonald Hospital: ” Huh? Y’all here again? Y’all have homes? Seriously, do y’all ever go home? ” Said Dr Enis. ” Oh yeah, that big ol’ snow-hole. yeah. Masturbation. Yes. Can I go to sleep now? ”

Faithscientists at B.L.U.F.F. and The Foundation For A Better Tomorrow have sent drones to the hole and found it to be composed of mostly ice and mud, ruling out a meteor, or incendiary Communist Death-Ray. Leading researchers at both institutions agree the village of Ygmahiltusk simply melted into the ground, killing an entire tribe of savage primitives. It appears, that a mere two degree increase in the area’s annual temperature, caused the permafrost the backwards savages built their settlement upon, to simply melt, and become swallowed by the Earth.

Well, TBH, building your Wigwams on ice was pretty stupid...

Well, TBH, building your Wigwams on ice was pretty stupid…

B.L.U.F.F researchers have concluded this is 89% likely to have been caused by increases in Pacific Ocean temperature, caused by the over 9000 billion gallons of semen dumped annually into the ocean, by the country of Japan.

The government of Japan has refused all attempts at interviews, and refuses to give a statement, leading to the only rational conclusion: It is their fault because they are a nation of Earth-hating Masturbators.

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augustweisz
Admin

Asians do hate the planet!

Truffle
Member

In Soviet Russia… masturbation kill’s you!

Faithgasming
Guest
Faithgasming

But Truffle, masturbation will kill no matter where it is committed. We need to stop the self rapers before something like this hit closer to home.

Truffle
Member

So true, Brother Faithgasming. I was feeling a little hormonal when I dispatched the comment, without thinking. Typical lesser gendered. I will take my leave to the menstrual hut.

Lonnie Bless you!

Faithgasming
Guest
Faithgasming

And Truffle is that a kitty milking device I see in your picture?

Truffle
Member

It certainly is, Brother. I am Director of Cat Milking Facilities – BLUFF. That is my top milking cat, Buffy. She can churn out 1 1/2 gallons on a good day.

Faithgasming
Guest
Faithgasming

I would be very interested in visiting your cat milking facilities as we have a lot of cats on my farm that we milk. Praise to you and all at the facility!

Eriska degai
Guest

Did I catch a masterbater? ou’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! You and the stranger both like roleplay. You: Hi Stranger: dude here You: 23 F Russia Stranger: oh hi! Lou here, 29 You: Nice Stranger: what,s your name, love? You: Eriska Stranger: Sexy! You: Thank you You: This is me by the way Stranger: oh thank you I was gonna ask, just a sec Stranger: wow, you’re really pretty You: Thank you Stranger: i’ll send you one…what do you want to see? You: I don’t really care to see a picture Stranger: oh ok Stranger: I’m… Read more »

Truffle
Member

What in Gods Holy name is this?

goatscashmere
Guest

I do believe that was cybersex roleplay. People get online to MASTURBATE with one another to RELIEVE STRESS. can be done anonymously or not.

Cathy Redmond
Member

That sinkhole looks like Satan’s sincave. Scary.

Praise.

Faithgasming
Guest
Faithgasming

First pearl harbour know this, what evil depraved thing will these asians commit next? At least it was a bunch of sin loving communists that they killed.

Eriska degai
Guest

comment image.html?filters[tags]=Shine&filters[user]=127166338&sort=1&o=1

Steve Shand
Guest
Steve Shand

Didn’t we have one more A bomb we did not use in world war II ?????

Bono Reznor
Guest
Bono Reznor

The oceans around Japan are hard to navigate because of the high semen content. My father always had to do a ton of repairs and sometimes even use extra fortifications on his ships whenever he had to travel out that way.

Skyy Fox
Guest

omg … the stupid …. its so real

charizo
Guest

i wanna swim in that semen

charizo
Guest

Jesus said that you should enjoy your life and stop worrying
and also whats wrong with you conservative people you are all so ashamed of your body

are you ashamed of what the almighty has given you
be proud of sex and masturbation ,masturbate everyday and every night its part of gods plan have sex everyday and night too its what he had intended

like what use are your reproductive organs if you wont use it

sex is OK as long as you handle it maturely and smartly

Truffle
Member

You are a discustarding pervert! Coition should only be performed for procreation, lasting no more than 3 minutes, in the missionary position – as God intended.

Coition is NOT for fun.
Masturbation is WRONG.
Lesser-gendereds ‘O’ is a MYTH.

Have I made myself clear?

Praying AT you.

goatscashmere
Guest

You can pray AT us all you want. All those “rules” are from the old testament. Back when humans died before they turned 25 in most cases. As soon as your period started you’d be declared a woman and married off. And as a clearly superior FEMALE I can tell you I enjoy sex and masterbation. Sessions with myself and my fiancee are never shorter than 25 minutes, and as a woman I most certainly do orgasm. I cum. I get off. I get up there and ride his cock till we are both spent. Coitus is for fun, not… Read more »

Tom Marr
Guest
Tom Marr

Lets all say 2 snail marys…..we mean well but it takes us a long time getting there….its an age thing. Happy bonking

Dark Mercenary
Guest

My Cuntry Boner wont go down.

TruthTeller
Guest

Oh thank god I thought this was real for a second

ryan
Guest
ryan

Your all stupid as fuck, Your dumb and should seriously seek some mental help, If you suppose this website or any of it’s views your dumb and need to go back to logic school, where you learn basic common fucking sense. The semen dumped from japan fuels the economy because of how much the porn industry brings in, thus allowing for more industries to make us cheaper products because they are doing so well, Enjoy your electronics? stop complaining about masturbation, the 2% degree rise didn’t cause that millions of years of the earth churning caused that big of a… Read more »

Child of Lonnie
Guest
Child of Lonnie

Ryan, your grammar and spelling really suck. One of of the first signs of self rape. What in the hell does semen and electronics have in common? Looked at labels lately? All that shit comes from China. And if millions of years of earth churning caused that sinkhole, why did it happen right now, when more people than ever are stroking their mules? A self sin sinkhole, if I’ve ever seen one.

One Punch Man
Guest
One Punch Man

Okay, the first photo was of a sinkhole, that may even be a mine entrance or something, but is nowhere near big enough to engulf a city. The second photo, was of a chasm or something, that looks like it had been there for years. Keep this bullshit up and I will find you, and I will end you with OOOOOOOOONE PUUUUUUUUNCH!!!!!!!! (3,2,1,Killshot)