Morals / Science / Self-Rape Prevention

The Dangers of Inappropriate Office Boners (I.O.B.) and How to Stop Them!

Have you ever been afflicted by an Inappropriate Office Boner (I.O.B.) at work? It’s an embarrassing condition that can be caused by one of the following three things: too-tight slacks, the tawdry new intern and her suggestive clothing, or thoughts of carpet bombing a foreign nation such as Canada.

The most effective way to rid yourself of the I.O.B. is to discreetly slip off into the men’s room and place a cold spoon on the offending organ. I know it sounds crazy but it works! It’s advisable that you keep a collection of spoons in the office freezer for such occasions.

**CAUTION — UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES SHOULD YOU SUBSTITUTE A SPORK**

Remember that self-rape in the broom closet is NEVER an option. Bless!

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ilikepenisMaster baiterJohn MorganSpaghetti Sunday Recent comment authors
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Spaghetti Sunday
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Spaghetti Sunday

Not funny. Just lame

John Morgan
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John Morgan

This has to be satire, right?!

Master baiter
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Pls tell me this is a joke 💀

ilikepenis
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ilikepenis

NO, YOU SHOULD NOT MASTURBATE AT ALL