Sports

Germany Routs Mexico 7-1

(Stop Masturbation Now)— Germany today routed the Mexican state of Brazil 7-1 in soccer. Germans, using a combination of preserving precious bodily fluids and using only Caucasians proved too much for the very dark skinned Brazilians. At one point in the match Germans scored 4 goals on 10 minutes. A feat unheard of in a sport where the average score is a 0-0 tie.

 

Tears flowed like water in the Estadio Mineirao in Belo Horizonte as before even half-an-hour had gone, Brazil were 5-0 down, and the final scoreline was 7-1, equaling their worst-ever defeat, 6-0 to Uruguay back in 1920 before the World Cup had even begun.

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Cassidy Pen
6 years ago

Germany scored 7, which is common in football. I don’t even know how a football team scores only 1. Do they let them kick the extra point before scoring a touchdown in international football.

Cathy Redmond
6 years ago
Reply to  Cassidy Pen

I think they get one point at the end for participating.

King of Masturbation
6 years ago
Reply to  Cathy Redmond

You fucking dumbass turd burgalur piece of shit, they legitamately got that point from scoring, nigga this is fucking Fifa they don’t give no fucking participating points you dumb ass bitch wtf you stupid hoe life ain’t so fucking rewarding like that participating don’t do shit if you don’t act life isn’t peachy and shit like that. God damn, nigga.

Nikita Shalavin
6 years ago

This is perfect example of what can be accomplished by teamwork of non-masturbating professionals of normal ethnicity.

TheRev Leroy Jenkins
6 years ago

Same Race Normals 7, Non-Normals Masturbationist Race 1. Take that Masturbaters!
God Bless,
TheRev

No.
No.
6 years ago

No it’s not. I’m pretty sure most of them have sex and shit. Not masturbate because they are fucking athletes . Stop being a racist assshole and go get laid you fuck.

No.
No.
6 years ago
Reply to  augustweisz

Yeah I don’t read fucking shit bigotry. I hope you fucking pray at me because I ain’t changing I’m a masturbator and I love it. It’s pleasurable, calming, and lowers my chance of prostate cancer by 30%. So I might even masturbate to you.

Nikita Shalavin
6 years ago
Reply to  No.

Gay.

No.
No.
6 years ago
Reply to  No.

I am pansexual alright.

You fucks don’t know what that is. It’s being able to be attracted to all sexes like male, female, and transsexual, etc.

Liam McKey
6 years ago
Reply to  No.

Pan-Sexualizers are attracted to children. That’s why the term is derived from the well known “Peter Pan Syndrome.”

No.
No.
6 years ago
Reply to  No.

No they fucking aren’t I’m offended! I’m fucking 15 I’m not attracted to 7 year olds.

Fuck off.

Jazz
Jazz
6 years ago

Nikita i think it’s wonderful that you have come out as gay on this site. Praise be to God.

Test
Test
6 years ago

This is test comment

Joseph
Joseph
6 years ago

You guys are the prime example of why religion is terrible. The bible never mentions masturbation. You guys are a bunch of racist asshole. Your religion is stupid, you are also stupid. Fuck you you neo nazis.

Pasty
Pasty
6 years ago
Reply to  Joseph

See Matthew 5:30 you shrieking liberal lunkhead.

“And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.”

Nope not a chance
Nope not a chance
6 years ago

It’s hilarious how Christians think they are so fucking holy I gotta gf and I fap also I’m Germanic trust me Germans fap. It’s funny believe in something that might be true haha. I don’t know who’s more fucked up you guys or the WBBC

Not a chance
Not a chance
6 years ago

And secondly Jesus freaks Germany played Brazil not Mexico you fucks