(StopMasturbationNow)—Masturbation is the number one cause of lying worldwide. From “just a minute” to “it’s good for you” masturbators lie constantly.
Last weekend, professional golfer and PGA tour pro Robert Allenby told police he was kidnapped, assaulted and robbed Friday night after missing the cut at the Sony Open.
On Monday, reports emerged about conflicting details of Allenby’s story, which the Island Mexican disputed. In text messages to the Golf Channel, Allenby speculated that a homeless woman who had described finding him bloodied on a Honolulu street corner was “getting paid” to relay false details to media.
Allenby’s original account said a homeless woman found him in a park 6½ miles away from the restaurant where he had dinner and was reportedly abducted from earlier in the evening.
According to faithscientists and masturbation experts. Masturbators often will slip into a delirious state where the body will spasm when orgasaming. When this happens the body can collide violently with the floor, table or other objects causing bruising or even broken bones.
In Other Golf News…
Tiger Woods lost a tooth this week. A sure sign of osteoporosis due to calcium loss from years of masturbation. Orientals masturbate way more than most, also they are born more fragile and womanlike.