Sports

WWE Releases Shameful Masturbation Fodder Video On YouTube

World Wrestling Entertainment sunk to a new low this weekend when they released a three-minute, forty seconds long video titled “Royal Rumble Match: WWE Royal Rumble 2014”. While on the surface it may appear that this is just the sports entertainment contest named in the title, unfortunately, it is nothing more than the WWE testing the waters to likely release a flood of masturbation fodder on YouTube. The video in question starts out normal enough and then unnecessarily zooms in on the buttocks of the performer Phil “CM Punk” Brooks and begins to run in slow motion. The viewer is then treated to slow motion thrusting and grinding from Brooks’s pelvis region into fellow sports entertainer, Colby “Seth Rollins” Lopez’s pelvis region.

“It is pitiful that pro wrestling is so bad these days they have to reduce themselves to ‘Big Masturbation-styled’ shock tactics to get people to watch their product,” said Brother Abram Nesmith of Brother Lonnie’s University of Faith Facts. “I remember the good ol’ days of pro wrestling when thick men with bushy hair pummeled each other for real to impress their lesser gendered conquests in the crowd. Now it’s a bunch of HomoGay™ pretty boys all shaven and oiled up bumping and grinding on each other. Even worse, they’re always crying and complaining about everything like little girls. It’s disgusting.”

Brother Lonnie has begun a campaign to report the video, and the several mirrored uploads, as “Sexual Content, Child Abuse and Spam or Misleading” on the YouTube video site in the hopes that this kind of smut is not shown to the children of America. You can help Lonnie’s crusade against homoerotic masturbation material existing on YouTube by reporting the “Royal Rumble Match: WWE Royal Rumble 2014” buttocks worship video.

The video in question is embedded below. Brother Lonnie would ask that no lesser gendereds watch this film and only those men who have taken Brother Lonnie’s pledge should watch it for research purposes and to report the video to YouTube.

Lonnie-willing, within minutes the video shown below will no longer be available. If it remains viewable, then Brother Lonnie will have further evidence to prove that both YouTube and WWE are part of the larger conspiracy being perpetuated by Big Masturbation.

DISCLAIMER: DO NOT WATCH UNLESS CLEARED BY LONNIE CHILDS TO DO SO!!!

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eI-0DJoIV7E]

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A Smart Guy
A Smart Guy
5 years ago

I’m pretty sure that’s just 2 guys fighting

Hello
Hello
5 years ago
Reply to  A Smart Guy

I’m pretty sure that it’s two men performing a well rehearsed psychodrama for commercial broadcast purposes.

augustweisz
Admin
5 years ago

I remember George “the animal” Steele. He wasn’t no homo.And if he was hungry he would eat the ring.