“What happened last night? Did I get selfraped? Who do I turn to?” Turn to Christ, young masturbator! Take the STOP Masturbation NOW pledge of self-celibacy today! Praise!
Joe Ferno, of Naples Florida, has filed suit in State Superior Court, claiming that his right to marry himself is being infringed upon by Florida’s antiquated laws that state marriage is between two people. […]
I love taking the Stop Masturbation Now message to the Liberal Bastions of the HomoGay Big Masturbation Institutions of Higher Learning and the Self-Raping Liberal youths enrolled there. Today was an especially good day as […]
(Stop Masturbation NOW)— Obama, probably the most controversial and nefarious creature in history has mysteriously risen to the presidency of the United States of America even without being a US citizen or even showing any […]
Everyone knows that San Francisco is the center of world hedonism as sex in the streets and homogay parades result in traffic jams where rubbernecked citizens are seemingly shocked daily at the carnival of sin […]
WASHINGTON, D.C. (SMMNN) – A study by the U.S. Navy, funded by a Big Masturbation shell corporation think tank, has attempted to sully the good name of stunt flying team the ‘Blue Angels’. Amongst […]
(StopMasturbationNOW)— Wil Wheaton, the controversial actor who was universally disliked in his role as Anakin Skywalker in the Star Wars prequels has given up masturbation. After only three months free of self rape, Wil began […]