Saints Cut Seed Spiller C.J. Spiller

September 14, 2016 1

NEW ORLEANS, LA — “No hard feelings” is how C.J. Spiller sums up his time with the New Orleans Saints. In an concerted effort to both improve their moral image and save money at the same time, the team has cut ties with the running back on Monday.

C.J. (which stands for Circle Jerk) Spiller is a known sideline and locker room masturbator / self rapist.

Spiller, 29, signed a four-year, $16 million deal with the Saints last year. He was suspended […]

Thou Shall Make NFL Sunday a Holy Day

September 21, 2014 4

Oh, righteous of women, serve your man the brewed
nectar of grain and hops for with he shall enjoy
the nfl action.

Make not appearances without a scrumptious snack or
beverage in silent servitude, for the action is intense
and worthy of thy male eyes.

Forthwith, during halftime, pleasure thou mate on
thy knees with vigor, for 14 minutes shall pass
in quickening.

Place a steak meal in a tv tray before thy mate upon
the final whistle, for it is