Profile of Masturbation Music: Tool

April 25, 2015 20

Flock, I would like to bring to your attention the latest danger facing our precious youth: the masturbation band known as Tool.  Last week, while hosting my sister’s family at the compound campus in Safford, I […]

Masturbators Catfished By SexBot at SBSW Festival!

March 17, 2015 4

Flock, it has come to my attention that a rather significant secular music festival, South By Southwest (SBSW), is currently taking place in Austin, Massachusetts.  Like any festival, desperate masturbators looking for self-rape material are […]