Donald Trump Fulfills First Prophecy, Disposes of Mexican Dictator Fidel Castro

The Mexican Despot Will Terrorize Normal Americans No More!

Havana, Mexico — Praise!  In the first of what is sure to be thousands of prophecies fulfilled, Dear Leader Donald Trump has administered swift and fatal justice to Mexican tyrant, Fidel Castro, who was killed today by special forces on the orders of the President-elect, ending decades of masturbation-related terrorism worldwide.


– Lonnie Childs



About Lonnie Childs 47 Articles
Hello, my name is Lonald "Lonnie" Childs and I am the founder and president of the STOP Masturbation NOW anti-masturbation movement. Please visit my Facebook page here, and my unaccredited institution of higher learning here,
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12 Comments on Donald Trump Fulfills First Prophecy, Disposes of Mexican Dictator Fidel Castro

    • What is sarcasm, parody and snark? Some patriarchal words based on reason and humor? Gross! Reason and humor offends my feelthinks. Humor has no place in an equalitarian society!

  1. The only negative thing about Comrade Castro was that he was male. Other than that he was a great revolutionary. I disagree with the “masturbation terrorist” part. I am a huge proponent of terrorism, but only the Islamic/animal rights/communist/otherkin/eco-feminist kind. Masturbation was never part of Cuba’s agenda. Porn is not legal in the country:

  2. There is so much idiocy and ignorance in this article I’m now convinced this site is satire as I refuse to believe that anyone could be this idiotic. Quite funny though, good job on that!

  3. this website HAS to be a joke… MASTURBATING CAUSED EARTHQUAKE? are you serious? please kill me now but murder this website.

  4. Hi. I am very interested in this website and the validity of its arguments and reporting, which, on a scale of one to ten, is somewhere below Cuba. Did I just insult you? Is that high? Is that low? Do you know were the fuck that is? You clearly don’t, and before you ‘report’ on something, you should do a quick google search so that you don’t bring others’ IQ points down by being around so much idiot all in one place. Did you know what Castro stood for? Because it certainly was NOT masturbation. This website is so toxic I couldn’t even make a meme out of it, and that’s saying something.

    Reader with two fucking brain cells

    • It’s interesting to note that the number of brain cells you have and the number of genders there are is the same.

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