B.L.U.F.F. AZ – The Foundation for a Better Tomorrow, along with NASA, has determined that self rape residues in the atmosphere are at unsafe levels in many areas of the United States.
The FFBT and NASA, as part of a joint taxpayer funded coalition, has been measuring the levels of masturbation particulates, semen droplets, and pubic dust in the atmosphere for the past ten years using orbiting satellite technology and data collection standards. Historical records have shown that self rape residue (S.R.R.) levels increase exponentially during summer months in areas of high humidity where SRRs are more susceptible to ionic attachment to water and cloud forms.
Those living in areas of high SRR are advised to wear protective covering about their faces. Any open sores should also be dressed with fresh bandages and changed frequently.
Refrain, or course, from masturbation and excessive handling of the sex organs. A two shake limit during urination is in effect.