Foreigners / Weather

Mexico Punished By Huge Volcanic Eruption

(StopMasturbationNOW)—Praise Lonnie Childs! The Calbuco volcano in the Mexican state of Chile continued erupting for the second week causing over 6500 people to flee their mud huts. The ash and fire has reportedly shot as high as 40,000 feet. About 1,500 people in Ensenada, in the foothills of the volcano, were told to evacuate earlier this week, essentially turning it into a ghost town, The Associated Press reported. A new round of evacuations came Friday as ash and mud were detected in a nearby river.

Capture

The height of the volcanic ash emitted triggered concerns that the dust could contaminate water, trigger respiratory illnesses and halt more flights. No injuries have been reported.

According to seismologist David Rossi from the Wyoming Institute of Technology, “volcanic ash in the lungs can cause respiratory illness and even death, both contribute to a remarkable decline in masturbation”

“volcanic ash in the lungs can cause respiratory illness and even death, both contribute to a remarkable decline in masturbation”

Female Michelle Bachelet declared a state of emergency, saying the eruption of Calbuco was “more serious and unpredictable” than the one last month at the Villarica volcano, which also forced the evacuation of thousands.

“We don’t have any problems with supplies, water or sewage up to now. That’s not the problem,” said Bachelet, who visited the area Thursday. “Our problem is a respiratory one, from inhaling all of this ash, and the fact that this ash could generate some sort of environmental contamination.”

The 6,500 foot Calbuco last erupted in 1972 and is considered one of the top three most potentially dangerous among Chile’s 90 active volcanos. Most tectonic events once considered to be cause by the now disproven plate tectonics hoax are now known to be caused by generations of semen leaking into the earth’s mantle. As Mexicans are some of the world’s most prolific masturbators, second only to Orientals, problems are frequent.

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Fred
Fred
5 years ago

WTF!!! “The Calbuco volcano in the Mexican state of Chile…” Get your facts right, idiots. Alleluia. Praise the Lord and pass the Vaseline.

Bevis
Bevis
5 years ago

The Earth farted. Hehehehehe. Pooooop! Farted. Hehehehehe.

Butthead
Butthead
5 years ago
Reply to  Bevis

Whoa, Bevis, check this out, it farted lightning! Cooool. Huh huh huh. Huh huh. Lightning. Kaboom! Huh huh.

Bevis
Bevis
5 years ago
Reply to  Butthead

Yeah! Poooooop! Kaboom! Hehehehehehe.

castro
castro
5 years ago

You guys needs to study geography before your stupid comments, Chile is a country in south america not a mexican state

Riley
5 years ago

The plate tectonics are a hoax? The volcano eruption was from semen? Yeah right. Fuck you.

Sweet Juicy Poon
Sweet Juicy Poon
4 years ago

Oh hell yeah!
I’m gonna do it all night

nice meme
nice meme
4 years ago

Nice meme

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4 years ago

“‘?>alert(‘test’);

unsaid
3 years ago

window.location.href = “http://www.pornhub.com”;

Javier García Prieto
Javier García Prieto
4 years ago

Stupid morons, Chile is a country, and for this you can have a chile in your ass