Family Values

Parents Who Masturbate Have Children Who Masturbate

Parents Who Masturbate Have Children Who Masturbate

Please think of your kids the next time you touch yourself.   God bless some of you!   -Lonnie Childs

by February 21, 2020 2 comments Family Values
Shameful Dad Walks in on His Daughter Masturbating and Does Nothing to Help Her!

Shameful Dad Walks in on His Daughter Masturbating and Does Nothing to Help Her!

By Nigel J. Covington III Sex Expert October 17, 2018 Dear Nigel, I walked in on my daughter when she was masturbating the other day. I was shocked, but I said nothing — I simply left the room. I have not discussed this with her or with my wife since. […]

San Francisco House Fire Claims Five Lives

Family Dies in House Fire Caused by Masturbating Teen

By Nigel J. Covington III, The Covington Report (SAN FRANCISCO) – An early morning fire broke out shortly after midnight Tuesday morning killing a family of five. The fire occurred at the Bryant home at 1561 San Juan Rd. in that sewer dump of San Francisco. The fire started in […]

by August 14, 2018 57 comments Family Values
Firefighters battle to stop fire from destroying the house of God.

Youth Pastor Announces that Masturbation is Healthy and Does Not Make You Gay, Church Burns to Ground

Cason, TX is a small community, barely on the map and tucked deep inside NE Texas among pine trees and red clay earth. Proud people live there – good people of God, quick to lend a hand when help is needed and slow to change as the world passes them […]

Joe, showing off his new mascot at his local BBQ establishment.

One Woman’s Trash, Area Man’s Treasure

Joe Harris, like many other residents of Safford, has been struggling for years to keep his business afloat during the Obama administration. What he needed, he always felt, was a mascot for his restaurant to set him apart from all the others. He never thought, however, that dream would become […]

by January 25, 2017 5 comments Family Values
Family Unknowingly Sleeps in Hotel with Remnants of Self-Rape in Drawer

Family Unknowingly Sleeps in Hotel with Remnants of Self-Rape in Drawer

TEXARKANA – Bad room service was the least of the worries a family of four were forced to deal with after a semen stained rag was found stuffed into a Gideon’s Bible in the drawer of their room. The Texarkana Times reports the parents had noticed a foul smell in […]

by November 23, 2016 3 comments Family Values
A Young Girl’s Dilemma – Ask Cassidy

A Young Girl’s Dilemma – Ask Cassidy

Dear, Cassidy. I’m a 14 year-old girl attending Hickory Woods Middle School in Clydesdale, IL. There’s a creepy boy named Marty Swanson who wears baggy pants, a collar shirt, and has dirty beady eyes. He’s always slurping, wiping at his face, and making strange intestinal sounds in school. In my […]

by August 24, 2016 18 comments Family Values
The Pridemore Family, during happier times.

Youth Caught Self Raping

When Dana Pridemore of Evanston, IL climbed the stairs of her family’s two-story suburban home to  retire for the evening, all she had on her mind was her Harper’s Magazine and a few segments of the Tonight Show before turning in. She visited her daughter Sarah, who at the tender […]

by June 23, 2016 64 comments B.L.U.F.F., Family Values
SMN Ministries Celebrates 1,000th Funeral Protested

SMN Ministries Celebrates 1,000th Funeral Protested

We all know there is no better way to warn people about an eternity in hell then when death is staring them in the face. There is nowhere where this opportunity presents itself better than at a funeral.  At these events you will find: the corpse of a dead person, […]

by March 30, 2016 3 comments Family Values
Is an Absent Father to Blame for Masturbation?

Is an Absent Father to Blame for Masturbation?

The rise of feminism in the US has encouraged many women to become single-parents. In these families, the only contribution the father makes is in the form of child-support payments.  While only 20% of the child-support payment goes towards the child itself, the mother hits a “Pay Day” with the […]

by January 15, 2016 10 comments Family Values
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