Death

Burn “The Man” Now…Burn IN HELL Later!

Friends, I want to warn you about a nefarious group of liberal anarchists who make annual pilgrimages to the Black Rock desert in Mexico to partake in the so-called “Burning Man” festival.

The Burning Man Project started in the early 1980’s after a group of San Franciscan hippers high on the dangerous street drug “ellis dee” decided to rebel against Godly morals by traveling to and masturbating in all 50 United States.  Typical of stupid and lazy drugged-out atheists, they failed to adequately prepare for the undertaking and ran out of gas in the middle of the desert.  With nothing better to do, the group decided to masturbate their dried-out sin zones (“Burn The Man”) and, like some disturbing black magic, a new Satanic movement was born.

The festival takes place over a 7-day period at the end of summer and commences with the ritualistic “Burning of The Man” where the thousands of attendees participate in a gigantic circle-jerking-off session.  The depraved sinnery that take place over those 7 days reads like the bucket list for your typical Godless liberal:  Marijuana injecting, hemp-bonging, tent-pitching, sodomy, mouth sex, race mixing, secular art & music, nudity, Communism, Bible-Burning and Obama-worshipping.

Please hold your Bible, guns, and children close this week in prayer, and, as always, God bless some of you!

 

-Lonnie Childs

Typical Burning Man attendee

Typical Burning Man attendee

Ellis Dee has ravaged the brain of this hipper.

Ellis Dee has ravaged the brain of this hipper.

Do you really want your children, or anyone for that matter, masturbating in the desert?

Do you really want your children, or anyone for that matter, masturbating in the desert?

Festival-goer preparing for "The Burn"

Festival-goer preparing for “The Burn”

 

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Cathy Redmond
7 years ago
Reply to  Lonnie Childs

Further proof your Prayer App is super effective, Lonnie.

Praise.

Cassidy Pen
7 years ago
James
James
7 years ago

You so funny Lonnie!

Michael
Michael
7 years ago

That is offensive and rude and not even true. Try going to one and actually asking about it. First, satanism *laveyan satanism which is the most popular type* don’t even worship the devil. They worship themselves. They don’t worship any deity or idol. They worship themselves and protect themselves from harm. They don’t do any sacrificing or hating. They don’t believe in evil. They believe in themselves and what is right for them. As a Christian, I believe that they can believe in whatever they want. I mean, I have no proof god exists. There is no proof. No real… Read more »

Truffle
7 years ago
Reply to  Michael

Blah, blah, blah Michelle… No one cares about what you think. Silly, lesser gendered.

Darkblitzfrenzy
Darkblitzfrenzy
7 years ago
Reply to  Truffle

Nethier does anyone else care about what you think,silly Cat-Humper.

Truffle
7 years ago

Silly masturhater.

Michael
Michael
7 years ago
Reply to  Truffle

It’s MICHAEL. Fuckin get it right you dumbfuck.

Truffle
7 years ago
Reply to  Michael

Michelle, I still hear you. Hush your lesser gendered tongue.

Tony
Tony
6 years ago
Reply to  Truffle

Truffle, aren’t you a ‘lesser gender’ ?

fillib flatures
fillib flatures
7 years ago

Someone cant get a joke

Feonix
Feonix
7 years ago

Can I get a feel you man? Lol know then grow.

Jesus Christ
Jesus Christ
7 years ago

The fuck is wrong with you all. You belive this wirdo Lonnie. I mean have any of you been to burning man? Go down there and see what it actually is like. All of you wiredos are just pathetic pieces of crap!

Jimmy
Jimmy
7 years ago

Lonnie and Truffle shame on you. Stop harassing Michael and do something productive with your time. Lonald, please start jacking me off at a medium pace and Truffle or should I call you by your new name FLUFFLE please begin tounging my bunghole and get us boys ready for the circle jerk at my place. Thank you. And by the way I’ve passed Jasper Centaur up on the prayer leaderboard. Now I can tea bag him from above!

Praise

Jesus Christ
Jesus Christ
7 years ago
Reply to  Jimmy

I’m game for the circle jerk Jimmy name the time and place!

Emma Lou Bain
7 years ago

This is lies! Burning Man isn’t like this… Burning Man sets up several workshops every year, yes there is one called Vital Sex but they do NOT masturbate lol it’s a workship about freeing sexual energy to help you with your partner in the most modest and spiritual way, it helps when you have problems too… there is other workships too like meditation, reki massages and what not, stuff like that, when they do go around a fire they do not masturbate… they dance (and not naked they have bathing suits, shorts and sleaveless shirts or bikinis on), so you… Read more »

Rev. Adams, D.D., A.A., M.C., D.Bib., Ordained Minister
Rev. Adams, D.D., A.A., M.C., D.Bib., Ordained Minister
6 years ago
Reply to  Emma Lou Bain

What you describe is pure Witchcraft and the devil worshippers who attend this wicked ritual should cast themselves into the fire before God does it for them.

Rev. Adams, D.D., A.A., M.C., D.Bib., Ordained Minister
Rev. Adams, D.D., A.A., M.C., D.Bib., Ordained Minister
6 years ago

God help us. What will Satan come up with next. Ritual human sacrifice by burning a man. This generation is lost to hellfire and damnation. I pray for Armageddon to come soon. Lord bring me to rapture as soon a possible.

steve
steve
6 years ago

shocking! thank you michelle for your bracing feminine counterpoint but i hope we can agree that dispite our differences concerning the role od selfrape in Burning the Man Festival, marijuana injecting and race mixing are not christian. praise be.