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Praise!
THIS IS THE DUMBEST THING I’VE EVER SEEN, AND I WATCHED THE FIRST EPISODE OF JERSEY SHORE.
Amen nigga
You have masturbation rage! Praying at you now!
Masturbation rage? I for one feel relaxed after.
You can lie to yourself but you can’t lie to us. Why don’t you go and selfrape in front of some cops? Bet you’ll feel reeeeaaalll relaxed then. You sicken me.
How am I lying? And why on earth why would I rub one out in front of the police? I’m not an animal. Just a human being with an IQ above 75 (unlike yourself unfortunately).I think, you sir need to get laid. Give a shot. Marijuana too.
“Marijuana too.” No shock that you’re a hemp bonger. Self rape and marijuanas abuse go hand-in-hand. Appalling.
Excuse me, but how you do “self-raping”?? Raping is a cruely action against the will of the victim while being comfort with your own sexuality and love yourself that much is one of the highest things god gave to us…. Love and multiply says the bible and also love thy neighbor as thyself… though if i’m not loving myself I cant love anybody else… Please do not misuse the lords words for your own opinion, open your eyes and your hearts for the love (of god) and you will realize the gifts he gave to us… No need to be… Read more »
No you need to use both hands separately. Otherwise you burn your dong. Don’t mix your hands up.
Yeah. Damdest thing, huh? Who would have guessed a pot smoking masturbator could ever be so successful?
Hahahaha, guys just look at Erich, he is as dumb as it gets, seems like he is devoid of any form of critical thinking, yet he is still clueless about the fact that it doesnt stop him from talking through his ass.
I masturbate, and I’ve smoked pot, and I’m also a high flying estate agent with a lovely family and more money than you could dream of. Oh, and god is about as real as the Easter Bunny 🙂
Why don’t you fuck your wife in front of some cops?
i dont think he has one
Uuuuuhh, I’m pretty sure masturbation is consensual, as it is between one person and him(or her)self. Therefore, “selfrape” isn’t even close to a valid description. Also, the dude isn’t lying. Masturbation feels good and doesn’t make you angry. Deal with it. If you think otherwise, then nobody with any sliver of intelligence or the ability to think for themselves has any reason to listen to anything you say.
lmao this site is satire
Unfortunately not….
It is meant to be satire. One of the pages mentions “Hard Dawn” as a trusted news source. Google shows that that’s not a thing, so that leads me to believe that it’s a pun on hard on, the term for a male erection.
All you need is to see the acronym (BLUFF). It’s satire of the same model of Landover Baptist church (https://www.landoverbaptist.org).
daft cunt.
You can’t self rape the willing.
Erich, are you, like, actually for real? I mean, I know you could be, but I’m really hoping somebody couldn’t be as stupid as you. I’m a Christian, but you give us a bad name. This whole website gives Christians a bad name, and the only reason I’m on here is to ridicule it. It’s like a Westboro Baptist Church homepage. Anyway, if you’re serious, your stupidity is really funny, to me. Keep up the laughs, my friends think you’re funny, too. P.S.: I self-love constantly.
I hope you burn in hell you sick demented bitch, go fuck your self with a parsnip
Go get laid, dude!
Your mom asked me to masturbate her last night. It’s a sin to forcefully restrain a child in a fucking straight jacket 😂
i dont think you know what rape is. i was actually raped and comparing masturbation to rape is actually disgusting. masturbation is natural and it’s perfectly healthy to explore sexuality. grow up.
why dont you stick up a deagle .50 up ear and pull the trigger?
I’m gonna chief on a fat J and take 4 shots of vodka and rub one out just to spite you.
Thats a valid idea glooks ill lyk if it works
“Selfrape” oh i forgot to ask myself consent first, I should sue myself!
Dude he’s trolling you. This is obviously a satire site.
Unfortunately, it isn’t!!!
I’m jacking off to your pic right now as we speak. You look like one of those little bitch boys who enjoys having his sinful entrance stretched and welcomes the warn hard glory into his glory hole.
Me too
Praying at you. Self-rape is a serious sin!
It’s not rape if it’s willingly done
facts my brudda
A serious sin? Where did you get that ? How can be love (in whatever form) be a sin?
Except the Word “self-rape” doesnt exist, raping someone and loving someone are two really opposite things, hope the lord gives you the gift of understanding….
I’m a Christian and i was tought to spread love, not to spread hate to whatever god gaves to us….
Praying for you poor child of anxiety and hope you will find love one day ❤️
Yeah like tf is self rape??
What you’ve been saying is one of the most insanely idiotic things I’ve ever heard. Everyone on this site is now dumber for having read it. May He call down a plague of pornography and flying penises upon you, and may He have mercy on your child abusing soul.
Umm your just dumb, masterbation is like kissing a god!
I used to be bendy enough I could kiss my god.
U are a depressed individual
lol
by your physical appearance you should masterbate, good luck at getting a girl you might want to turn gay men are easier! you look like a little boy maybe you will fit on one of those boards! lol ha ha
you cannot tell me you never touched yourself, bro.
Stfu stupid ass
I feel good after playing with myself
This is freakin’ hillarious. In my country we call it child abuse
In my country, joke doesn’t get YOU
You must be from Mexico then where the worst type of people on this planet come from. Only a Mexican would laugh about child abuse. May Saint Lonnie bless you with his Golden Shower of Enlightenment and turn you into a more normal person. Praise!
I’m from Mexico and we don’t laugh about child abuse, you’re really misinformed. I’m sad for your judgmental attitude. We don’t even think of using this “blessed” thing.
I’m Mexican and I don’t laugh about it. So many people, mainly caucasians, come up with all these dumb things about what Mexicans do & what not & it’s so stupid. I’ve gotten bullied many times before & called all these names for being Mexican. So you’re irrelevant. Have a great day 🙂
Marta, I’m from California, and I’m white, and I for one love Mexicans… love their culture, their dedication to family, and their hard work. And I love a nice latina accent… damn sexy…
Um, first that’s racist and “god” is suppose to “love all his children” that includes the WHOLE WORLD and second you don’t ever feel enlightened after a golden shower…probably more sticky :/
😅🤣 made my day, thx 😉
A golden shower….? Does he pee on you…?
Gracie, I can’t tell if you’re being serious or not. If you are, you’re one of the stupidest people I’ve ever met, and on par with your buddies, on this website. They’re not laughing about child abuse, you fucking racist(by the way, how is THAT not some great sin?), they’re pointing out that this fucking immobilization torture device IS child abuse.
I think you guys are so set against masturbation because lame asses such as yourselves would probably never get the chance to reproduce. You know in the back of your head, though not willing to admit even to yourselves, that’s all you’d be doing and you and your dimwitted kind would eventually fade away from existence from lack of effort on trying to get laid. Oh and now your racist God fearing people as well, huh? I am willing to bet not a single person involved with website are half the person I am. I am of Mexican descent and… Read more »
I guess you schooled us then. Laughing out loud on the Internet!
I agree I am a borderline genius (that’s what my I.Q says) who is a Christian who lives an a beautiful home and im 13. he reason you guys on Stop Masturbation fear masturbation is because you overlook the possibility that masturbation is what humans have the desire to do and there is sin in it but if I were a predator I would by this for the sake of torture and I hope this website is a joke if it isn’t than lord save us
Somebody is racist!
You’re 13, and you browse this fucking website? That is a fucking sin.
I’m jacking off while looking at your pics.
no surprise you are a racist given the fact that you are fucking retarded
I for one love to Self love to some latina pornography.
lol you’re an idiot
In my country(US) I called the cops on my neighbor when she used this and I heard the kid screaming, now you have 3 guesses to see who’s facing child abuse charges
haha, you said golden shower //snicker//
Golden shower, huh ? Saint Lonnie seems a bit deviant.
Wow! That as some racist Shit. You need help.
*sniggers* Golden shower, eh?
*golden shower xD
gracie ur a bitch pls go stick a dildo up your christian ass
go to pornhub.com or youporn.com today!
you’re obviously a chronic masturbator
I don’t understand the Pray For and Pray Against buttons they both sound like they are disproving no matter what. When people say I’ll pray for you something horrible is happening and praying against you sounds like you want something horrible to happen to them so you can pray for them instead. Plus masturbation improves mental and immune functions. So people who are against it keep doing what your doing you’ll die before the rest of us and give us sane people some peace and quiet.
Praying AT you!
youre praying at someone instead of god? arent you just the best christian ever
This is child abuse
shit like this is why we have school shootings and shit, all you motherfuckers are fucked im the head, lmfao
Haha laughed my fucking ass off. As an Aussie, it’s nearly impossible for me to comprehend that this isn’t a satirical site. Sadly, I know some evangelicals who are actually this crazily retarded. FUCK HUMANITY. END IT.
amen
‘ERICH SEAN’ lol
Everyone calm down! I’m pretty sure this site is a joke…It is right? I almost lost my mind when I read this shit. The fact that I’m not 100% sure it’s a joke is almost more infuriating. Fuck it I’m burning down a church and beating off in the ashes. Watch me beat my meat God, Strike me in my lightning rod, and if you don’t like what I do, I’ll shoot my sticky load at you!
You do sound like a chronic self-rapist. Most masturbators are highly violent people, and your threats to burn down a church are not surprising in the least. I hope that someday you will see the light, and realize self-rape doesn’t just hurt you, it’s hurts your family, too. I’ll be praying at you.
Never will understand ur dumb ass sayings wtf how tf is it self rape do u even know the definition of rape -__- rape is unwilling wtf is unwilling n shit about masterbaiteing when it’s normal u guys are basically saying anything tht is not, hat. U like is unnatural and wrong and we will go to hell for our “sins” if there really I’s a God he would probably send u dumb asses to he’ll Cuz I’m pretty sure he’d be embarrassed of u hell even the devil would be wtf all of this shit better be a joke… Read more »
Randy Wood must be the best name for an anti-masturbation activist anyone could come up with.
Can’t decide if they’re trolling or not. This is the greatest game of troll or not a troll ever.
Does this come in adult sizes? And is there a way to lock in yourself?
Seriously? If this is what one needs, or desires for better behavior, why not?
FUCK HER RIGHT IN THE PUSSY
AFTER I TOUCH MY SINZONE
Fuck Erich, you’re a gay cunt, listen to yourself! Find a bridge and jump off please, you worthless piece of shit, seriously you’re depriving oxygen from people that could benefit from it unlike yourself and your zealous little buddies. As a religious person myself I find this whole website a fucking joke, what sane person would use this on their child? I wouldn’t wish this on “normal” people but none of you are, so I hope (fingers crossed) that maybe you can all actually be raped, so you can see what rape really is. I would spit on you, you’re… Read more »
No man. Even if this site is a complete joke; you don’t wish rape on anybody. If you knew a victim you would know it’s not funny. Self rape, sure thats hilarious… it doesn’t exist. You’re religious huh? What would your god say to you if he heard that? Way to kill the vibe with your profane hate. Jackass.
I know why they wanna forbid masturbation!
YOU SHALL NOT WASTE TIME TO HAVE SEX WITH OTHERS AND BECOME PARENTS AT VERY YOUNG AGE!
Let them become more and more…
As a happily married man of 15 years, my wife and I felt an overwhelming desire to express their gratitude of the creation of this God-sent product. However, since I only allow myself and my male children access the internet ( since women are too vulnerable left alone without male supervision ) , my wife will not be commenting on this video and instead my views will also express her views. As I was saying, since the production of this decency device my wife and I no longer fear the the lustful grip of Satan perverting the innocent thoughts of… Read more »
You keep proclaiming your children no longer have sinful thoughts due to this device…no device can take away those thoughts, only physical actions.
Your thinking is delusional & perverse.
After praying long and hard on your comment, I have found your advice enlightening. I will no longer just strap my beautiful children to this holy device, I will also commence the expulsion of Satan from the innocent bodies of my offspring through the “physical actions” that you have suggested. I hope that you are proud of me O Dear Commenter as I now employ routine beatings and burnings to aid in my childrens absolvation in God’s eyes. I especially enjoy employing the burning method as I find it really scares my children from falling from God’s favour and into… Read more »
Why is everyone so butthurt over Christopher’s comments? He’s clearly a well educated, literate troll. Fucking beautiful work, sir.
Whoa! I don’t even know where to start. First, I understand you trying to teach your children to obstain. However, this isn’t teaching. It is forcing. And leaving them in that for hours on end without providing their essential needs, is neglect and abuse. Second, if your children have entered puberty, they masturbate. Period. When you are not looking, they find a way. It’s a natural thing to explore your own body and to feel sexual pleasure. It should be about teaching them why they should obstain and teaching them how to. Because they won’t always be in your house.… Read more »
Well Jaclyn, those must be two cents of pure gold and at a diameter of one foot! One of the few sincere comments here. You are right about the relationship with Christ and God, but this harness might be what somebody needs. The important thing is that the parents understand their children’s needs instead of jumping into the wrong solution. This harness might be the right solution for some, and trying it on yourself is a good way to understand what it does. I also prayed for you.
O.K ur extremely sick and should have ur kids taken away from u God damn how the fuck are u even allowed to have custody of your kids and wife when u obviously abuse ur wife saying that all women are to weak minded for the. internet and also abuse ur kids God they must hateeeeee you same with your wife unless she is completely brainwashed to thing ur more powerful then her smh sad sad human being
Dear Commenter, You assault my eyes with such Satan Speak ! I furthermore do not appreciate the insults given to me when, each day, I toil and trouble to ensure my beautiful children follow the Path to God’s Palace. You seek to belittle my actions through your Stinging Slander but need I remind you I am merely God’s Vessel for which his Sacred Sentience is being channeled through. And in relation to my ” brainwashed” wife, I am happy to say she is grateful for my recommendation that she give up her job in favour of devoting every single waking… Read more »
1. If you thought that what somebody told you that the only way to expell pervurse ideas from a child was through beatings and BURNINGS you are no better than the people who put jesus on a cross and whipped him. 2. If you could tell me your full name i would like to report domestic abuse and child abuse. 3. The averege male thinks about sex every seven seconds you cant stop your son and just because he looks at his penis doesnt mean he is gay.
Did you read the bible? Because if Satan didn’t exist, humans would be one-minded, brainwashed creatures. Satan is the reason humans can think critically. I don’t worship any god, or Satan for that matter.
Bridgetbrown I must agree with you. Although women are weak in some respects, as a man I am more ashamed of the weaker minds of men, who have assaulted me more, insulted, stolen from, lied, and led me, yes, to sin more. Weak mindedness is what leads us to sin, and women are mostly on the stray path because my fellow MEN, upon whom WOMEN DEPEND, lead them astray and into sin! Thank you.
Hey my neighbor did that too, I heard her kid yelling something about not wanting to be locked up, being beat up by his father and being starved by the mother. Now guess who’s facing child abuse charges?
The joke went over so many people’s heads, it’s staggering…
You’re probably the smartest guy here lol 😉
http://i.4cdn.org/b/1411111637682.jpg
Alfons, can you give another link? Government doesn’t like that site.
I will buy it for my 50th anniversary of my masturbatory CV.
*Side efects: A small portion of the teenagers that used this product developed a Bondage Fetish when they grow up
I don’t often masturbate. But when I do I beat that motherfucker like it owes me money 🙂
THIS IS NOT WHAT THIS BOARD IS USED FOR! THIS IS USED IN THE EMERGENCY ROOM TO WHEN DOING PROCEDURES ON YOUNG CHILDREN WHO MUST REMAIN STILL….COME ON PEOPLE…GET REAL
This… is perhaps the greatest comment in the history of the internet.
I was just masturbating while reading this. And it was soooo good!!
I can’t believe at how evil the Christians are to non christians and themselves. STUPID RELIGION FOR STUPID PEOPLE!!!
Christians are not a religion. Neither is Christ. Nor Christianity. He is the one true first Son of God but we are all children of God too. It is a relation between you, Christ and God. Nobody can tell you what to do or be. Only God.
True shit smfh
we should report this website to the FBI
you people are sick
Why is the world filled with fucking idiots? How do you not realize that this is all satire, including what Erich Sean is saying? Are you all really THAT thick?
Why is there a “Pray Against” button?
Exactly Maxxxx! Aren’t we supposed to pray for all of God’s children? Even those who hurt us, blame us, lie to us, steal our belongings and belittle us?
Amen!
Why is it called self rape lol that’s funny and Jesus is a lie go fuck yourself
masturbation is natural and a wonderful form of relaxation. this gadget is a form of child abuse!
God will punish you!
this is a Satanic device!
you will all rot in hell!
1. Rape is non-consensual sex. If the kid choose to do it to himself then it’s not rape. This trivializes true rape.
2. Putting a kid in this thing is child abuse.
Consensual sex requires two or more people to consent. Rape only requires one person (the rapist) to consent. By masturbating, you are the only one consenting, hence, you are raping yourself.
Masturbating is not sex. It’s masturbating.
If there is a sexual organ involved, its sex. And If its only one person involved, and that person is yourself, its incest. And unless your genitals have vocal cords and can give consent, its RAPE!
Well by that rock solid logic, sex of any kind would be rape too because my Penis didn’t vocally approve this. No. That is easily the dumbest thing I’ve read all day. My (and everyone else s intelligence has been decreased by reading what you have posted. Congratulations.
I urinate using my penis, a sexual organ. Are you implying I can get laid just by pissing? Wow…I’ve been doing it wrong this whole time.
“If there is a sexual organ involved, its sex.” Can’t disagree.
“If its only one person involved, and that person is yourself, its incest.”
Not at all. Please review the definition of incest.
“And unless your genitals have vocal cords and can give consent, its RAPE!”
In fact, it’s the other way round: my genitals demand and I consent or don’t consent.
So when you procreate with someone you got married to its still rape since your genitals don’t have a voice. And here I thought the Westboro Baptist Church was bad.
did i…am i….is this real life???
Ok so by that logic washing your sexual organs is raping them and you wouldn’t want to do that right?
remind me not to stand too close to you !!!
LOL @ Jimmy.
The Joke
——————-
Your head
Do you guys get angry when the Onion hits too close to home also?
ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL
Whilst washing my genitals I realise I may have just water boarded them by your logic and they didn’t even make a sound.
Mrs rubright. My name is darnel slapcock. We should pray together all night.
OMG, you are so right! I never thought about it in that way. And what about the innocent hands? Aren’t they victims of this evil ploy as well? Come to think of it, is that what they mean by idle hands?
im self raping myself all over your face right now.
So by your logic all sex is rape, your can’t and never will be able to consent to anything so by your logic every human, every time they fuck, it’s rape.
Christina, first off, you’re an idiot, and second off, you look more like a rapist, than anybody I’ve ever seen.
Your name of a sexual organ in your surname according to your logic my penis and anybody elses didnt consent so you are raping
You are retarded.
Do you climax while pissing?
My genitals don’t consent when I have sex with someone – anyone really as I love casual sex with many people. I am who consents. Therefore, you saying “unless my genitals have vocal cords and can give consent, it’s RAPE” is laughable at best. My genitals belong to me and as such I am the one who’s CONSENT matters. Whether I’m fucking myself or I’m fucking someone else or even if I’m fucking multiple people.
Er, I’d say: masturbation IS sex, but I don’t see how sex with yourself could be wrong!
Do they make these in adult sizes? I love bondage.
Bo, wonderful thought!
If you are a girl (adult) and want a partner, I’m here.
That was so stupid. You people are the ones that make religion seem a massive contagion of ignorance…. GOSH
Did you check what psychologist say? This is simply basic. Goddammit! Always fomenting intolerance and hatred among human beings
No rape requires one or more person(s) to NOT consent
Really hard to understand this sentence, but at the end, agree.
Please use better English.
With twisted logic like this, it is useless trying to point out your abuse of the English language
Nikita you seem to be a very intelligent person. How you look, what you write… I might rape myself later thinking of you….
Good thing I don’t choose to press charges on this dashingly good looking rapist of mine, I’m not sure if this site is pure satire or you’re all a bunch of bible-thumping numskulls. I’m praying to my lord and savior Lucifer to wipe your deadhead mind from this earth so that one day everyone may “self-rape”,be married to the same sex, or follow whatever path in life they may choose without a false deity following cult to tell them otherwise.
yes, it is child abuse. if i ever seen a kid in one of these im calling the cops.
but they look so happy, how could you deny such a wonderful experience to a child?
Hahhaa this is the dumbest thing I’ve ever seen, fucking stupid ass Christians. LOL sex is fantastic.
This is not about sex. It is about child rape molestation. Which is illegal in all 48 states!
48 states? Might I ask the name of your Geography teacher so I can pray her soul never has to know of your ignorance.
It’s legal in the other two….duh!
She said “in ALL 48 states” so nice try
Wow. Did we LOSE two states when I wasn’t looking? Was it like when scientists decided that Pluto was no longer a planet? Pluto probably shrunk because of Galactic Warming due to all the friction generated by all the masturbating going on!
Pluto shrunk because of the wickedness on earth and so many evil childres masturbating and abusing themselves.
Would you agree that ‘child molestation’ is stopping and frustrating the normal course of the sexual discovery of a child? Or would you call stopping the normal course in name of goddamn prejuices, which will later cause REAL sexual deviations?’
Wow. You are a true troll, teach me in your arts
You are so ignorant; you need to go back to school because clearly you have no idea of what sex is.Crawl back under the rock you came from, you’d do us all a huge favour.
Yes, this makes sense. Let’s immobilize our children to “prevent” rape. Ever seen silence of the lambs? This is how the red dragon is born. You people are sick, twisted fucks.
Dear Christina, I’m jacking off to your pic right now as we speak.
Kind regards
Christina rub me, right?
Wow… im an European and even i know that the United States of America has 50 states… you are freaking pathetic.
Im finding very hard to keep my hands of my sin stick while looking at your profile pic Christina…. I need help
Jacking off to your pic right now!
What two states are those? I want to know NOW!
All this thing needs is a gag across the mouth and those good Christians can use this device to molest children. Are they marketing it to priests for the alter boys?
wow, you are a special kind of stupid, aren’t you?….
Agreed, jhonny. Masturbators are the special kind of stupid.
Jesus was a alcoholic and people that jerk the gerkin are! Logic! What about his prostitute friends
Just #rustlemyjimmies. Happy? Your a special kind of special kind of idiot
Im the president and I approve this message
I’m masturbating to this website right now. True story. I’m gonna blow my load all over a pic of the Virgin Mary too. Give her the ole Divine Money shot.
That’s how I made you Jesus! I could not taint marys little virgin pussy with my massive, throbbing god cock; so I did the right thing and just fucked her titties while I watched Mohammed fuck her ass; and than blew the cum into her dirty middle-world hair canyon to save everyone. Come to think of it, after you left she turned into a total whore. I would materialize into a new animal every weekend; and she would fuck me like the rapture just ended. Even took a barbed lion shaft for forty five minutes once. That woman was… one… Read more »
Holy shit lmfao
The fact that this exists is appalling. The fact that people actually support the use of this is so mind boggling, I think I am now dumber for having visited a website that people like this frequent. I’m horrified. Any parent who puts a child in a restraint like this deserves to have their children removed by CPS.
Im the president and I approve this message!
This going to be this year’s “Tickle Me Elmo” at Christmas time. You may think this is “appalling” or “dumb” but you won’t think it’s very dumb when your children are literally begging for one this November and Brother Lonnie is sold out until 2015. Way to ruin Christmas for your kids.
Praise.
Tell me what kind of gifts do your children normally get that they would be begging for this instead?
Im the president, and this bitch needs jesus
Cathy, love you, pray for you.
I am currently masturbating and worshipping my dark lord; satan while also listening to black death metal. Also, this weed is strong, man.
Enjoy being sodomized by Satan.
Sorry, Erich, but Satan BOTTOMS to me. And he LOVES being sodomized by me!
http://www.minutodigital.com/imagenes2/imagen6.jpg brother look at this photo of our savior jesus Christ and pray with me
Oh ok your a christan yet you wish hell to people ok. Where the fuck does it say you cant masturbate
great point, just searched the new and old testaments and couldn’t find any mention of it
Bro do u evn Bible? It’s called the sin of Onan
I’m going to enjoy it so hard that even you will feel it
Your actually a Skank… You Useless Cunt Go Rape a Cat You Fucking Weird Jahova Slag, Go Out and Have a Laugh And Have Fun with your life instead of pretending Your the one making the rules here and Telling people they are raping themselves, Go and Actually Get some Friends…
I aM a FaGgOt WhO cApItAlLiZeS lEtTeRs RaNdOmLy FoR nO oThEr ReAsOn ThAn BeCaUsE i Am A sKaNkY wHoRe WhO wAnTs To WaTcH sOmE sKaNkY cLoSeT hOmOsExUaL fUnDiE rAeP a CaT iN tHe AsS aNd CuM iN iTs BuTtHoLe LiKe In SoMe ShItTy YiFf MoViE tHaT i FaP tO rEgUlArLy WhIlE ShOvInG a ViBrAtInG BuTtPlUg Up My AsS aNd I aLsO wRiTe FuCkInG bOrInG rUn On SeNtAnCeS tHe SiZe Of LoNg MaThEmAtIcAl PrOoFs AnD cOuLdNt ReCoGnIsE a GaY tRoLl On A sAtIrE WeBsItE tO sAvE mY oWn MaNgY aSs AnD aLsO cAnT uSe ThE pUnCtUaTiOn Erich probably has fundie parents… Read more »
I guess you’re the reason why bin laden bombs peoble
Im the president and I take blame for that, but he is the reason I gave the orders!
YOU, and all the other extreme religious people on this forum are the reason people turn from, or hate religion! God had two absolute rules “LOVE people, LOVE God”. If you want to live in good morals, and really want to change the world for the better, perhaps you should knock off the high-&-mighty, holy-art-thou, I’m-better-then-every-person-who-isn’t-me attitude, and try being more accepting of people, not to say you have to accept their choices. Jesus was friendly to EVERYONE, He loved EVERYONE!!!! No matter what people’s choices are YOU have NO right to judge or condem people to Hell!! Leave that… Read more »
Even if you leave them alone, they do not leave you alone.
I’ll enjoy it
You sure showed us by coming here to confess your current ungodly pursuits – that’s a very original sentiment btw, your masturbating while reading our holy netsite. I sure wouldn’t have thought to type that! 🙂
I’m getting one for my non same race wife. Who knows what tomfoolery she’s up to while I’m at work. I don’t trust anyone with darker skin than me.
Bless you, Brother!
pouhaha this website is the funniest thing I have ever read! You guys should show this in a comedy club you would make millions!!! Especially this retarded Erich Sean guy!!! Wow really I just cant stop laughing when reading this idiot! Keep on the retarded comments you are just proving the world that you sir are one hell of an idiot! On a side note by looking at his ugly ass face I can imagine that he must really need this shit if I where as ugly as him I sure as hell would be masturbating all the time and… Read more »
I completely agree
Sorry, I just had to pray against you god. I hope you understand.
this has to be a fucking joke right?..pls tell me this is satire
Hahaha you’re being sarcastic, right??
Bahahabababab
You racist. How can you not trust them just becaues the complexion is different. Really your not a good person. And if you cant trust your one wif we than why are you mareied and why does it matter there color
Clearly, you didn’t get it Darren. LOL
I’ve got nothing against black people. Every white family should be permitted to own two
I can’t tell if Cathy is joking and making fun of this, or if she’s drinking the kool-aid and likes it, but I’m going to go with joking, because that’s the only way I can seriously take any comparison of this contraption to Elmo, LOL! So, cheers, Cathy. well played. 🙂
Damn Christians are fucking stupid.
But the guy that thinks this website is real is really intelligent
For real… The only thing that continues to surprise me about this website is the number of absolute full retards getting their panties all in a bunch because they don’t realize it’s a joke.
Prostate cancer and other masturbation related STDs are hardly a joking matter.
Cancer is an STD? Really? And how exactly can a disease be transmitted through masturbation? Transmittion can only happen when two or more people are involved.. You are not even trying to think are you
Chronic masturbators often resort to drug use in order to cope with guilt and shame associated with trauma of repeated self-rape cycles. It won’t take long before you catch the AIDS from sharing dirty condoms with your roommates under the bridge.
Masturbation is the gateway drug to homosexuality, and brother Nikita has had heartbreaking first hand experience in attempting to nurse homogay masturbaters back to spiritual health. When the soul is unhealthy it is not long before the body becomes equally unhealthy, and this is most frequently evident with the big C and the AIDS penance.
Bless.
Ejaculating frequently actually helps preventing prostate cancer, There’s a REAL research on the matter, look for it.
Wrong, pervert. Once the masturbation has made you a gay, you will be spending most of your free time having rough unprotected anal with complete strangers. It’s only a matter of time before you catch prostate cancer in a dirty bathroom stall.
Pretty sure masturbation is the only true way to be sure not to get an STD. Thank you your ignorance knows no bounds
Chronic masturbators often resort to drug use in order to cope with guilt and shame associated with trauma of repeated self-rape cycles. It won’t take long before you catch the AIDS from sharing dirty condoms with your roommates under the bridge.
Says the man with a nude picture of him on his profile
David, I can’t help it if I look great because I eat smart and never masturbate. Maybe you can stop player hating, let go of your penis, and get a gym membership.
STD= Sexually Transmitted Disease.. 0.o How do you get an STD from masturbating? Oh right YOU CAN’T!! lol
Chronic masturbators often resort to drug use in order to cope with guilt and shame associated with trauma of repeated self-rape cycles. It won’t take long before you catch the AIDS from sharing dirty condoms with your roommates under the bridge.
No, people just stop masturbating or do it much less when they mature. Simply because it stops being that good as it was before! There is no reason to be ashamed, because everybody does it or have been.
No no no, you got it all wrong. Would you like me to draw a picture, so you understand? Anyone have any markers, this little boy Nikita needs to learn the basic 101 of sex, and masturbation.
Will this picture involve a penis? You strike me as someone who likes to draw penis. And look at penis. Penis.
Are you fucking retarded? Cancer isn’t an std you fucktard,you can’t get cancer from having sex you moronic assplunger.And how can masturbation turn you gay you moronic dipshit? I’m straight and i have a girlfriend, and i’ve masturbated before,where is your cold hard evidence ranger dick.
The only thing nikita be shalavin is dick down his throat. He hates when u masterbate because that takes from the cum loads he gets to guzzle.
Im the president and he sucked my slong ryin to get me to stop masterbating. Just sayin, my hand works so much better. Trim the goatee. We dont like bush
I wish it were a joke, but I don’t have the feeling it is! Did you read the comments of this Nikita-fucker and this Erich-moron?
How do I get 40 “pray against” within the 5 sex… sorry: secs I posted it?
this counter is somehow fucked up. You get exactly 32 pray against immediately. Is there a contact directly to webmaster so he can fix it?
I know! And his name: Eric Sean? Sounds like “Erection”! What a self-raper. Hail Satan.
Not all of us 🙁 I think this is the biggest load of bull I have ever seen, too, and I’m Christian. But this… It’s just ridiculous. It’s no wonder we are constantly viewed as idiots. I’m still trying to decide if this website is a joke or if they are being serious. If it’s the latter, I feel very, very sorry for them. Honestly. To live with such hate and prejudice… I have no words haha
Thankfully it’s not all of us. It’s just zealots like these who need to burn.
Ok, that thing is basically restraining a child and therefore it is child abuse. Masturbation is NOT rape. Rape is if your are forced to do it against your will! Why would someone even make this. Yes, I respect your religion but this is going way far. Masturbation is actually considered healthy and natural, especially for teenagers. Here’s some links proving my point. Educate your self!
http://www.womenshealthmag.com/sex-and-relationships/masturbation-facts
http://www.menshealth.com/health/health-and-sexual-benefits-masturbation
http://teenadvice.about.com/library/bl10thingsmasturbation.htm
Calm down you idiot the whole website is a joke.
Considering some of the billboard signs actually payed for by Christian interest groups…
Still not sure how many of the commenters are trolling… and how many are serious…
Let us know once you get to the bottom of this mystery. Let’s not take any chances.
if you are serious then miss you need real help!!! Try holding you breath for a few minutes and letting some of your brain matter die you may become smarter that way… You are clearly not on the right path at this moment. Masturbation leads to std and drug use wow… What leads to drug use and masturbation is idiots like you that dont have a real clue of how things work in life! Use this on one of your kids and your sure to bring a serial rapist or murder with huge drug abuse problems. Masturbation is normal as… Read more »
Dear Masturbator,
You’re not making ANY sense, which is typical of a chronic self-rapist. Please try to calm down and explain what is it that you are really trying to say.
Dear niki. And yes I remember u loved when I called u niki when u tried to show me masterbation wasnt right, u know exactly what hes talking about.
Im the president and I approve my message
This comment is usefull for all those who take it seriously although the website is a joke 😉
It’s not a joke, I’m afraid, though I’d wish it were! Read their stupid comments, you’ll see!
Nikita, are you serious? If you are, I am sorry for your ignorance. Raping requires two people. If all of the people involved agree to have sex it is not rape. Masturbarion involves 1 person.
Masturbation Masturbation is not evil, dirty or harmful – it will not make you go blind, drive you insane, turn you in to a pervert, stunt your growth, give you an STD, make you sterile or get you pregnant. Both guys and girls masturbate, it is a normal and healthy part of sexual development. Masturbation is a very personal thing and should not be done in public places or around people who are not willing partners (think safer sex activity). You are normal if you masturbate, normal if you wonder about it but don’t do it, and normal if you… Read more »
Dear sweet me this has to be some kind of joke. You do realize that if you don’t let your kid whack it at night, he’s just going to find other, less safe places to spank his little monkey. Hell, I rub on out in the bathroom stall at work on occasion.
Wait. This is a joke, right? Come on, it’s gotta be…. That’s fuckin’ child abuse! Let a fucking kid be a kid, for fucks sake. All this Christianity bullshit is what is what drives children to kill kids and go insane!
Masturbating children is funny to you? What are you? Some kind of pedophile comedian?
funny or not. Disallowing children to explore their body only leads to sexual dysfunctions and traumas in maturity and THAT is not funny!
Masturbation is the biggest sexual dysfunction of all. If we can stop masturbation, we will stop prostate cancer, AIDS and Homogayness!
Oh dear, you’re a special kind of Stupid aren’t you. You think AIDS is a result of masturbation? Really? You’re the same kind of idiot who back in the 80’s thought it was something that only affected the homosexual community. Not that i’ve checked the facts (though obviously, niether have you), but if anything, masturbation, and therefore a regular release of semen can possibly avert prostate cancer – not cause it.
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=1493967844165991&set=a.1473142926248483.1073741828.1473085312920911&type=1&theater
It is Nikita’s life story! There is no other way he could know this all that well.
It’s true. I used to live a lie. I was a leader of a Russian Prison Homogang and have once put a 12 gauge shotgun inside of myself on a dare. Brother Lonnie has saved my soul and shown me a new way to live.
I think evolution missed you christian fucktards lmao
How can 6 year olds cum?
I am sure you can cum from age of ~13-50+
They sure can. Thailand is a disgusting place.
Well thats incredibly rascist
This website has to be a joke there is no way this is real.
This is hilarious
this is child abuse any way you look at it! i believe its called unlawful imprisonment! if you are one of those people who believe that masturbation is a sin and that’s what you want to teach your kids i feel bad for them but they are not my children so i cannot say anything unless you are hurting them or are putting them in this awful traumatizing contraption! there are much better ways to teach your children that they shouldn’t masturbate than locking them up like dogs! i have no suggestions on how to teach kids not to touch… Read more »
Letting your children masturbate is the real child abuse. You’re turning your child into a child molester! Great parenting pervert!
just see my comment above…
They are not going to turn into child molesters because they masturbate you fucking idiot.
By masturbating, they are having sex with children. This makes them child molesters. Who’s the idiot now, idiot?
Masturbating is no sex, it’s masturbation. This is not just your average stupid, this is advanced stupid.
You stimulate your sex organ. You climax. It’s sex.
You do realize that sex must involve at least 2 people, right?
I know everything there is to know about sex. I’m a Cultural Attache for crying out loud.
Niki isnt lying, sure knows alot about blowing coxks. Maybe learned it from brother lonnie. I abandoned the program becsuse they wouldnt let me masterbate. Kept lockin me in a dungeon where they would suck my dick for hours… freaky shit! I think thier views are twisted. Btw, I still masterbate. Ur tortures didnt work!
-president
kids don’t even know what they are doing untill put someting stupid like that in their minds
Sure you don’t want to pound a few nails in to be safe, you people are some kind of freaks. Does it say in the bible thou shalt not pleasure thyself???
Lmao whatever kid was put thru that will end up shooting a high school or something. And if they don’t I give them some serious props lol
It’s a well known faithfact that all high school shooters have masturbated. Not a single one abstained. #notevenonce
I masterbated to your moustache
Of course they did, at least at that point they were normal!
so every high school shooter ate bread, therefore ban bread it’s the seed of evil
Heres a thought that hasnt made it through your thick skull,80% of men have masturbated at age 18 well what do you know every countries president has masturbated at least once
lol.. way to misinterpret there Erich. that was actually directed towards Nikita, but from the looks of things, you must be a special kind of stupid too. I’d like to stick around, but I got some fapping to do. while I’m at it, I’m going to fuck the shit out of this blow up fuck-doll while thinking about your Mama…
Guys….I think this isn’t a joke.
I get you people think masterbating is bad and all but why restrain your entire kid? What just cause he’s on the computer he’s looking at porn? There’s a thing called a chastity belt. (Not that I reccomend it) but if you must it’s there for a reson
wow, i’m touching myself right now watching some hot sexy lesbian porn while gluttonously eating tootsie rolls, pray for me, motherfuckers!
Dear Lord above why can’t even one masturbater be original or at least mildly amusing? Why Lord??
Because satans trident is so deep in my ass I can flick the vibrate button the my dick
Because self-rape kills brain cells. Plus, when you add in all the marijuana abuse I’m sure is taking place, it’s a wonder they can even understand basic human language. It’s sad, really.
Might I mention to yas, that in most states this device would be considered unlawful restraint, which would result in the removal of your children from your home by Child Protection Services (or whatever your state happens to call their branch of government dealing with child safety)… permanently
While I can understand the reasons behind the religious view, and respect that you have a right to your own views, I also feel that substituting one form of abuse for another is not acceptable.
They would have to find our compound first. ATF keeps missing it so we’re not too concerned about other government agencies. Praise!
I’m so happy that this product is now becoming mainstream. I made a similar device for my daughter when she was 9 years old and I caught her self-molesting at night, while looking at pictures of other girls! Now she’s 14, and I’ve found a much older husband for her. Her husband-to-be still insists she sleep in her cross, and now she’s pregnant! Either the shape inspired immaculate conception, or she’s pregnant from having sex with a man as God intended! She’s not too happy about my choice of her husband or the pregnancy, but, I couldn’t be more proud… Read more »
I am very happy to hear that your daughter has received the Lord’s blessing! ^_^
Let her find her own husband and let her do whatever the fuck she wants with her life….. sure most people find it more normal for guys to masturabate but let her be.
I think this is all a joke dear. Everyone is trolling x
So, you are happy about your daughter being unhappy twice? YOU ARE A FUCKING BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD FATHER!!!!!!
you are happy right? having an unhappy child with your choices and one much older hushband than her?!!! you are pervent did you know that? hope you will die soon so that child will be free. AND HOW THE FUCK CAN WE FIND WHO IS THAT PERSON BEHIND THAT ACCOUNT TO CALL THE POLICE? DOES ANYONE KNOW ???
Ur a horrible person homogay is okay . Homogay is okay HOMOGAY IS OKAY CHASTEFOREVER
So you would rather have a unhappy daughter who doesn’t get to make her own decisions than a happy and free one? I’m glad you’ve got your priorities straight you fucking idiot
i just cant even
so you let a pedophile marry your daughter is a blessing? Are you guys really that narrow minded?
Are people really that gullible? I’m guessing in America they are! Get a grip and see it for the joke it is. At least Christians can laugh at it. If it were ridiculing Allah, you’d get you head chopped off my some fanatical cunt!
Are people really that gullible? I’m guessing in America they are! Get a grip and see it for the joke it is. At least Christians can laugh at it. If it were ridiculing Allah, you’d get you head chopped off by some fanatical cunt!
This website is fantastic! Thanks for the lulz. Time to go beat my dick like it owes me money.
Well, good laugh. Time to go rub one out, smoke a bowl, pop a couple oxy and blast some Metallica
Metalica is a hell-satanic homogay band! 🙁
So is one direction but you love it.
And Metallica isn’t.
I purchased fifteen of these wonderful devices for my various children and they work wonderfully~
Thank you so much for this wonderful device!! ^3^
I am very happy that you are satisfied with your purchase. Praise on high! 🙂
And this is the exact reason why I’m not a Christian.
Because you enjoy the thought of kids masturbating? You’re right, they have another word for that.
There is a difference between letting children being their selves and discovering their body and sexuality and enjoying the thought of masturbating children!
No there isn’t.
Yes there is!
“No there isn’t!”
Man, after reading the article, and browsing the website, and reading the comments section, I STILL cannot decide if this site is real (and run by COMPLETE IDIOTS), or fake (and run by TOTAL GENIUSES). If the goal is to make Christianity look terrible, you are succeeding in the best possible way. IF the goal is to promote Christian ideals is a positive manner, you are FAILING in the worst possible way imaginable. Good luck either way, you’ll need it.
Since when you need consent from your own body to do something with it? Personaly I can’t recall an occasion in which my stomach gave me consent to eat..So I guess I have been force-feeding myself for the past 20 years.. Your body gives you consent -or not- for everything you do through your mind. It tells you to stop eating when your stomach aches or to stop running when you are out of breath. So masturbation is not self-rape. And I don’t really get the point of christianity being the religion of love towards other people when you are… Read more »
To all of you pedophile comedians that think that masturbating children are “a joke”.
Why don’t you visit your local children’s cancer AIDS ward, and tell the child rape victims how “funny” you think their situation is.
There will be a special place in triple-hell for heartless human waste like you.
You are the heartless human waste, you are the one blinded by your “religion of love” ready to tie up your child on a cross and make it feel bad for its body and sexuality. You are such a hypocrite. Why don’t you start a stop-rape campaing and try to help with a real problem rather than torturing physicaly and psychologicaly children?
Maybe you should try imagining someone locking you up in a machine that forced you to masturbate against your will just because his religion said it was a sin to not masturbate
I would very much like to hear precisely how Nikita is “such a hypocrite“. 🙂
Um… a machine that forces me to masturbate? Sir, can you please put the nurse in charge of you on the line?
You’d love it, you moron!
What I find so fucking hilarious is that there are people out there actually taking Nikita seriously…I’m in tears lmfao @ this….
There’s a special place in hell for haters bruhdah why u hatin on masturbation and homosexuals bruhdah
Because fuck you Jimmy Rustler, that’s why.
Ohh fantastic answer! Way to back up your meaningless argument! Really hard to argue with THAT logic! 😀 *starts slow clap*
And fuck you as well Ian Bertolini. (are you still clapping?) Tell your mom I said hello when you’re done. She’ll know what I mean.
-Continues the slow clap-
Niki means tell ur dad hi, by the way, he will know what u mean
im the president and I approve this message
Your stupidity burns much hotter than any hellfire you speak of, my good sir. The autism is strong with this one.
man everyone is retarted XD look at peoples names befor taking shit as real XD Eric Sean,Christina Mcierncock Rubrigh LOL good joke anyways got alot of people pissed off XD so linking this to my facebook p.s god is fake and so is this webpage its made to get you to add an email for them to sell to spam sites 🙂 hints why i registerd a fake 🙂
What’s wrong with their names? I don’t see any indication of their site being fake in it! I’m afraid this is fucking real. Some people really “think” like this!
Good lord you’re a moron.
I AM THE PRINCE OF DARKNESS, THE DARK LORD, THE DECEIVER, THE SERPENT OF OLD.
I AM MASTURBATING TO THE PHOTO OF THE BOUND CHILD.
LOL are they also in adult sizes? Time to get kinky
I am 15 years old, I smoke weed and masturbate everyday so my dad bought me one of these last week… unfortunately it has not worked. I grind on the top surface till I cum, and then fall asleep while my clothes are covered in cum, please pray for me 🙁
Praying at you.
It is a known fact that masturbation is developed in communist labs for purpose of draining the americans out of their precious bodily fluids.
Whoohahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀
It’s a known fact that even animals masturbate… the communists… right! 😀
the problem is they get more narrow minded then they already are
This is the type of shit that begins the chain of events that leads to school shootings in the kid’s future.
100% of school shooters masturbated. #themoreyouknow #Faithfacts #notevenonce
Yes and 100% of people who drink water die! Doing something natural won’t change you like that and that statistic is completely irrelevant. Idiot.
Carlos Danger; good name, coz that’s what you are: a danger to humanity! As I said before: of course they masturbated, at least they were normal at that point!
Every school shooter ate bread, so you are against bread too?
I taught my dog to un strap the middle part and with his rough tounge he lick it for me and does the job and all this time my hands are free…wierd right?
Religious fanaticism in its purest form. Next they’ll start stoning masturbators and nailing gays to crosses. I thought the human race had evolved beyond the dark ages. Oh oops these people don’t believe in evolution. Guess they’ll do like dinosaurs and eventually become extinct
Fingers crossed on the stonings brother!
Amen brother! All these liberal fanatics on here think that masturbation is SOOO great. Well ITS NOT. Anyway if a cross was good enough for Jesus, it’s good enough for my children.
so why waiting?
I’m literally unborn and I’m MASTURBATING bitch fuck ye
It’s blasphemous to put a HomoGay on a cross in the image of our savior Jesus. I am praying at you for suggesting it.
There are so many Christian f&%#wit morons in the US, nothing would surprise me, but I must think positive, realising that many American boys will no longer lose their eyesight.
This tickles my beam “bone”
Your fanatical shit … How about a treatment for schizoid?
Crazy with you is that construct the woes in the “land of freedom”!
After the call Brazil and the countries of South America underdeveloped?
Jesus Christ … You guys are crazy bastards bitten by some crazy worm!
Fuck you idiots!
Fuck you you liberal cocksucking cunt. I know for a fact the only reason you are against this device is because you want kids to explore their sexuality so they can be lured to the rape dens you run all across this country and underdeveloped countries. You’re just a sick old fuck who likes to cum on my 10 sons buttholes. Those are my buttholes! #Godloveseveryone #furryfuckdate #JesusisLord
Fucking bastards…
You and you fellows make this world a great shit to live!
Self rape? Are you sick?
I guess you were raped by a priest in your church!
Friend look for a treating!
http://www.minutodigital.com/imagenes2/imagen6.jpg
even the Lord do it!
AMEN!
U know a device like that is child abuse. Dont EVEN try to try me its not i was in ece. A device like this is forced restraint. U should be locked up at least in a looney bin. First a minister against gays which i personally gave a piece of my mind now u people agajnst masturbation. GET A LIFE
You’re the one that abuses children. You obviously want them out of this device so they can explore their sexuality with you. How many 12 year old boys have you touched this week. You even admitted you were in the ECE (Exploiting Children Everyday) so stop trying to act like you’re saving my children when I know they’re much better off in this device.
Why do you morons keep on confusing children masturbating with adults touching children?
You Christians fanatics are just freaks. People like you should not live in the 21st century, no wonder you guys stick around the suburbs cutting yourself away from normal people.
You’re the freak that loves to let children masturbate #Godisgood #Jesusislove #bronypower
Yeah, I’m pretty sure this device would be considered child abuse. You really need to get your values straight folks. Strapping a child into a crucifix to make sure they don’t masturbate…. that is truly evil.
Child abuse? Malarkey, if God didn’t want us strapping our children to anti-masturbation crosses, why did He make this device?
Well, since there is no such thing, or entity, as God, he/she/it didn’t make it – you did, child abusers!
Oh, god made it??? That changes everything!!! So he made it an just dropped it from heaven??? Well, than, in that case, it’s just great! Praise the lord! Hale-gerkin’-luya!!!
This device is a pedophile’s wet dream!! Restrain a child so they can’t struggle as they are molested. All these stupid bible thumpers are so worried about “self rape”(which is complete BS BTW), but they don’t seem to understand that it would totally leave an innocent child at the mercy of potentially harmful adults. Sickening!!! I REALLY hope this is all a joke. But either way, how scary that anybody would be willing to even entertain the thought of using it!!
Why would anyone joke about something so righteous and godly? Jesus died on the cross so that we could put our children on anti-masturbation crosses.
YOU MAKE ME PUKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
eh…i dont really think..thats true though. Thinking about it its kinda ridiculous dont y think?
Any normal human would´ve gotten that this is a joke at the word “anti masturbation cross”
Jesus came to me in a dream and told me to buy one for my 12 year old son son and my 3 daughters (they’re 7, 11, and 14). They work wonders to make them stop masturbating. The only problem now is they can’t get out of this contraption to fuck each other. How am I ever going to get a child that’ll keep my bloodline pure if my kids can’t fuck?
Im the president and I approve this message
Bruh moment