Family Values

Ten Common Names of Masturbators

(StopmasturbationNOW)—A lot of parents don’t take into account masturbation when they name their child. However did you know that a persons name is directly related to how much they masturbate? Here is a list of the top 5 boys and top 5 girls names for masturbation.

Babies-NamesBoys:
Acqwon
Darkeem
Barack
Jaquon
Keywon

Girls:
Latifah
Shaniqua
Latoya
Meg
Sha’Nay Nay

Parents, it is important that you remember to conform to social norms when raising your children, starting at the name you give them.

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Tim
Tim
5 years ago

Amen

marjan393
5 years ago

that’s what you made of it. You have the dirty thought when it come to names.

Jimmy
Jimmy
5 years ago

Marjan393, you look kinda cute. Why don’t you post a picture of your breasts so we can all have some fun at tonight’s circle jerk?

Praise

Fart Nocker
Fart Nocker
5 years ago

Are you fucking nuts? Holy SHIT.

Andy Manning
5 years ago

Shuntayvious Primes-Willis . A REAL masturbator’s name.

Lucifer
Lucifer
5 years ago

IM FUCKING YOUR BITCH SHA’ NAY NAY CUM ALL OVER THAT JUICY ASS PUSSY PRAY FOR THAT BITCH

Pamela
Pamela
5 years ago

Wow ok racist much?

John
John
5 years ago

What’s better than yanking your cock

Alex
Alex
5 years ago

Wow. Much racism. Such idiocy.

ciumaca
ciumaca
5 years ago

Hey guys!!! You forget the medieval and antic rock stars, everpresent from then on, like jESUs aLLAh etc. I think they should fill that list.

Violet Minnelli
Violet Minnelli
4 years ago

This has got to be the most fucking hilarious thing I have ever read in my life… There is no way that anyone can take this as anything but satire and a joke…. And if it’s not that’s how I see it. Masturbation is freaking awesome!!!