Every once in a while in the world of popular music, a rebellious artist is able to sneak something past the liberal controlled Government and Big Masturbation censors. Even in the case of two of the songs featured in this article, the artists were able to get the message through after being heavily censored by their Big Masturbation controlled record labels. Regardless, I’m sure the average non-normal masturbator has no idea the songs playing while they are committing their filthy acts are actually condemning them.
3. Phil Collins – In The Air Tonight
Phil Collins was previously the drummer and sometimes vocalist for some random hippy jam band from the 1970s called “Genesis”. Around the late 1970s, Collins stumbled out of his drug induced haze and decided that Genesis was wrongly taking a Biblical name to promote their depraved druggie music. Collins then, wisely, decided to record his own solo album of original material that he ended up calling “Face Value”. Collins wastes exactly zero time letting his listeners know this is a huge shift for him with the lead-off track, “In The Air Tonight”.
“In The Air Tonight” details an experience Collins had walking in on another, unnamed, famous musician at one of the final Genesis concerts before he went solo. “I was there and I saw what you did, saw it with my own two eyes” is the really telling line that shows that Collins is not hesitating to throw this masturbator under the bus and out him for the deviant that he is. One can speculate that Collins is stopping just short of ratting out an otherwise wholesome and perceived anti-masturbation advocate with the line “But I know the reason why you keep your silence up, no you don’t fool me.” It has been rumored since the song’s release that the individual Phil Collins caught self-raping was none other than alleged Christian musician Carman Licciardello.
#2. Elvis Presley – Hound Dog
In the 1950s you could not get more American than Elvis Presley. He was American, a normal and shot a bunch of people while serving in the American War Machine. It’s nearly inconceivable that something this Great American Hero had his strong hands on could get him censored by the Big Masturbation controlled entertainment industry. Alas, the troubled recording of the song “Hound Dog” was just the beginning of dark times for Presley as the Nation slid further down into the muck that was the 1960s and 1970s. Mr. Presley, the ever proud American, even justifiably faked his death and moved to his own sovereign island nation in the Pacific Ocean to avoid the slide into depravity that came once again in the 1990s.
Elvis originally went into the studio and recorded a version of “Hound Dog” with the same music but slightly different lyrics. The song, originally titled “Masturbator”, was submitted to his record label who instantly rejected the song as “not fitting the morals of our company”. This reasoning confused Presley as the song was a staunch anti-masturbation thesis that was filled with lyrics condemning a fictional masturbator. Needless to say, the core of the song was left intact, especially the part about the masturbator, I mean “dog”, not being “high class” and “no friend of mine”. The official explanation given to Presley’s management was that the switch to the dog metaphor was better because “nobody gives a damn about dogs.”
1. Johnny Cash – The Man Comes Around
Johnny Cash wrote this song about Lonnie Childs. Just listen to the whole thing. I’ll wait.
“When The Man Comes Around”, originally titled “When Lonnie Childs Comes Around”, was a volley directed at the Big Masturbation controlled music industry from Cash in his final days. As Cash was ailing during the recording of the American IV album, he gave in rather quickly to the label’s demands that he make changes to the song; however, Cash, ever the craftsman still gets the point of the song across by only changing the name “Lonnie Childs” to “The Man”. The censors were none the wiser and as Cash stated, “Lonnie Childs is ‘the man’, so this works, whatever.” One other minor change was the ending narration where the phrase “And I looked and behold: a pale horse. And his name, that sat on him, was Death. And Hell followed with him.” was originally “And I looked and behold: a pale man. And his name, that God gave him, was Lonnie. And Senator Weisz followed with him”. It is speculated that this change was forced by the liberal entertainment industry due to Cash’s known association with Big Masturbation lifelong enemy, President Richard Nixon.