Foreigners / Politics / World

Mystery Tunnel Proof Majority of Canadians Trying to Flee Into the USA

tunnel(StopMasturbationNow)—Canadian SS squads recently uncovered a massive underground tunnel dug near the Pan American games site in the Canadian capital of Toronto. Initially Canadian authorities were baffled at the mysterious tunnel.

The mysterious tunnel measured more than 6 feet in height, nearly 3 feet in width and about 33 feet in length, Toronto Police Deputy Chief Mark Saunders told reporters Tuesday.

Plywood walls were reinforced with wooden supports. The tunnel was 10 feet underground, with a ladder leading down to the chamber. Police also found a gas can, food and beverage containers, work gloves, a wheel barrow and moisture-resistant light bulbs in the tunnel, which has been filled in. Its entrance was concealed by dirt over a wood lid.

“We don’t know whether someone is building one somewhere else,” Saunders said. “I’m open to anything right now.”

SMN sources have investigated this and other events and come to the realization that Canadians are trying to escape the horror of their socialist captivity. “Canadians crave democracy, American values, and strong leadership, none of these can be found in Canada” said Lonnie Childs while on tour in Calgary Alberta “And when they get to the US, they are harder to identify than the Mexicans, what we have here are Snow Mexicans.

Canada US relations are at an all-time low with Canada hoarding much of the North American oil.  “Why should Canada get the oil, the continent is called America for a reason” said Dr Childs.  “Manifest destiny has never been finished.”

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Truffle
5 years ago

We don’t want no more non-normal, illegals in this country! America was doing just fine until the Bangladeshis invaded.

A Smart Guy
A Smart Guy
5 years ago

Why would people leave Canada? It’s like America but better

Brother Remo
Brother Remo
5 years ago

Hey, I live in Calgary! Is Lonnie still here? I would like to meet him? Praise!!!

Cody
Cody
5 years ago

You are a bunch retarded twats. Who the fuck wants to go to your brainwashed, hippocratic country. Your “freedom” is a joke. Your one bad decision from a military draft with no economy to support it, a melting pot of a society that refuses to think for itself, and soley hates the MOTHER FUCKING ELECTED leader of their country because he isn’t white! I’m white, I work hard for my family, and I have no need to come across this shit playing Canadians for simpleton low life’s. Doesn’t this sound something like how the Jews fucked over nazi Germany. That… Read more »

Davina
Davina
5 years ago

Why are Americans such a bunch of thick wankers?

Joe
Joe
5 years ago

Fact: the tunnels were built by two college kids looking for a place to hang out. Fact the tunnel does not lead to the U.S. Check you geography but the U.S. has Lake Ontario between Toronto and New York (nearest state). Idiots.

Intellectual Canadian
Intellectual Canadian
5 years ago

I think i became more intellectually stupid, for reading this.

First and foremost. You’re stupid. Learn. Ottawa is the capital of Canada.

Second. Please actually do research you imbecile. Because it has “America” in the name, does not make it only American. You’re stupid.

Third. Why must you make yourself look stupid? Do you have no dignity?

Forth. War of 1812. DEAL WITH IT.