Heroes Of Anti-Masturbation: James Springer White

James Springer White, of the somewhat liberal Seventh Day Adventist movement was an unlikely hero of anti-masturbation. White, also known as Elder White, was a prolific author who penned such tomes as Word to the Little Flock, The Sounding of the Seven Trumpets of Revelation 8 & 9, and wrote Sign of the Times, 133 years before non-normal, sexual predator “Prince” took false credit for it.

White’s claim to advocating against masturbation came in 1870, when we are led to believe his lesser-gendered spouse, Ellen G. White, wrote a book called A Solemn Appeal Relative to Solitary Vice, and the Abuses and Excesses of the Marriage Relation. Elder White is credited as “editor” of the book, however, everyone knows that, especially in the 1800s, lesser-gendereds weren’t allowed to have independent thoughts or write books. Clearly there was some chicanery from the liberals at the Seventh Day Adventist church that caused this book to be erroneously attributed to James White’s spouse.

In this book, “Ellen” puts out James’s findings that if masturbation is continued after age fifteen, nature itself will intervene and punish the masturbator with great suffering. James then proves that masturbation is the cause of most, if not all diseases acquired by masturbators after age thirty: “…especially from the ages of thirty to forty-five, by numerous pains in the system, and various diseases, such as affection of the liver and lungs, neuralgia, rheumatism, affection of the spine, diseased kidneys, and cancerous tumors.”

James Springer White

James Springer White – Anti-Masturbation Hero and First Man to Prove Without A Doubt That Women Are Crazy (photo source: public domain)

James White also makes the groundbreaking conclusion that , “there is often a sudden breaking down of the constitution; and death is the result.”

Elder White also spoke briefly on the disgusting practice of female masturbation by saying: “The result of self-abuse in them (lesser-gendereds) is seen in various diseases, such as catarrh, dropsy, headache, loss of memory and sight, great weakness in the back and loins, affections of the spine, and frequently, inward decay of the head. Cancerous humor, which would lie dormant in the system their lifetime, is inflamed, and commences its eating, destructive work. The mind is often utterly ruined, and insanity supervenes.”

Elder White should be commended for being among the first to not only prove that masturbation causes diseases and inevitably leads to death; but for the world shattering finding that female masturbation is the cause of wild lesser-gendereds being out of their minds.

While definitely not an equal to even the most simple of men, at least a lesser-gendered that has accepted their role and taken the vow to never masturbate is more sane than the wanton and crazed female masturbator. And we can thank James Springer White for coming to these amazing and important conclusions. Praise you, Elder White.

R.I.P. – James Springer White (1821 – 1881)

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6 years ago

Now this is the kind of history that needs to be taught in schools.

6 years ago

Anyone with the surname, White, should be trusted… Apart from Barry, he was a non-normal.

Pubic Hands Anderson
Pubic Hands Anderson
6 years ago

If Lonnie saves me, will the hair on my palms go away?