(StopMasturbationNOW)–Our leader Lonnie Childs has so far perfectly predicted the NCAA basketball tournament. What make his picks unique is that he made his predictions before the NCAA selection committee even announced the brackets and seeding. When asked what his secret was Dr Lonnie Childs responded that he uses a formula that incorporated the race of the players, the schools, and his preservation of bodily fluids. He correctly summarized that the pac-12 would go undefeated and that the more conservative sates would win.
Praise Lonnie and his wisdom, we hope that this is another example of why people should turn to Lonnie for guidance in all aspects of their lives.
Dr Childs always had the knack for basketball prognostication. His ability was first noticed back in the late 1980’s when he predicted the ascension of Detlef Shempf and Ewe Blab to basketball prominence. Still those two are denied hall of fame considerations because of the color of their skin. Prejudice is a horrible thing.