Celebrity

Snow Mexican Bieber Blasted For Non-Normal Denouncement, Promoting Abstinence From Masturbation.

WEST PALM BEACH, FLA (SMMNN) – Snow Mexican entertainer Justin Bieber has become Big Masturbation’s newest whipping boy after a video of him decrying non-normals and promoting abstinence from masturbation was leaked to the press earlier this week. In typical fashion, the media responded by blasting Bieber mercilessly calling his words “racist” and “extremist”.

In the video, Bieber is shown changing the lyrics of his apparent “hit song” ‘One Less Lonely Girl’ to feature a treatise on the valueless nature of all non-normals and advocating masturbation abstinence. An anonymous source revealed the video was filmed earlier in Bieber’s life, “before he was mind controlled and programmed by Big Masturbation. It represents his true, core values he was raised with.”

Bieber, speaking through a different anonymous source, released the following statement defending his actions on the video:

“As a youngster, I was raised with strong normal values, despite being a Snow Mexican. My career as a pop musician has been the most shameful period of my young life. I gave up my values, I gave up my belief system for the ultimately unfulfilling fame and fortune my handlers achieved for me. I value my upbringing and my time converting to become a normal as a young child more than anything else. I am a man who knows my responsibility to the world and will not make the the mistake of turning my back on my belief system again.”

Bieber’s location at press time was unknown, but it was believed this video may have been leaked due to his going AWOL from his closely controlled and monitored compound in California. It is mere speculation at this early hour, but it’s becoming a more plausible scenario that this video was leaked to the press by Big Masturbation in an attempt to “ruin” Bieber’s popular entertainment career.

It was reported late Wednesday evening that a representative from Lonnie Child’s Stop Masturbation Now organization had possibly reached out to Bieber to offer him asylum and support if his statements recently were in fact his true feelings.

More updates as they become available.


Cathy Redmond, reporting for StopMasturbationNow.org.

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Christina Mcierncock Rubright

Asylum directly into the Menstrual Hut. Amen!

Itsagirl?
Itsagirl?
6 years ago

Is it true miley cirus and justien bieber are ine and the same and that the alter ego controlled by big mastrubation is the scantily clad miley? And if so would it be right to fornicate with the alter ego as a sorta “wake up” call to actualy being a snow mexican boy? Or would that be a gayhomo thing to think and do??