Post Tagged with: "Justin Bieber"

Holy Man Bieber Charged With Wasting Eggs; Vandalism

Holy Man Bieber Charged With Wasting Eggs; Vandalism

NEW YORK, NEW YORK, NEW YORK — (SMNNN)  Former pop artist and Lonvidian rising star, Justin Bieber, failed in an attempt to justify vandalism he allegedly committed against his neighbor back in January. Bieber’s legal team contended that the “egg throwing” was for “religious purposes” and not a random act […]

by July 10, 2014 7 comments Celebrity
Holy Man Bieber snubbed in attempt to convert actor DiCaprio

Holy Man Bieber snubbed in attempt to convert actor DiCaprio

CANNES, FREEDOM — (SMNNN) Hollywood slave “Leonardo DiCaprio”, probably best known for his role as the titular Private Ryan in ‘Saving Private Ryan’, snubbed recently baptized and confirmed Lonvidian, Justin Bieber, over the weekend. Bieber, now operating on behalf of the Stop Masturbation Now Ministries, was on a conversion and […]

by June 13, 2014 2 comments Celebrity, World
Snow Mexican Bieber Blasted For Non-Normal Denouncement, Promoting Abstinence From Masturbation.

Snow Mexican Bieber Blasted For Non-Normal Denouncement, Promoting Abstinence From Masturbation.

WEST PALM BEACH, FLA (SMMNN) – Snow Mexican entertainer Justin Bieber has become Big Masturbation’s newest whipping boy after a video of him decrying non-normals and promoting abstinence from masturbation was leaked to the press earlier this week. In typical fashion, the media responded by blasting Bieber mercilessly calling his words […]

by June 8, 2014 3 comments Celebrity
How Fast Were YOU Masturbating?

How Fast Were YOU Masturbating?

War. Earthquakes. Terrorists. Pot. Cancer. Snakes. Masturbation. Human life is unpredictable and fragile. Disaster may strike at any point. No amount of money, fame, or success will save those of us that have sinned in the eyes of our Lord. The following celebrities have learned this lesson firsthand. A famous […]

by June 3, 2014 8 comments Disciples
Self-Rape is NOT a Victimless Crime.  Masturbation:  Not Even Once.

Self-Rape is NOT a Victimless Crime. Masturbation: Not Even Once.

As we all know, masturbation deaths come in fours.  Please share these memers with your friends, family, and co-workers.  Praise!

by May 21, 2014 5 comments Celebrity, Death, Morals
Help Stop Masturbation Now!
Get the latest content first.
We respect your privacy.