NATURE- SMNNN
Throughout nature, we at B.L.U.F.F and The Foundation For A Better Tomorrow have found a plethora of disgusting natural objects that codify self-rape, but perhaps none is so blatantly obviously created to be a foul dingus as that demonic penis-resembling fruit: the banana.
THE AGENDA
Here we see Mexicans harvesting bananas, which will fund ISIS, surely
The agenda of this yellow phallus shaped succulent fruit is unclear. Try as though we might, we have yet to be able to get the bananas to admit to anything intelligible.
But what is crystal clear, is that bananas resemble gigantic penises, and are grown in South Mexico and Greater Asian Micronesian Ornament, by depraved non-normal and primitive Mexicans and Communist Ornamentals, both species of which have been shown to pose contagious masturbation dangers to law abiding Normals.
Here Communists harvest bananas, and use the profits to fund ISIS, surely.
THE RESEMBLANCE
Clearly, I mean, really (vomits)
It is very obvious, I mean, c’mon, just take a gander. A banana could not look anymore like a penis, right down to the pointy tip and heinous brown spots. Clearly this is a self-rape trigger, and should be avoided, possibly quelled, as it looks just like a penis. Looking like a penis, as bananas certainly do, is just disgusting, and will cause sin, inviting Satan right into our homes, so we can fall, right into his trap! The deviousness!
AIMED AT YOUTH
Won’t somebody please, think of the children?!
Bananas, championed by “mainstream medicine” as healthy snack, are often offered to school children, public school children, no less, who our tax dollars pay to feed, and are often non-Normal. This disgusting, non-segregated, cuisine and diet plan, only ensures degradation of the already highly diluted Normals culture, and way of life, already in decline in theses dark days of the pre-Coming of The Apocalypse.
Encouraging young Normals, and larval non-Normals, to engage in simulated acts of oral sex, with a Satanic fruit, that may cause self-rape triggering, is just too much, and frankly, is an outrage!
Thanks Obama! (sarcasm)
THE SOLUTION
Bananas need to be removed from the public, and public schools now! If bananas aren’t banned, then we all might as well be gullible whores for Satan, with big “Vacancy” signs over the metaphorical, prolapsed, anuses of our souls!
Praise!
Tf is this I’m hoping it’s a joke cause wtf
Even worse than the banana is the macho plantain.
In south america it is known as the penis fruit.
Banana peels are also very dangerous. There are reports of young men warming it up in their microwaves and then putting it in between the cushions of their sofas to simulate vaginal skin. I believe they call it “banana peel fapping”. While I think this is a bit better than homos sticking bananas up their anuses, why don’t they just get a Christian housewife like a normal man? I don’t even have to ask my wife permission when I want to have sex with her.
You don’t ask permission? Doesn’t that count as rape if she doesn’t consent?
what the actual fuck, what did bananas ever do to you?
I can’t wait to try this! Thanks for the idea ?
Ads on this page, surely to fund isis
Did I catch a masterbater? ou’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! You and the stranger both like roleplay. You: Hi Stranger: dude here You: 23 F Russia Stranger: oh hi! Lou here, 29 You: Nice Stranger: what,s your name, love? You: Eriska Stranger: Sexy! You: Thank you You: This is me by the way http://i1155.photobucket.com/albums/p544/toto242/2011-6-11.jpg Stranger: oh thank you I was gonna ask, just a sec Stranger: wow, you’re really pretty You: Thank you Stranger: i’ll send you one…what do you want to see? You: I don’t really care to see a picture Stranger: oh ok Stranger:… Read more »
That is at least Double-Hell.
and don’t get me started on cucumbers
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DFybEmkTUCw Beams of fire sweep through my head Thrusts of pain increasingly engaged Sensory receptors succumb I am no one now only agony My crimson liquid so frantically spilled the ruby fluid of life unleashed Ripples ascend to the surface of my eyes Their red pens drawing at random, at will A myriad pains begotten in their wake the bastard spawn of a mutinous self The regurgitation of my micro nemesis salivating red at the prospect of my ruin, my doom Malfunction the means for its ascent Bloodletting the stringent voice to beckon my soul So futile any resisting tension… Read more »
You are totally insane.
The dark age in front of our screen.
Go see some psychologist, some psychiatrist. Get some medicine.
I’m fine with medicine. As long as it is not the devil’s weed (marijuana), it is fine with me. I have developed a particular fondness for Quaalude and Oxycontin. The good ole legal drugs like tea, coffee, tobacco and alcohol are also fine. As long as it is not that smelly green stuff the non-normals smoke.
Speaking of bananas. I think in going to go suck on one while I shove another on up my but hole and rub my penis with a bandanna peel! I think I caught the masturbating fever!
“Bananas to fund ISIS”
Hahaha I’m dead guys?
Please continue with stories like this; always guarantees a good laugh
PS:
I masturbated once but don’t worry I repented myself by doing as the pastor told me; I now only self rape in front of pictures of our holy lord
You know what’s worse than bananas ? THIS WHOLE FUCKING WEBSITE YOU DUMB ASS SHIT EATERS.
Guys, I’m pretty sure God created that fruit with the entire intention of benefiting us with natural sugars and potassium. Both necessary things for us to function in our every day lives. It’s the perverted people, such as yourselves, who take this thing on to a WHOLE other level because you can’t get your mind out of the gutter. I really, really hope that this entire site is a joke because half of this stuff is made up and actually gave me a really good laugh. Not only that, but the fact that you think that the Mexicans are selling… Read more »
I am lying in bed in a tender nightie and I am thinking about all the naughty things that others are afraid just to say. I am stroking my body by all fingers, I am changing rhythm and pressure. I love it! And then it comes – ecstasy and euphoria. And again and again. It’s the best feeling on the world and I will never stop doing it!!!! 😛
Btw. I used everything around me – a bottle of coca cola, a cucumber and also a long hard BANANA which was – at the end – totally melted 😛
this makes me want to use bananas as a self-rape toy
Friendly reminder that this whole website, including this article, is satirical. I mean come on, anuses of our souls? This is satire. Here’s a picture from pocket camp.