(StopMasturbationNow)—Lebron James is a well-known masturbator. The Le Batard family is a well-known bastion of moral values. On Christmas day Lebron and the Cleveland Lebrons entered a game in Miami with a fairly respectable record of 17 wins and 10 losses. After the Miami Heat thoroughly defeated the Cleveland Lebrons with Papi Le Batard in attendance. The next day Papi recorded this:
Since this recording was made, Cleveland’s season has fallen apart. Cleveland has now doubled its loss total from 10 to 20 while only winning two games. They now stand at a disgusting 19-20, a slide that even Mack Browns brother Watson would be embarrassed about.
In other Sports news:
Peyton Manning
Tim Tebow has Better Denver Bronco playoff record than Peyton Manning.
After this weekend’s loss to the Colts, Peyton Manning now has three losses as quarterback of the Broncos and only two wins giving him a .400 win percentage. Tim Tebow has a .500 win percentage. Just a reminder to John Elway that had you kept Tim, you would have won like 8 super bowls by now instead of zero.
Nothing divine can intervene in a sports game
Except for God’s will, of course.
Your God that doesn’t exist
If God doesn’t exist then why are you talking about him?
You men your God that doesn’t exist?
Oh yeah, fix your mobile support. The keyboard just randomly shuts down causing me to press “post”. That’s why there is duplicate comments.
You might consider buying a better phone. Stop Masturbation Now recommends using a Windows Phone powered by Bing.
You recommended the Windows phone? Now I’m getting an iPhone. And I’m talking about God because this is a religious site.
O Holy Shit！