Lonnie Childs Wins Land Dispute, Residents of Navajo Tribal Land under Forced Relocation

Safford, AZ – In a shocking landmark resolution, The Supreme Court has ordered the removal of Navajo Indians from tribal land, granting the 50,000 acres of prime real estate to Lonnie Childs, a local squatter who first claimed rights to the property over 15 years ago.

Lonnie Child’s lawyer, Saul Rubenstein, used a brilliant defense for Mr. Childs, citing the government led forced

Homeowners relocating after the Supreme Court Decision.

removal of Native Americans from Arizona in 1863. Referred to as the Long Walk to Bosque Redondo (known in Navajo as Hwéeldi), the Navajo were forced to walk up to thirteen miles a day at gunpoint from their reservation in what is now Arizona to eastern New Mexico. Some 53 different forced marches occurred between August 1864 and the end of 1866.

“They just didn’t stick to the rules,” Rubenstein stated, “and that’s what led to our victory in this case. If they would have stayed in New Mexico where the government put them in the first place, we wouldn’t be dealing with this nonsense.”

Lonnie Childs, who has been claiming “squatter’s rights” on the property for more than a decade, will now be one of the largest property owners in the state. The land includes residential homes and one casino, which has been a topic of discussion among residents at the BLUFF Campound ( a religious retreat/university/community outside of Stafford, AZ).

The Navajo Spirit Wind Casino, which will now be the “Nikita Shallavin Sexual Orientation Conversion Facility and Home for Gay Marriage Orphan Babies.”

“We just wanted to burn that sin hole to the ground,” stated Justine Meadors, a resident of the community. “But Lonnie had other ideas, and he’s always right. We’ve decided to turn it into a positive force for the community. Nikita Shallavin, a member of the community and fellow Lonvidian, will be using the now deserted casino to promote his “Holy Sexology” classes, where he takes part as a Sexual Orientation Conversion Therapist. “If you or your loved one are suffering from unwanted same-sex attractions or masturbation, I can help,” claims Nikita. The new facility will be called the “Nikita Shallavin Sexual Orientation Conversion Facility and Home for Gay Marriage Orphan Babies.”

Indian Bob, Navajo Spokesperson and All Around Good Guy.

Not everyone is happy, however. Oyuba Kawita, also known as Indian Bob in the community, is the spokesperson and Casino Chair Elect for the Nevada Gaming Commission’s Indian Affairs Bureau. “This is heap bad news for us,” Indian Bob stated. “Fair isFair. This good deal for white man. No hard Feeling.”