Safford, AZ- in an amazing show of Lonnie’s power and the love of our Lord, youth at our annual BLUFF Teen Campaway outing performed a 65 hour prayer circle for the janitor on site.
Unaware that he was being prayed for, James Willford, a former agnostic and admitted African-American, claims he began seeing changes in just one day.
“I wakes up and look at my skin, and say Oh Lord, Praise you Lonnie!” he exclaimed with tears in his eyes. “I’s gonna go out today and get a job as a banker man!”
Teens on site stated that they noticed his unfortunately dark skin early in the week. “We got off the bus and I was like, hold up, y’all look! It’s a real colored man,” said Jeremiah Collard, head youth assistant and highly sought after by all the young girls on the Campound. “I knew we could change him. I knew he could be normal. I knew Lonnie’s love could work miracles!
Since this story broke, James has been almost 87% converted to normal, and says he’s “seriously thinkins about getting me a white girl now. Course, I be talkin about marryin’ her and all. Soon as I get my whole body normal.”
Studies have shown that, with constant support and a strict diet, Coloreds have a 46% chance of remaining self-rape free.
I thought this was a magic trick at first, but then I saw this man pick-up a book and started to read it. The book didn’t have any pictures in it either. This was a true miracle.
I couldn’t believe that we had finally found a cure for these non same race non normals, I’m sure it wont be long now until everyone accepts Lonnie into their lives. Praise!!
Praise Lonnie. Another few miracles like this and there would be no need for welfare and prison. However, it would be bad news for KFC and the watermelon farmers.
Wow!!!! Racist much???
Exactly how can increasing the life opportunitys of this charming young coloured man, be in anyway construed as racist?
Check yourself Mr, YOU are the reason the non normal man has been kept down in this country for so many years, you and your LIEbral.
I heard after he turned normal,this young man returned all the things he had stolen after years of crime and turned himself into the police for punishment.
in general im against all forms of racial mixing. but that cover photo looks great! 😀 praise to the man!
I actually heard him tell another Brother that he doesn’t like grape soda anymore!!! Praise Lonnie!!
I’m lovin’ the campaways. I gets to renew my expertise in explosives with impro-booby traps that shock and scare the devil outta them little scamps!
No limbs are harmed, except maybe a skin burn or two.
It doesn’t kill them, so it must make them stronger.
I bet his credit rating will skyrocket!
Persistent prayer circles are the way to go. Faithfact.
so is this fake or?
Silly Athetit, why don’t you ask your leader, Dicky Dawkins. He thinks he knows it all.
He has a skin disorder mad cow disease if I remember correctly lol
wouw, you re all completely crazy on this site full of lies and completely absurd facts, open your eyes guys and girls and come back to the ground
Ist diese Seite Satire? Oder für leichtgläubige Christen und Nazis?
Da sind keine Nazis hier, ausser DIR. Please read my article on teaching a history lesson at masturbators.
ya this shit is whack
Wtf, there nothing wrong with black ppl being black. Ow hat Jeremiah said is offensive and so racist.
Stop the racism. It’s ppl like u Lonnie that cause everybody to call white ppl racist. Ur an embarrassment.