Morals / Science / Self-Rape Prevention

Can Smoking Help Prevent Masturbation?

(Stop Masturbation Now)— Smoking has gotten an unfair bad reputation recently. The truth is that smoking can reduce masturbation desires up to 50%. When one smokes two things happen. One, the hands are busy and therefore do not wander to the sin regions of the body. Second, the after effects of smoking leaves the body in a state in which it is less interested in raping itself.

 

As you can see by new data provided by the Foundation for a Better Tomorrow Smoking radically reduces masturbation rates.
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As masturbation is a top ten cause of disease, smoking is a much safer alternative to masturbation. Stop Masturbation NOW highly recommends RJ Reynolds brand tobacco products.

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Lonnie Childs
Admin
6 years ago

The word “cigarette” has such a negative connotation these days. I prefer the term “nicotene delivery system” when referring to RJ Reynolds fine tobacco products.

Bishop Smith
Bishop Smith
6 years ago
Reply to  Lonnie Childs

If she smokes, then she pokes. Smoking really does prevent masturbation. Hallelujah!

@ThatMetalKid14
6 years ago
Reply to  Bishop Smith

Smoking:
Harms nearly every organ of the body
Causes many diseases and reduces the health of smokers in general

Smoking is the leading preventable cause of death in the United States.

Cigarette smoking causes more than 480,000 deaths each year in the United States. This is about one in five deaths.
Smoking causes more deaths each year than all of these combined:4
Human immunodeficiency virus (HIV)
Illegal drug use
Alcohol use
Motor vehicle injuries
Firearm-related incidents

WAKE UP YOU STUPID FUCKING DUMBASSES!

Bob
Bob
5 years ago

Agreed! At least there’s one sane person here.

Nucky Goldberg
Nucky Goldberg
6 years ago

Praise!

Truffle
6 years ago

I’m so grateful that even lesser gendereds can enjoy the smooth taste of an RJ Reynolds tobacco stick.

Liam McKey
6 years ago

Big Masturbation wants you to think that cigarettes cause cancer.

God... Ya, even God thinks you're stupid
God... Ya, even God thinks you're stupid
5 years ago
Reply to  Liam McKey

I think this is actually the dumbest thing I’ve ever read…

Puddin' Pounder
Puddin' Pounder
6 years ago

I prefer to use chewing tobacco so that both of my hands are free to massage my Devil’s Stick.

The Knob Gobbler
The Knob Gobbler
6 years ago

My pastor calls his cock the “Cuban cigarillo” and he has me smoke it regularly. Does that count?

leonni sucks dick
leonni sucks dick
6 years ago

Fuck leonni childs he is a masterbator

Erik
Erik
6 years ago

You guys are fucking idiots

subgenreentertainment
6 years ago

Omg this is such a joke….

François Détritivore

I prefer to killing my lunges than killing my soul.

Aaron Sullivan
5 years ago

You Don’t have to quit you can us vapormasterbation its totally hands free and nonsinning!

doc
doc
5 years ago

I taught my daughter how to smoke so she would stop masturbating but she became a Sufi instead and now masturbates regularly

DextarClaw9
5 years ago

haaaahh hah wow dude wow.

timmy
timmy
5 years ago

u guys are retards

Louise Quinn Herron
5 years ago

the reason the chart went down is because people died from smoking. ahahahaha you are all fucking idiots.

Children are starving to death in other countries put your time in to raising money for that if you’re so christian or whatever.
Mastrubation isn’t a problem. World hunger is.

ICantFuckingBeliveThis
ICantFuckingBeliveThis
5 years ago

Oh my god, this is a joke right, this has to be a joke, this whole site is shit and its filled with lies . What’s the difference between my fingers and someone else’s? I can’t believe this site exists, I’m not going to die of lung cancer, just so I can go to heaven, you guys are extremist freaks.

Lonnie Childs
5 years ago

Anyone wanna help me masturbate?
Love
Lonnie Childs

HomoGay
HomoGay
5 years ago
Reply to  Lonnie Childs

I do, I do

Riley
5 years ago

MURDERING YOUR LUNGS ISNT A PROBLEM JUST HYPOTHETICALLY DISPLEASING A MADE UP FIGURE THAT KIND OF GETS MAD WHEN YOU TOUCH YOUR DICK. THATS A FUCKING PROBLEM. NOT THE MILLIONS OF PEOPLE DYING FROM SMOKING. FUCK THE CHRISTIANS.

cocbern68
cocbern68
2 years ago

Just seeing if I can indeed comment on anything or if even the initial troll is fabricated.