(StopMasturbationNOW)— This morning a Florida man was masturbating when the friction of him touching his sinstick caused a firenado. As we know masturbation is wrong and the wages of self-rape are death. Please remember to help work to make masturbation illegal.
Masturbator Unleashes Firenado!
Author: augustweisz
I’d like to see science explain THAT! Checkmate atheists.
How the heck do you know what this “god” guy made a firenado, or “satan” or whatever. The guy was unsafe around a fire and it spread. Masturbation doesn’t cause fire. My bedroom isn’t in flames.
I was there,
I was walking through the charred remains and kicked something solid. Turns out it was the pickup truck cigarette lighter,
I’ll be damned.
Having spent a few hours in Florida once, I can tell you it’s a dirty swamp filled with masturbators.
Seems legit
Wait. That pic is edited. I can prove it to you. The flames are not colors of real flames and are a mistake from the editor.
I live in Florida, you sir, have not been to Florida. While we do have swamps, most of our lands are woods, and urban areas.
Yet more untruths from Lonnie “the liar” Childs. So much for “thou shalt not bare false witness”