While a water spout is often weaker than most of its land counterparts, stronger versions spawned by bodies of water with high semen content do occur. Waterspouts do not suck up water. The water seen in the main funnel cloud is actually semen droplets formed by the chemical reaction of […]
B.L.U.F.F. AZ – The Foundation for a Better Tomorrow, along with NASA, has determined that self rape residues in the atmosphere are at unsafe levels in many areas of the United States. The FFBT and NASA, as part of a joint taxpayer funded coalition, has been measuring the levels of […]
(StopMasturbationNOW)— The great Blizzard of 2016 is rolling up the east coast and with it people are staying home to avoid the snow and bad roads. Unfortunately a consequence of this is people have much more free time and isolation which is a recipe for masturbation disaster. In Baltimore alone […]
SAFFORD AZ (SMNNN) A chilling result of a study, released by Brother Lonnie’s University of Faithfacts, and The Foundation For A Better Tomorrow, entitled: “Masturbation Residue And It’s Effects On The Global Climate “ outlines the direct impact of the masturbator and it’s filth, on the peaceful, God-fearing innocent peoples […]
SMNNN (WASHINGTON D.C.) Weather.com reports rain and thunderstorms in the Washington D.C. today, following the landmark decision by the Supreme Court to recognize gay homosex marriage and queerosexual unions, and to disobey the Lord and his holy wishes, ultimately ushering in the Rapture, signifying the beginning of the end of […]
(StopMasturbationNOW)—Praise Lonnie Childs! The Calbuco volcano in the Mexican state of Chile continued erupting for the second week causing over 6500 people to flee their mud huts. The ash and fire has reportedly shot as high as 40,000 feet. About 1,500 people in Ensenada, in the foothills of the volcano, […]
(StopMasturbationNow)—Our Leader Lonnie in his infinite wisdom and glory has prayed for a winter storm like no other to bury liberal northeastern states. This will once and for all prove that global warming is a liberal hoax. Already called the storm of the century, a Blizzard is currently working its […]
Turkmenistan- (SMNNN) In the backward and primitive sand covered land of Turkmenistan, the Portal To Hell, a large super-natural fire filled hole in the ground, powered by the Earth’s release of natural gas, and God’s rage, has increased by 27% in intensity since last year. Faithscientists place the blame squarely […]
The Bureau of Meteorology has revised their “El Niño” prediction for 2015 down to a 50 per cent chance yesterday. This comes after their earlier issued prediction of a 70 per cent or greater chance of “El Niño” impacting Americans next year. Faith Scientists have also been warning of extreme weather […]
YELLOWSTONE NATIONAL PARK/ PORTAL TO HELL (SMNNN) The Yellowstone super volcano is due for the largest eruption ever seen in the 8,000 year history of the Earth, and masturbation is definitely the causes, say leading Faithvolcanologists. Masturbation, long conclusively proven to be causing Global Warmings, is now known to be […]
