Detroit, MI – My dear friends in Christ through the Lonaldian Way, in this edition of IWAM, I sat down (without shaking hands) with James Pearson, a 19 year old Juggalo, who naturally lives in the basement of his parent’s home in an undisclosed suburb of Detroit. Although of normal […]
The future is here and now, people. We are currently living with the people who will control our World for the rest of our lives. If you live a normal lifestyle, you may make it to 80 or 90 now, but realisticly, you will be dead by 50-60 years old […]
We must be ever vigilant in the war against Big Masturbation. They want to turn our children into self-rapists any chance they get. Well, now there is a program designed to strengthen their bodies, minds and souls. Karate Khrist & Kids is a Lonnie Childs approved program, which will not […]
It was a cold, rainy night in Portland, OR; the home of the most masturbators in America, because it is the home of the most hipsters in America. I was waiting for a bus to take so I could preach the good words of Lonnie to a captive audience, when […]
BOCA RATON, FLA. — As everyone knows, masturbators are almost always depressed, socially retarded shut-ins. Their world consists of fixating on distasteful online pornographies flooding the Internet and beating their own privates to a pulp. Since their lives revolve around the one sinful act of Onanism, other aspects such as faith, family, […]
