Ever wonder what the name of the sportswear company, ADIDAS, stood for? Wonder no more! STOP Masturbation NOW codebreakers have deciphered the seemingly nonsensical word and it appears that the slippery tentacles of Big Masturbation have found yet another way to subliminally influence society into thinking that masturbation is “hip” […]
NEW ORLEANS, LA — “No hard feelings” is how C.J. Spiller sums up his time with the New Orleans Saints. In an concerted effort to both improve their moral image and save money at the same time, the team has cut ties with the running back on Monday. C.J. (which […]
Dear Lonnie, how many medals would Tim Tebow win if he was at the Olympics? Bart Tanner 13 Well Bart, the easy answer of course would be all of them. Laughing Out Loud! But seriously, it is a great question and involves a lot of thought. As a hypothetical […]
[table id=4 /] Continuing Rio 2016 Coverage
(StopMasturbationNOW)— Not a single Olympic medal has been awarded yet and already these Olympics have been an utter travesty. You would think these are the special Olympics but there is nothing special in Rio. Hundreds of athletes have reported semen stained bedding and in some cases semen caked on the […]
(StopMasturbationNOW)—This seasons WNBA season has come to a close. Sometime in the last couple of months the regular season ended and a champion was crowned we assume. The WNBA is a lot like the NBA except where in the NBA both genders are welcome the WNBA excludes men to give […]
(StopmasturbationNOW)—This past Sunday was the finale of the 2015 Women’s Soccer World cup. A record number of people worldwide tuned in to watch Americans destroy the Chinese and once and for all get revenge for the cowardly Pearl Harbor attacks. Initially viewers were in for a treat as the United States jumped out […]
(StopMasturbationNOW)—It’s funny how liberals always turn to science to disprove religion and conservative issues. From the scopes monkey trial to evolution, liberals trot out piece of scientific evidence after piece of scientific evidence. It’s funny how all that science goes away when it suits them. Despite everything about biology, liberals […]
(StopMasturbationNOW)—FIFA president Sepp Blatter announced his resignation on Tuesday after a second scandal in less than a week rocked the world football’s governing body. Speaking at a news conference in Zurich, Blatter said he would remain in his position until a special election can be held to appoint his successor. Domenico […]
BREAKING MASTURBATION NEWS!!! KANSAS CITY MO – League officials and Representatives of the Jackson County Board of Health are investigating claims that high concentrations of masturbation particulates were found on hot dogs sold by the Kauffman Stadium concession. Arrowmark Industries denies the charges that extensive amounts of semen microbes and […]
