Post Tagged with: "Obama"

Not for long, God willing.

Should People Who Masturbate Be Allowed to Vote?

What a country!  As God-appointed Americans, we live in a Christian land, founded on Christian morals by non-masturbating Christian heroes.  One of the great tenets of this fantastic nation in which we reside is the concept of a free democracy.  A government of the people, by the people, for the […]

by November 3, 2020 485 comments Civics
(image source: By English: Lance Corporal Antonio J. Vega, United States Marine Corps [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons)

U.S. Government ‘Accidentally’ Leaks Lonnie Childs Southwest Conquest Map

According to sources within Brother Lonnie’s University of Faith Facts, the United States has ‘accidentally’ leaked a map that B.L.U.F.F. was using for internal strategy purposes. The map in question featured the Southwest of the United States and labeled the areas that Brother Lonnie and His advisors had planned to […]

by April 4, 2015 6 comments Politics
This little guy wants you to think about him the next time you masturbate.  #SaveTheChildren

Children Are Our Future. Think About Them The Next Time You Self-Rape.

The future is here and now, people. We are currently living with the people who will control our World for the rest of our lives. If you live a normal lifestyle, you may make it to 80 or 90 now, but realisticly, you will be dead by 50-60 years old […]

by December 15, 2014 19 comments Morals
Lonnie is Homo With the Father

Lonnie is Homo With the Father

WARNING: TL;DR The Father is homo with the Son. The Son is homo with the Bird. The Bird is the Word. In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. The Word became flesh and dwelt among us. Behold, the Technical Virgin […]

Bitter and Angry Obama Flings Coffee in Marine’s Face

Bitter and Angry Obama Flings Coffee in Marine’s Face

When President Obama disembarked his helicopter in New York on Tuesday, he created a firestorm by doing what he has done thousands of times before: Salute the Marine standing on the tarmac. Only this time, he had a cup in his hands, and he somewhat awkwardly delivered the salute while […]

by September 25, 2014 9 comments Celebrity, Politics
The Self-Rape Salute: PresiDON’T Obama Disgraces His Office Yet Again

The Self-Rape Salute: PresiDON’T Obama Disgraces His Office Yet Again

Barack Hussein Obama, our first Muslim President, has disgraced the office of POTUS time and again during the six long years we’ve had to endure him. Bowing to foreign dignitaries, playing golf, wearing the wrong color, being the wrong color — there’s just nothing this arrogant, godless man won’t do […]

Obama Masturbated To Linda Ronstadt As Youth

Obama Masturbated To Linda Ronstadt As Youth

President Obama showed his true colors as a masturbator at a White House awards ceremony earlier today. The awards ceremony, honoring no longer relevant musician, Linda Ronstadt, for some reason; found Obama just mere inches away from someone he had spent his childhood fantasizing over. At point, Obama reached over […]

by July 29, 2014 9 comments Celebrity, Politics
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