Joe Ferno, of Naples Florida, has filed suit in State Superior Court, claiming that his right to marry himself is being infringed upon by Florida’s antiquated laws that state marriage is between two people. The plaintiff, an admitted ten-times a day masturbator, says he is doing what all same-self […]
Jessica King started to notice something was wrong with her prized Golden Retriever, “Rusty”. “Rusty” began eating excessive amounts of dog food and even King’s neighbors noticed that he seemed to be growing larger every day. King, distraught, took “Rusty” to the local veterinarian who was equally baffled. “Rusty”‘s diet […]
God Bless, TheRev Leroy Jenkins
By TheRev Leroy Jenkins EDWARDSVILLE, Ill. (BLUFF PRESS) – A southwestern Illinois man found mentally fit to stand trial on charges that he molested a puppy is waiting for court officials to decide if he’s a sexually dangerous person. The National Report reports former Stop Masturbation Now Inner Deacon & […]
By: TheRev Leroy Jenkins A teenage boy from Southern California has committed masturbation suicide after a clip of him masturbating in a bathroom stall went viral, leading him to being “mercilessly prayed AT” at school by Normals, BLUFF News reports. Now, the parents of 14-year-old Matthew Burdette are suing their son’s school district […]
My dear friends in Christ. May God bless you in HIS name and bestow special graces upon you for reading this most holy webpage. Jesus knows that the Internet is rife with all manner of deviance and uncouth content. The devil uses the Big Masturbation coalition of evil to infiltrate […]
Overview & Faith Facts™: Hypertrichosis, or “Masturbator’s Hairy Body” (MHB) as it is usually called, is known to have affected millions of individuals throughout recorded history. Early on, MHB afflicted individuals were thought to be “wolfmen” that were shapeshifters. Thankfully around the early 1960s, Lonnie Childs and his team of researchers […]
By: TheRev Leroy Jenkins STAFFORD, AZ (BLUFF PRESS) — Robin Williams is reconnecting with the 12-step program during a brief stay at a Brother Lonnie’s University of Faith Facts facility. A spokeswoman for the 62-year-old actor-comedian says Williams planned the visit as a respite to recharge after more than 18 straight […]
FREETOWN, SIERRA LEONE (SMNNN) — The death toll of aid workers killed by those infected in the recent Masturbation Ebola outbreak in Sierra Leone has tripled in the last week. While local health officials were originally concerned with the deaths of those infected with the disease, the concern has turned […]
WEST PALM BEACH, FLA (SMNNN) — Non-normal basketball icon, LeBron James, dodged a bullet last week during the first Game of the NBA Finals in San Antonio, Texas. James, who was forced to ride the bench during the crucial fourth period costing Miami the game, tried to pass the incident off […]
