Orange County, CA – A family is left grieving and planning arrangements today as the new “Wheelin and Feelin” craze sweeping the nation claims another young life. At approximately 11:15 AM, in sunny Laguna Beach, CA, one child has been pronounced dead and another is injured in what is being […]
Everyone knows that San Francisco is the center of world hedonism as sex in the streets and homogay parades result in traffic jams where rubbernecked citizens are seemingly shocked daily at the carnival of sin that goes on around them. Like Lott in Sodom, the righteous are left to fend […]
We all learned in history class, that back in 1892, Harriet Tubman boarded a bus and refused to move from the front seat for a White man. This caused the “Civil Rights” protests and eventually, “Affirmative Action”. What they don’t teach in Public Schools though, is the reason why this […]
The newest four color flyer will appear in B.L.U.F.F. approved publications and be given to the masses during a SMN Ministry near you. Praise!
VALENCIA, CALIF. — (SMNNN) First responders are still working to rescue riders of the “Ninja” roller coaster at Los Angeles area amusement park “Six Flags: Magic Mountain” late Monday evening. The incident happened around 5:30pm Pacific time and left four park goers injured. Witnesses on the scene said everything seemed […]
LIBERAL HOLLYWOOD, CALIF. — (SMNNN) Famous son of actor Alan Thicke (Family Ties, Tremors 2: Aftershocks), Robin Thicke has announced he has allegedly been masturbation free for four months in his latest attempt to win back his estranged assigned spouse, Paula Patton. Thicke’s spouse, Patton, originally had “had enough” of […]
Phoenix, AZ — In an ironic twist of a fate, a mascot for a Christian anti-masturbation group was arrested Sunday for masturbating in public. The organization recently finished a federally funded 31-city nationwide school tour which it says focused on educating both children and parents about the dangerous consequences of […]
SAFFORD-ARIZONA (SMNNN) Jesus H. Christ Almighty, son of God, and personal best friend forever of Lonald Childs, has just been confirmed as the guest of honor of the 17th annual “Lonnie Days” holy celebration. Says Metatron, Seraphim Voice of The Lords, in a brilliant immolation of the B.L.U.F.F campound main […]
Overview & Faith Facts™: Hypertrichosis, or “Masturbator’s Hairy Body” (MHB) as it is usually called, is known to have affected millions of individuals throughout recorded history. Early on, MHB afflicted individuals were thought to be “wolfmen” that were shapeshifters. Thankfully around the early 1960s, Lonnie Childs and his team of researchers […]
in 2010, HomoGay partners, through the Lonnie Childs golden shower of salvation, gave up their masturbating sinful ways, got married in the Lonvidian Chruch, and their procreations resulted in the worlds first HomoGay birth. BJ Barone and Frankie Nelson recently became dads to a beautiful baby named Milo, and Canadian photographer […]
