Post Tagged with: "Corruption"

Is Masturbation a Homosexual Act?

Is Masturbation a Homosexual Act?

Friends, as you know, we here at STOP Masturbation NOW ministries are dedicated to educating the world about the dangers of masturbation.  One of the more disturbing faithfacts we have uncovered is that masturbation is a gateway homosexual act that has directly led to the moral decay of this great […]

by April 28, 2020 84 comments Faith Fact Series
Masturbation Mystery Unraveled

Masturbation Mystery Unraveled

Ever wonder what the name of the sportswear company, ADIDAS, stood for? Wonder no more! STOP Masturbation NOW codebreakers have deciphered the seemingly nonsensical word and it appears that the slippery tentacles of Big Masturbation have found yet another way to subliminally influence society into thinking that masturbation is “hip” […]

by March 26, 2020 3 comments Big Masturbation, Morals, Sports
“Spin the Bottle”:  A Harmless Rite of Passage or Dangerous Masturbation Ritual?

“Spin the Bottle”: A Harmless Rite of Passage or Dangerous Masturbation Ritual?

Some say that the pre-teen game “spin the bottle” is harmless fun; a time where whimsical memories are created, a rite of passage for many a youth.  The naïve people who believe this couldn’t be more wrong! **SPIN THE BOTTLE IS A GATEWAY DRUG TO A GROUP MASTURBATION GAME CALLED […]

by February 18, 2020 4 comments Gateway Drug, Morals, Spot a Masturbator
The Pridemore Family, during happier times.

Youth Caught Self Raping

When Dana Pridemore of Evanston, IL climbed the stairs of her family’s two-story suburban home to  retire for the evening, all she had on her mind was her Harper’s Magazine and a few segments of the Tonight Show before turning in. She visited her daughter Sarah, who at the tender […]

by June 23, 2016 66 comments B.L.U.F.F., Family Values
The Currency of Big Masturbation

STOP Masturbation NOW Under Attack By Paid Shills!

Matthew 6:24 – “…You cannot serve both God and money.”   As the STOP Masturbation NOW self-celibacy movement becomes more successful and influential, it appears that the pushback from our detractors has increased as well.  It’s obvious that the masturbation lobby fear us and monitor our online activities.  Like a […]

by December 9, 2014 14 comments Big Masturbation
Mother Milk, A Good Start For Your Child?

Mother Milk, A Good Start For Your Child?

We all know eating the wrong food has many unhealthy side effects, like heart disease and cancer.  But no one knew indulging the wrong foods also ensures one will surrender quickly to the sinful pleasures of masturbation. The earlier a child eats the wrong foods, the more harmful consequences in […]

by October 9, 2014 9 comments Family Values
Is he, or isn't he?

Tipping a Waiter That Might be a Masturbator

Gratuity is a form of appreciation for good service that is only seen in civilized countries like America. A well-tended-to patron with good manners will leave an additional sum to reflect their appreciation for good service. This “tip” is usually between 15-30% of the total bill. However, tipping a suspected […]

by September 30, 2014 25 comments Etiquette
Queen-Live at the Rainbow ‘74

Queen-Live at the Rainbow ‘74

We may have figured we’d heard the last of them, but the sinister homosexual noise band, Queen, has released another splattering of dread onto the faces of the public. The deeply offensive tracks in their current live album were actually taken from a concert that occurred years ago. The music […]

by September 24, 2014 4 comments Celebrity
The Latest in Anti-Masturbation Technology for Children

The Latest in Anti-Masturbation Technology for Children

It has come to our attention that some of the lesser of our followers are a tad squeamish using the Anti-Masturbation Cross® on their children. While Brother Lonnie and God will deal with you eventually, in the meantime the Faithscientists at Brother Lonnie’s University of Faithfacts (B.L.U.F.F.)  have come up […]

by September 6, 2014 30 comments Family Values
McKayla is Not Impressed with Child Pornography

McKayla is Not Impressed with Child Pornography

(StopMasturbationNow)—World-famous meme template and sometimes Olympic gymnast, McKayla Maroney, is not impressed. Not impressed at all. Pictures of McKayla were included among those leaked in 2014’s The Fappening. Like all good Christian soldiers, she initially denied that the photos were of her (1 Thessalonians 5:22, King Lonald Version). McKayla clarified her […]

by September 4, 2014 16 comments Celebrity
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