FaithFacts Researcher: Facebook Big Masturbation Funded Study Breached Ethical Guidelines

June 30, 2014 5

By: TheRev Leroy Jenkins

Over the weekend, the sewage pipes exploded due to the massive influx of semen that overloaded sanitary systems worldwide, due to the fact that Facebook had conducted psychological pro masturbation experiments on user news feeds. While Zuckerberg’s team doesn’t see a problem with that it did, FaithFact researchers seem think it breached ethical Stop Masturbation Now ethical research guidelines.

Facebook Experimented on Random Users to Study Masturbation  Emotions

Spend time with a Debbie Diddiler, […]

Masturbation… #NotEvenOnce

June 30, 2014 31

Many famous celebrities have been caught with their hands where they shouldn’t be. The “Not Even Once” Faith Fact has been documented with a series of “Before” and “After” web photos that show the steady decline that happens after masturbating even just one time.

Feel free to share these memers with your friends, family, co-workers and church groups. It is imperative that everyone knows that masturbation disfigurement can happen to anyone – even the rich and

Faces of Masturbation

June 30, 2014 22

(STOP MASTURBATION NOW NEWS) — Perhaps you’ve heard of it. A woman in your family or close circle of friends is pregnant and ecstatic to share the news. You watch in awe as her belly grows. Yet, months later, there is no baby.
For years doctors have simply used the term miscarriage to describe this event. However, what really occured is something more dark more sinister. Fetal Masturbation Syndrome, or FMS, is a condition in which the embryo, too unintelligent and […]

Enforcing Martial Harmony 101 – Chapter 36 “The Wonder Plant”

June 30, 2014 4

The following story contains a powerful lesson about keeping the passion in marriage alive, as well as an insight into a woman’s soul.

Back in 1996 when I first came to BLUFF and found salvation, I knew nothing of the ​love and harmony that a Same Race Spouse Assignment can provide. My fiancé was overweight, foreign, and her fingers smelled like fish. She was a masturbator.

On our wedding night I came to my wife’s chambers and commanded her to assume the […]

Kim Jong-Un Angry At Seth Rogen For Filming Masturbation Snuff Film

June 25, 2014 20

PYONGYANG, DPRK — (SMNNN) In a surprising move today, North Korean leader Kim Jong-un took time out from recording music with Snoop Dogg, to declare a recent film by Seth Rogen as an “act of war against all who oppose masturbation”. Rogen’s new film stars himself and fellow liberal masturbator and pot addict, James Franco, as masturbators who are tasked with assassinating world leaders such as Kim Jong-un and Lonnie Childs.

The state-run KCNA news agency referred to Rogen as a […]

Masturbation Is the Pits – How Many More Innocents Must Suffer?

June 25, 2014 30

In Britain it is not illegal to self-rape while operating a motor vehicle.

Tragedy struck the village of Leeds, West Yorkshire this week, when a masturbating father was too busy pleasuring himself with the base gratification of self-rape to notice that his daughter, a toddler, had walked behind his reversing car – a judgement lapse that was to prove fatal! Why does it always seem to be the innocents who are made to suffer at the hands of unrepentant masturbators? Angel […]

Depraved Twitter User Hides Masturbation Supplies On College Campus

June 24, 2014 7

SACRAMENTO, CALIF. — (SMNNN) A user on the popular world wide web netsite “Twitter” hid 18 hidden caches of masturbation supplies on the Sacramento State University college campus early Tuesday morning. Multiple Sacramento State students and unrepentant masturbators in the city of Sacramento flocked to the campus to search for the hidden supplies. Some masturbators confirmed they found the gift baskets that contined a box of tissues and some hand lotion.

Just one of 18 hidden masturbation care packages found earlier today.

“Twitter” […]

WARNING!!! ACHTUNG!!!!

June 24, 2014 14

Big Masturbation has reportedly invented a device the runs on self-rape.

The hussy pictured above is an agent of Big Masturbation. Her face is blacked out to protect the precious youth of B.L.U.F.F.

She was spotted just outside the main gates of B.L.U.F.F. near the moat. She is a sinner, sent to flaunt her own sexual deviance and coerce the students of B.L.U.F.F. to self gratify.

Under no circumstance should this woman be allowed on the compound campus.

If you see this […]

…My Glimmer of Hope

June 23, 2014 1

By Cassidy Pen

My dear friends in Lonnie and Christ, many of you remember my SRAS, Angela Pen.

My days have been filled with the empty pain of loneliness since my beloved sras went missing. My spirit, cursed with hearing rumors of her capture at the hands of self raping non-normals, sinks further into an emotional pitfall.

All of my endeavors, once done with the vigor of salvation that Lonnie’s grace rewards, are now stale and grey to me.

My ministry, once a staple […]

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